Laura the Vicar

2nd Sunday in Easter Sermon

2010-04-10T17:41:00.000-07:00

I know it is Easter, but I want to take you back to another church season; that of Christmas. We all have our favorite Christmas movies: the Bells of St. Mary’s, It’s a Wonderful Life, A Christmas Story, and so on. We could take time now to name about a few dozen without even blinking.

One of my favorite Christmas movies came out in the early 90’s and is called “The Santa Clause”. It stars Tim Allen as a business man who has Santa fall off his roof, making him the new Santa Clause. Him and his son get in the sleigh, help deliver the toys and end up in the North Pole.

At first, Tim Allen’s character Scott Calvin doesn’t believe any of this. Like most adults, he doesn’t believe in Santa. He goes along with it for the sake of his son but that is all. He fights tooth and nail all the changes taking over him; the weight gain, the cravings for milk and cookies, the beard that won’t go away. Throughout the movie he is reminded that seeing isn’t believing but rather believing is seeing. He soon comes to terms with that fact that he is the new Santa and the North Pole is real. He learns to embrace his new role.

Here in John, we encounter another moment like in the movie that takes a leap of faith. Thomas is faced with his doubt, better translated as unbelief. He does not believe that the figure standing in front of him truly is the resurrected Jesus. It can’t be. He is dead. He is in the tomb. There is no possible way someone who endured what happened on the cross could truly be standing in front of him. He needs to feel tangibly for himself that it is Jesus. He needs the nail holes in Christ’s hands and feet.

We all have a bit of Thomas living inside of us. We are people who need evidence to base truth on. We have heard the story of Thomas and in many ways we have all lived it. Each of us at one point or another in our lives have probably asked God to “show me a sign, Lord” or “Please God, give me some evidence that you are here”. It is a natural human response to want evidence to base a fact on. In moments of intense pain or times when we cannot sense God’s presence, it is not surprising we ask these questions.
And why wouldn’t we? We live in a world where "evidence" trumps faith. We send robots with cameras to the farthest ends of the universe so we can know for sure what's out there. We won't believe an assertion until a complicated mathematical equation says it's true. And anytime--anytime--there is a wall bearing a sign "wet paint," many of us will touch it just to be sure.

That is the world we live in. That is the way our brain works. We are taught from an early age that to believe, we must see. We are taught this with everything in our lives except when it comes to Jesus. There we are taught to change our way of thinking, to go against what has become the norm. That is not an easy thing to do.

Yet this is what faith calls us to. It calls us to believe with all our hearts our loved one will be healed. It takes us to the place of trust that even though money is tight now, everything will turn out just fine in the end. It encourages us to hope in the impossible, to trust in a God we cannot tangibly touch is there with us, guiding us along the way.

The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.” This is what leaders and visionaries do. They believe in something bigger than themselves and they begin to act as if it is so.

We are called as the body of Christ to take that step of faith and trust in a God whom we cannot touch like Thomas did. We cannot put our finger in his hand or side and know that he died and rose from the dead. We are to believe in what we cannot see.

We are to believe that even though we are not presented with the physical, resurrected Christ we still encounter him on a daily basis. For he lives and breathes in each of us. Just as he blew the Holy Spirit upon the disciples in the upper room, he has done the same for us as the church on Pentecost. While he does not stand before us today as the bodily resurrected Christ, he is standing before you this day. He is seated next to you in your pew. He is playing the organ during this service. He is being eaten and drank during Holy Communion. We are surrounded by the resurrected Christ 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

For Jesus is alive, he is resurrected. God is present all around us. What we are asked to do is to take that first step even when we don’t see the whole staircase. We are to remember that to see isn’t to believe, but believing is seeing. Just because we cannot see Christ as he was 2,000 years ago does not mean he isn’t here. The evidence is all around us, if we would just take the time to see through our belief.

I remember several years ago a person I know well was working as a nursing assistant. After watching a slow and painful death of one of her patients she told me she didn’t know how anyone could believe in a loving God after witnessing such a horrible thing. How could any God allow such a thing to happen? Obviously God wasn’t there.

Not long after that, I sat next to a bedside of someone dying from a very painful cancer. It was a long, painful, and drawn out death. The family and I stood beside the patient, having prayer, along with the family telling him how much he was loved. As I stood there, I couldn’t help but to think about how very real God was at that moment. How much his presence was alive in that room.
That is the difference between faith and unbelief. It is the difference in the lens through which you view. For to look in on a situation such as a painful death with eyes of unbelief, all you see is pain and death. Through the lens of belief, what you witness is something far different. You can see past the pain and death and look at the same scene with eyes that see love and everlasting life.

This is the gift we are given in the resurrection. It is knowing that death is not the end. It is being able to believe and see the world through a whole different light. We can see the spring in the midst of winter. We can know and trust that Jesus Christ has risen from the dead and that we too will experience new life. For to believe is to see that the grave is not the end. It is to know that we can proclaim Alleluia with hope and assurance. Amen.

Good Friday Meditation

2010-04-02T09:11:00.000-07:00

It is a tremendous loss to have someone you love die. It is an even greater loss to watch your Messiah die. To watch as your hopes for a better future are shut down by the furious crowd crying out to crucify him. To listen to the words of judgment being spoken that you know are so unjust. To smell the stench of death as you inch closer and closer to Golgotha.

Yes, it is one of the most painful things we will face to lose someone we love. But to watch as your hope is being shut down as the one you believe came to save you from unjust persecution, hopelessness, trials, pain, and fear is something unmatched. For as you watch the one you call Messiah die painfully and unjustly is to watch any hope that love truly does trump evil fall away.

This is the pain felt by the disciples on that Friday. While words were spoken by Jesus, preparing them for this day, they were silenced by disbelief it could really happen. When words of hope were spoken that this was not the end, they were deadened by the crowds and hatred surrounding them. The day we call Good Friday was anything but good for the men and women who loved and followed Jesus. To them the world they knew with Jesus, and the world they knew prior to his coming, was now about to be lost. They believed they were entering a world that would never see love and hope again; a world worse off than ever before. They believed that what was happening to Jesus would also be the path they would soon take.

To try and imagine what it was like on that day is a task that is somewhat impossible for us to do. Like the reality of the situation was for the disciples on that day, we are too far removed from the truth of the real pain that was felt. We are unable to completely and without bias imagine a world without the hope and grace we experience today. We know the end of the story; to read and hear the words of the Gospel narratives on Good Friday without that knowledge is impossible.

Yet we try. We must try. For we as Christians need to attempt to experience the pain of that day. In attempting this great feat we are able to understand more fully the true sacrifice that the cross is. This is a way in which we attempt to not take what happened on this day, nearly two thousand years ago, for granted.

It is imperative we remember the pain. The pain Jesus felt as he carried that cross to the hill; his body ripped from his wounds, the sweat that covered him, the energy spent. We must remember the agony of the nails, ripping through his flesh and bone. We must remember the weight of his body pulling at his lungs and trachea. We must remember the hurls of insults, the lack of respect, the pain of knowing these are the people for whom you are dying. We must remember.

This is for us to remember, to force ourselves to open our eyes to, for it is us this pain is felt. It is for us that God came down to us in the form of a human. We are the ones Jesus the Christ is experiencing the pain for. We are the reason he was wounded. We are the reason he suffered. We are the reason he died.

Let us remember, take ourselves back to a time and a place of pain. A time that makes the losses we have experienced in our own lives, the ones that cause us the most pain imagineable, seem small in comparison to the death of our Messiah, our Christ. For without his pain, his suffering, his death…we would be without hope.
This is the truth of Good Friday. It is the truth we must face in order to continue on to tomorrow and Sunday. We must know and internalize the death of Jesus to see the truth of the cross. We must know it to understand what is to come. So take yourself back. Breathe in the message. Mourn like the disciples mourned. And remember this is not the end. Amen.

Sermon on Control

2010-03-20T17:11:00.000-07:00

We all have a past. For some, they are pasts we can find pride in. For others, the past is something we would rather forget.

For all of us, there are things we have done in our pasts that bring us shame. I remember well the things of my past that though I would like to forget, still haunt me. One situation occurred as a child. When I was in elementary school, I was a very shy child, and like most 8 or 9 year olds, longed to be accepted. One of my neighbors and childhood friends was very unpopular. She was picked on ruthlessly by the children in our school. Yet I never stood up for her. In fact, I would sometimes laugh along with the other children. Later in the day I would apologize and tell her I didn’t mean it, but yet the next day I would still do it, so as not to be picked upon myself. I still regret my behavior to this day, and even when we correspond now as adults, that childhood past still haunts me.

The season of Lent in the church is one that offers us a unique opportunity. It is a time for us as the body of Christ to journey towards the cross. This is a journey which is to take us, lead us, in a time of reflection, journeying through this life from cradle to grave.

No one in this world knows how long our journey will be. We do not know what challenges will arise along the way. Some may face the ghosts of their past, calling them to reflection, confession, and repentance. Some of us may battle the pain of illness, whether it be physical or mental. We may journey through the challenges of broken relationships or past abuse. We may be faced with realization we must deal with the heavy load we bear financially. This road from cradle to grave brings with it many past or present hurts that we would rather not deal with. We are faced in this journey with the realization that life has and will continue to bring us situations that are beyond our control.

Paul’s letter to the Philippians echoes this truth. He writes to the people of Philippi from prison, reminding them and us of the importance of perspective. We are told that we are to gain perspective by reflecting on our past, present, and future, and how they can come together at any given moment.
Paul is speaking from a perspective that can understand the struggles people may face with their pasts. When we look at my example and Paul’s past, there is a laughable gap between their severity. We know of Paul’s past from his account in the book of Acts. He was one of the greatest persecutors of Christians in his time. He was known to torture and kill any followers of the Way, the name for Christianity at that time. He would harm women, child, and men, all because of their profession of faith in Christ.

Paul does not shy away from acknowledging his past to the people he is writing to. He knows that through reflecting on and acknowledging his past, it makes his claims and boasts as a Christian even more authentic. Paul is able to reflect on the sins of his past, yet embrace with pride the things which he has and continues to do that is for the Gospel. His words are considered more honest and real, and people listen to him, because he is able to boast of the Gospel while acknowledging that he once was one that caused harm to the church.

In Paul’s writings, he takes time to compare himself to his opponents. He acknowledges that once they were his peers, and then states that the things he did in his past count for nothing. While he does not say that as person in the past he had no value; what he is saying is that what matters is the here and now. He is putting his life’s journey into perspective.

His perspective has changed. The things he valued in the past no longer have meaning. Once, Paul valued power, riches, and control. While he hasn’t disengaged himself completely from his past, as he still counts himself an Israelite, and he is still quite zealous with his behavior…he no longer seeks the things that do not matter. What has changed is his standard. For you see, Paul no longer evaluates his life based upon what he has or how much power he has gained; For Paul, that standard is now his understanding of the life pattern established by Christ.

Paul now views his life through the lense of the cross. He recognizes that faith and service are what constitutes as a way in which to evaluate ones life. Paul knows that the things of this world will happen and are beyond our control. What matters is not that they happen but how we respond. Do we respond through selfish means in order to gain, or do we respond with faith, hope, love, and hearts that serve. Do we respond through the lense of the cross?
Paul acknowledges in his letter to the Philippians that the future has as much impact on our present as does the past. We can easily become trapped in the despair of the past, making us feel as though our faces are against the wall with no where to turn. In contrast, hope in the future can help us to press on towards the unknown. Indeed, our present is shaped from what we have experienced and what we have to hope in.

As we hear in Philippians, Paul had great hope in the future. His writings are surrounded by words of encouragement and hope in the promise of the resurrection and life in Christ. This shaped how he faced the present and helped sustain him in the present, urging him on towards the future.

As we face this life, we can learn a great deal from Paul. While there are so many things that we face that are beyond our control, we can know that living in this present reality is a part of the journey. While things may have happened in our past that we are not proud of, they are a part of our journey towards the cross. We can use those experiences to help shape how we deal with the present. We can look towards the hope of the future, knowing the promise given by Christ that we will receive the prize, we can have hope and trust in the resurrection of the dead.
This hope, and this encouragement we receive from Scripture, can help us to face those things which are beyond our control. In our Gospel reading, the disciples and all who loved Jesus were learning of what was to come. They refused to accept that indeed Christ was going to die. While they didn’t want to accept the fact that they could not control the bad things from happening to Jesus, there was hope to be found, there was comfort that was offered.

What we are told in this lesson is to not simply look at the small picture of our pain and suffering, but to look at the larger scope. While Jesus’ death looked hopeless to the disciples, it was not. While the pain had to be felt and the suffering had to take place, there was hope to be found in that moment. This is our journey from birth to the grave. This is the gift of this Lenten season, for we are reminded to open our minds and hearts to the bigger picture. The grave is not the end. Suffering does not last forever. Joy is to be found beneath the cross. Amen.

Surgery Info

2010-03-19T19:10:00.001-07:00

Hey everyone, sorry for being so out of it in terms of blogging. My life has been eaten up by jaw problems and work. If you have not been following my other blog, there is a lot of info on my upcoming surgery. Please visit: www.mylifewithtmd.blogspot.com for more info.

A Little on Life

2010-01-09T20:29:00.000-08:00

Here is an update from my other blog (link in previous post). I thought I might as well share it on here since this has been a larger part of my life lately. I recently went to my first consultation with my new oral surgeon at John Hopkins.

Other than this, things are going fairly well. We had a great Christmas. My mother was in from Alaska for the last month. My sister Jamie also joined us for two weeks. It was great to have a house full of people and made the holidays so much fun.

Both congregations are doing well. It has been difficult to keep up with work when my jaw has been doing so poorly. Pain management hasn't been so great, so I am having to learn how to balance things. It hasn't been easy but I am learning. I really feel God is testing me in new ways and I am growing from it. Looking forward to a calm period in life any day now though... :)

Alright, here is the update from the other blog. Hope you are all doing well. Promise to keep the updates coming more frequently from now on!

I apologize that it has taken so long to post about my appointment. The past few days I have been extra tired. It's been exceedingly difficult to maintain my schedule with the fatigue.
By the time I would sit down to post, I would fall asleep!

The hospital was much larger than I expected it to be. While I had visited before, I never actually went inside. This would have been a good idea, as it took much longer to make my way through than I anticipated. It would a good thing I arrived early because by the time I made my way from the parking garage to the oral surgeons, I only had five minutes to spare! It took about 20 minutes to walk from my car to the appointment. Amazing!

They did a panoramic x-ray which I expected. I hadn't had one done in a number of years so it was good to have a new one done. I was glad I had brought so much of my medical history with me, including a written report from my ENT, the original write-up from my accident, and a list of all the medications and treatments I have had over the last few years. It was much longer than I had realized but shows just how much treatment i've really gone through.

What we have found so far is that the condyles of my jaw are flat with bone spurs on them. The condyles are supposed to be rounded so this is not good news but is to be expected with the length of time I have had TMD and the clenching/grinding I have been doing for 22 years. They also found I have signicant myofascial problems which we already knew. We will not know much else without an MRI.

The appointment was about an hour long. There is little hope for conservative treatment due to the fact i've already done almost everything there is to do. They do not want me using the NTI splint anymore because it is doing more damage than good. The doctors (there were two) prescribed 800mg 3 times a day of motrin plus a new muscle relaxant (skelaxin) to see if it will help. In a couple weeks i'll go in to make a mold for a new mouthpiece to wear 24 hours a day. They are hoping this will help a bit.

If this doesn't work they will do athrocentesis. This is an outpatient procedure where the doctors go into the jaw laproscopically, clean out the joints and look around to get a better picture of what is going on. While they do this they inject steroids into the joint. If this doesn't work we will move forward with surgery.

The surgery we are planning on is twofold: The doctors will round out the condyles to give them a normal shape, hopefully prevents the discs from getting lost again. They will then attempt to get the discs back to where they belong. If the discs are too far damaged, they will remove the discs permanently.

90% of cases of TMD do get better with conservative treatment. The doctors said they would have expected to see mine respond better by this point. I will admit, I hold little hope for mine to get better without surgery; maybe i'm just too much of a pessimist at this time and place in my life. I think i've just been through too many treatments to have hope anymore. When the doctor wrote out the prescriptions I just kind of rolled my eyes. I've been doing NSAIDS and muscle relaxants for so long, why would a higher dose do any good? Oh well, you just go with it and make them happy. He told me it is to look good for insurance. He said most of these steps are too look good for insurance, and because most cases do get better. He also said though that no doctor ever expects to see a jaw look like mine at 29 years old. So I guess i'm just the weirdo. :)

My physical therapist encouraged me to call the doctor back after my appointment to ask for trigger point injections. He felt the motrin/muscle relaxant therapy was not enough for me. Since I would have to wait three weeks before seeing the doctor again, he didn't want me to continue hurting. My PT feels the muscles are too tight to be relieved through pills and I really need the injections. So, I called hopkins up again and have an appointment for the 13th. They wouldn't let me leave a message for the doctor to ask if he would be willing to do the injections. All I was able to do was make the appointment. I hope the doctor is willing to do it, otherwise it is a wasted 6 hours of driving. Oh well, here's hoping! The shots don't sound pleasant, but if it helps relieve the pain for a while, it is a good thing.

Overall, the appointment was amazing. He is a tremendous doctor, considered I guess the #1 in Maryland and one of the top in the nation. He treated me with a lot of respect and listened so well. I've never felt so validated in regards to my TMD and I really feel like i'm in good hands. It is the first time I know there is some direction with this and I have hope that maybe one day I won't be in pain. Just having that hope makes it all worth it.

2nd Sunday of Christmas Sermon

2010-01-02T20:39:00.000-08:00

Before I post my sermon, I will share with you that I do now have a second blog. I was planning to keep this other one anonymous, hence it being completely separate. After much prayer however, I felt it may be beneficial to share it with you. This other blog is solely about medical. It is not glossed over at all and can be rather depressing which is another reason it is separate. I didn't want this blog to be about that. I am possibly approaching a surgery or two (hopefully only one) to deal with something I have been semi-privately faced since I was a child. If you would like to follow this journal, the site is: http://www.mylifewithtmd.blogspot.com/ I created this site as a way to start journaling my feelings and to possibly connect with others. I've never really talked openly about it so it has been quite healing already...and I only started it a couple days ago! Anyway, if you want to read it, I would love your prayers. If not, I don't blame you. Again, i'm not my normal bubbly self on it. Alright, here is a sermon for you.

Love to you all. I promise i'll post a real update on here soon. Sorry for being so cut off lately. I will catch up with all of your blogs soon. Miss you all and thank you for staying in touch!

As our world watched the ball drop over Time’s Square a few nights ago, ringing in the new year of 2010, there were shouts of joy, hugs, resolutions, and auld lang syne sung from coast to coast. New year’s is often thought to be a time to reminisce about the good times of the year past, and a time to resolve to make the new year that comes about one that will be even better. We resolve to lose weight, watch our finances, be better parents, attend church more.

As I’ve listened to the news over this last week, I’ve heard almost a sense of urgency to ring in this new year. The sense of bullet proofness we once had as a country seems to have been shattered a bit. As we recently felt the threat of terrorism touch us again, fear has rung within hearts and within the media. The economic stability of our country has been shattered as financial institutions fail, the Dow tanks, and oil prices have escalated.

I recently read the statistic that sadly psychiatric hospitals nationwide are reporting that admissions have more than doubled due to people suffering extreme stress about home foreclosures, job losses, and plunging stock prices.

People around us are looking for something to hope in, to trust in as the year ahead emerges. As this new year begins, I have heard more people come to me asking for prayer that this new year will be better than the last one; saying it has to be better than the last one. Their hope, their faith, is depending on God bringing them some good news in this new year of 2010.

The storms of 2009 were too much, the weight of the losses, those that were economic, those of health, of loved ones, and the many other kinds that come sweeping along overwhelmed this year and overwhelmed their hearts.

In the Gospel of John, we are given truth, we are given hope, and we are given a promise. We are given the truth that has been with us from the beginning of time. In his opening statement, John starts out with the phrase that says, “In the beginning”. It opens this way just as Genesis does for a purpose. For in the beginning was the Word, Logos. In greek, Word, or Logos, can mean many things. In fact, it’s definition takes over 60 pages to define.

It means so much more than the simple written word. It means so much more than logic. It means so much more than God’s word incarnate, Jesus Christ. In fact, I could preach on this one complex word Logos for days on end and not get to the heart of what God’s logos means to us, but thanks be to God I will not do so this day. But know this truth; God’s Word, God’s Logos, Jesus Christ, God’s Son, the word made flesh, was present in the beginning of time, actively creating the world, the birds, the waters, the air, the animals, humanity. God’s word, Logos, came down to earth and became human out of love for creation.

It is important for us to understand this word Logos, because the Word, the same word who has been loving us and creating us since the beginning, came down to earth to save us from our sins by dying on the cross and rising from the grave, and still comes to us to bring us hope. The word, God’s Logos, has not left us.

The word of God is still very much alive. The word is the light that shines in the darkness. It is the message that we receive as we enter this Epiphany season. The word of God offers us hope as we hear it read each and every time we open our scriptures. Each time we hear it said, The word of the Lord, we are reminded that indeed, the word of the Lord, God’s Logos, the word made flesh, is alive and present in our midst. God’s logos, is offering us hope as we enter this new year.

Here, in today's scripture passage we hear this hope echoed in John. Did you know that this very passage, the opening chapter of John, is a nativity story? Certainly, we do not hear about a manger. There is no Mary riding in a donkey, there is no Joseph, no star in the east or shepherds watching over their flocks by night.

But what we do have is the logos, God’s word made flesh, God’s word incarnate, God’s love being birthed into this world through human flesh. God became just like us, hands and feet, dirty diapers and all through the Christ child so that we can become like him. In Jesus, we are able to see the face of God, the hope and promise that we are cared for, we are loved, we are forgiven.

Just as the logos comes to us in scripture, he comes to us in the waters of baptism. As we are reminded in the words of Paul this Sunday, God has adopted us as his children through the water and the word. We are made a part of God’s family through the word made flesh, through Jesus Christ. God comes down to us in this act, through the logos. We are sealed, we are marked, as his own.

The logos is alive and well in Holy Communion through the elements of bread and wine and through the word. Through the element and through the word, we know that Jesus Christ is indeed present and we are fed with his body and blood. Through the logos, we know that God comes down. We know that we are fed for the journey, to share the good news that the word of God incarnate, Jesus Christ forgives our sins and his grace is sufficient.

We can know that through us, God’s people, the word, God’s logos, is alive within this world. We are called the body of Christ. Jesus tells us that we are members of his body, here to spread his word throughout the world. We have been called and sent to continue keeping his word alive. We are entrusted with his message. We are part of what keeps the hope alive. We are a part of his promise. We are a part of the promise to reach out to one another during the difficult moments in each other’s lives. We are one of the many ways in which God does come down for one another. We are bearers of the good news to one another. We are the ones who can bring hope to the hopeless and joy to the one in sorrow.

As the Christmas season passes and we enter the new year, it is easy for us to forget the Christmas message. It is easy to walk passed the newborn king and neglect the message that God came. While we know that God has come, what we often do not let sink into our hearts is that the God who has come still comes. The newborn king in the manger is not left in the manger. The newborn king who grew into an adult and died on a cross was not left on a cross.

The logos, the word made flesh, still comes. As we enter this new year of 2010, let us remember the good news we can trust and hope in; the promise that we have assurance of. Let us remember the word made flesh, that has been with us since the beginning and will never leave us. For he is a light in the darkness, and the darkness will not overcome it. Amen.

Christmas Eve Sermon

2009-12-30T23:08:00.000-08:00

There are many words used to describe this time of year. Within our culture people will tell you that Christmas is their favorite holiday. When asked to describe how one experiences this season, they will tell you it is filled with “happiness”, “contentment”, “laughter”, “memories”, “busy-ness”, “warmth”, and so on. One of the words I hear most often used to describe this season, especially within the church realm is joy.

When you look up the word joy, you will find Webster defines it as “the emotion evoked by well being, success, or good fortune”…you will also see a secondary definition listed stating that it is a “state of happiness or felicity”.

In considering the Christmas celebrations we hold in our homes, surrounded by the presents, extravagant meals we bake, and the decorations that adorn our tables, shelves, and walls, the joy we experience from these things work well within Webster’s idea of what joy is. This kind of joy does indeed bring about some sense of success and happiness to our lives.

Where Webster tends to falter however, I believe, is when we come upon the story of that Christmas eve so many years ago. When the angel appeared to the shepherds on that night and proclaimed, “do not be afraid; for see-I am bringing you good news of great joy for all people: to you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is the Messiah, the Lord.” For here, in this story, we learn about a different kind of joy. It is not your ordinary kind of joy, it is great joy, proclaimed to us from the highest realm, from the messengers of God to the ordinary people, sharing the good news that a savior has come.

For you see, the problem with Websters idea of joy is it has a hard time getting past the realm of something that is self-induced. Within our culture, we scramble to make our own joy, to find our own joy. This is why so often walmart parking lots are full, Christmas parties are abundant, and the bars are always packed…people are trying to find real, pure joy.

Real joy, true joy, is not something we can make ourselves. It is not found under the Christmas tree, in driving out to do our Christmas shopping. We don’t find it in the hundreds of goodies we get to eat throughout the season or even in the Christmas specials we watch on television. While we can find some form of joy in these activities, how long can it last? 15 minutes? An hour? When the television goes off, when the last cookie is eaten, or the last gift is unwrapped, we will again find ourselves empty and void, with the little high worn off and will be reminded that self induced joy is not the real thing.

The real joy that we receive is not a product or even a byproduct of something. It is not a spinoff of something or the generic brand; it is indeed true and authentic. It is why we are all gathered here on this evening. It is the reason for the angel’s proclamation to the shepherds.

True joy is a gift, given to us simply because of our loving God. It is the good news humanity had been waiting for, longing for, or as scripture says, “groaning for like a women in labor pains.” We had been anxiously praying for the coming Messiah, the savior who would free us from our sinful selves.

This was something we had learned overtime was the kind of joy we could not do on our own. Humanity had learned the hard way that this was not the self-induced kind of joy; it had to be the real thing. We needed to wait for God’s help, for we were fully dependent upon his grace. And so we waited, anxiously, yearning, for the day that the Messiah would come and bring us the true joy, the real thing. And finally, it had come in the form of a baby in a manger.

For you see, this is real joy. It is something that happened to us, to humanity. It wasn’t because of something we achieved. We didn’t do anything to earn it. We didn’t do anything that was deserving of the Christ child. Jesus’ coming was solely a gift, given to us because of God’s love. The joy we experience is our response to the gift that we have received.

We are joyful because we know the bad news. We know that without God’s love, without this Christ child, there is no way we could free ourselves from our sin. We know that we are in bondage. The reality that without Jesus coming, we would be condemned to death is something we all face. Knowing the truth of our situation makes the situation so much greater. It makes the joy so much greater.
The birth of Christ is a story that is about joy, true joy. It is about joy at its purest form. When we understand the joy of Christ’s birth, it brings about a greater understanding of what joy means in other areas of our lives. At the birth of a new child. When we go in for medical tests. At the death of a loved one. At a birthday celebration. At the homecoming of a grown child. At an Easter celebration. At Sunday worship. At a gathering of friends. As we sit down for dinner.

We can understand real joy during good and the bad times, the large celebrations and the small ones, in a new light. For Christ is with us in all times and in all places, and his birth message is given to us all.

For Christ’s joy is for everyone to experience because the good news of great joy is for all the people. The Savior, Jesus Christ, is for everyone. Not just those of us who are sitting here this evening but those who are not in worship as well. Not just the reverent, but the irreverent, too. Not just the righteous, but the unrighteous.

It is important for us to understand that God’s message is for all of us, in all times and in all places. The real joy Christ brings is for everyone. If you believe you’re beyond help, know the real joy that the Christ child is the helper of those in need of help. If you believe you’re past grace, know the real joy that the Christ child has given to you his grace. If you believe you’re out of hope, know the real joy that the Christ child has come to restore your hope. If you believe there is no way out of your situation, know the real joy the Christ child has come to take you by the hand and lead you home. Amen.

42 countries in 14 months

2009-09-27T23:45:00.000-07:00

I found this video, while kind of silly, to be incredibly moving.

All are welcome

2009-09-19T13:46:00.000-07:00

There are few in this world today who do not love children. The presence of a baby can make the heart of just about anyone melt. When a young toddler yell’s hi as we walk down the aisle at the supermarket it is impossible not to say hi back. When a kindergartener says something so funny you cannot help but to laugh. Children are a vital part of our community and of our lives.

This is one of the reasons so many love the stories of Jesus with the children. We have all probably seen dozens of different images of Jesus surrounded by children. There are beautiful images of Jesus swinging a small child around, laughing along with him. I’ve seen wonderful artists portrayals of Jesus cradling a baby in his arms. Jesus loves children just as we all do. So when we hear about Jesus taking a small child and speaking to his disciples about welcoming a child, our hearts tend to melt a little.

What is so fascinating about our Gospel passage for today is there are so many layers that need to be unraveled. Like most scripture, we cannot take it at face value. If we were to apply this passage to our own culture, we would view the children as a welcomed part of the community. We would think of how easy it is to welcome a child, as we do so all the time.

The interesting component to this is during Jesus’ time, children were not as welcome as they are today. In fact, young children were viewed as useless and in the way. They were disposable commodities within their culture. Part of this had to do with the fact that many children did not live very long. The other part had to do with young children not being of working age. Since they had little to contribute to society, they were viewed as almost sub-human until they reached an age where they could work.

The focus of our Gospel text for this Sunday is one that speaks to welcoming the invisibles of this world. Jesus tells us that the kingdom of heaven is indeed counter-cultural. Jesus is to be seen in small children, in the lepers, in the tax collectors. Jesus is even to be seen on a cross and here again he announces his impending death to the disciples. These lessons are difficult to accept for his disciples, and can often be difficult for us to hear today.

Here, Jesus calls his disciples, and ultimately us, to humble ourselves. The disciples had been fighting over who is the greatest, who would take over after Jesus was gone. Jesus takes this argument and tells them no one is the greatest.

Just like any good parent or teacher he tells them we are all equal. We are all saint and sinner, no one is greater than the other. We are to view ourselves the same as we view the invisibles of our community. We are to humble ourselves and welcome the child, eat with the criminal, shake the hand of the tax collector. We are to view each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, as Christ can be seen in each of us.

So often this text and other texts like it become a rags to riches kind of story. They are told in a way where the least become the greatest, the underdog becomes the winner and receives the trophy. But really, Jesus’ teaching here is so much more than that. It is not about becoming the underdog so we can get the reward. Rather, Jesus is telling us that we are to humble ourselves, not bickering about who is the greatest. No, we are to humble ourselves in turn recognizing that we are all equal in the eyes of God. We are to humble ourselves, not so that we get the reward, but because we are called to be humble. We are called to view ourselves and the child as brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus.

We are not to be chasing after power or greatness. We are not to be placing ourselves on a pedestal as being the better Christian or more worthy to come to the communion railing. We are not to be working towards reaching a certain social status so that we have the better homes, better cars, better phones, or better clothes. We are called to reject all of these things as contrary to the kingdom of God.

None of these things matter to God’s kingdom. As is so often said, you can’t take a suitcase to heaven. Jesus tells us in this passage to stop worrying about worldly things. We are to focus on what is important, what really matters in the bigger picture. We need to stop chasing after the things of this world; instead we are to follow the way of the cross. We are to be following in the way of the cross that seemed so repulsive to Peter and to all who would use power to reinforce social barriers and hierarchies that keep folks from seeing one another as children of God.

A student at Luther seminary recently shared the following story about a woman she met in Kenya named Doris. She lives in the poorest slum in Kenya, in a tiny shack made out of cardboard, and the slum she lives in is "guarded" by corrupt police officers who are always trying to get bribe money. She welcomed her grandchildren into her home to live (no one knows if their parents were alive or not). Her grandchildren are HIV positive and she contracted the disease from them.

She faithfully walks with them for 2 hours each way every Sunday to bring them to church, and Doris makes the walk by herself each week to go to a support group at church for people living with HIV/AIDS. She welcomed the visiting college students, all white Americans into her home, even though doing so was dangerous to her life because it drew the attention of the police, who asked for a bribe that our group refused to give. The police could have thrown her in jail, or worse. The students also drew the attention of her neighbors, who might have thought that since she had white people visit, she must have more wealth than they thought, and they could have robbed her and hurt her.

Doris’ story is an example to us of what it means to walk the way of the cross. It is to humble oneself, to take risks, by welcoming the outcasts of the community. For Doris, we knew the risk she was taking by welcoming white people into her home. And yet she knew that is what Jesus calls us to do. She knew that the students were her brothers and sisters in Christ, and so she welcomed them, just as Jesus called the disciples to welcome a small child. For whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.

The call for us, brothers and sisters, is to recognize that we are all a part of this great family following the path of the cross. We are a family called to take down the barrier of the labels such as invisible or outcast. We are to take down the walls that divide us, recognizing that no one is worthy of the kingdom of God, yet Christ still suffered for our sins and he still welcomes us to the banquet feast. We are to welcome each other, knowing that we are all saints and we are all sinners, and journey together on the road of humility towards the cross. Amen.

Streams in the Desert

2009-09-05T17:28:00.000-07:00

It was 700 BC, and life had become a desert to God’s people. The world once known by the Israelite community was no more. Their lives had dried up; their emotions were spent, food had gone to waste, their city was demolished.

The people of God were now in captivity. Their capital city had been incinerated and their houses of worship were destroyed. It had been fifty years since their captivity had begun. Their young men had all been killed and the king had been blinded. All they had once called their own was now gone. Their city, their sons, their temples, their homes. Everything they loved was dried up, wasted away. Their hearts and minds had given way to a hopelessness.

These are the people whom we hear about in today’s Isaiah reading. They are God’s chosen people, living through a desert time; fifty years in the sands of captivity and sorrow. The life they had known was dried up and wasted away. All that was left of them was an empty shell of a broken heart.

The people spoken of in Isaiah’s writings are ones whom speak to the deserts we all walk through. The context in which Isaiah is writing is one that transcends culture and time. It speaks to those times we all experience when the streams of our lives have been overcome, leaving us dried up, broken down, and burned out. All that is left is the cracked clay and blowing sand.

The words of Isaiah in chapter 35 bring us to a new beginning, a promise to all of God’s people. It bridges for us a time when the prophet was sharing God’s message of judgment on the nations. It was a time of living through hard truths, heartache, and sorrow. This chapter takes us from the time of living in the dried up places and brings us into a message of promise. It is a message that takes us to the promise of a highway in the wilderness, of streams in the desert. This chapter opens to us the hope of the coming Messiah, who would deliver us from our sin and bring us to reconciliation, to grace.

Our lives can be very much like those of the Israelite people. We too live through desert times. Our lives can become dried out through the pain we encounter through sin, illness, or loss.
Our lives can become dried out through the pain of losing someone. As we quickly approach the holiday season, this truth becomes even more real. We remember our loved ones no longer with us; praying the holiday season will quickly pass and the pain of our desert will ease. We long for the streams in the desert.

The pain of desert times speaks with the endless reality of debt, loss of income, and empty cupboards. Like the Israelites who had lost their city, taking with it means of income, food, and shelter, we too live through times of economic uncertainty. While we hear all the time that money should not control our lives, inevitably the reality of living in the red makes it shadows more prominent as the bills come in. It is during those times that the sands of the desert sting our eyes, making it impossible to see past the pain.

Broken relationships, painful illness, depression, substance abuse…all of these situations have their real effect on the lives of God’s people. We all live through the dry times making our thirst more overpowering and leading us to long for relief.

Life can certainly be like a desert. Pain can lead us to paths that look much like the Saharan desert. Paths that are long, hot, and unending. Life leads us to places were God seems far away; to places where we feel alone, afraid, where love feels far off, were relief shows no sign of coming. We become the Israelites, living through times were our world feels like it has been burned away, leaving us with no place to call home; faced with only our sin and a message of judgment upon us.

The promise we hear for the Israelite people is the same promise that has been made real in our own lives. Where the deserts exist, stream will flow. Where there is only sand, flowers and plants will bloom. The eyes of the blind shall be opened, the ears of the deaf unstopped. The lame shall leap, the tongue of the speechless will sing for joy.

God makes a beautiful garden in the deserts of our lives. The message to the Israelites was made real in the Messiah, Jesus Christ. Christ came to the people whose lives had become like the desert. He healed his people such as the young child overcome by a demon. He made the lame to walk, the deaf to hear, the blind to see. Jesus came to bring blooming gardens to the desert hearts. Healing physical ailments, bringing a message of love to the prostitutes, providing a second chance to thieves and tax collectors.

Jesus came to redeem all, making a highway of grace in the hearts that had become sand. Just as Jesus’ coming brought streams to the broken hearts in his lifetime, so he continues to heal today. When Jesus is alive in our lives, when the spirit moves in us, there are streams brought to the desert.

In our baptisms, we were washed with the waters of healing, cleansing the desert of captivity to sin and offering us a message of hope and grace. We were brought into this new and lush garden of the body of Christ. Water cleansed us. The spirit of God, the living water, lives inside us. It opens a gateway to hope.

The call for us in this passage is a call to new possibilities. It is the call to take those parts of our lives that are living in the desert sands, and reimagining how the streams of living water can bring us healing and hope. One of the most difficult things the Israelites faced was moving beyond living in the grief of their captivity and into a place awakening new hope and possibility. They had to move beyond the place of asking why this happened and into a place of asking what they could do to make the desert bloom.

God is calling us to take the things that weigh us down, turning them into new possibilities to proclaim God’s grace. To take our deserts and bring streams of living water, to create new opportunities in places we once considered dry clay.

In our gospel lesson, we hear of a woman who wouldn’t take no for an answer. She knew Jesus could make her daughter well. She was persistant, she was patient, she knew Jesus could take this desert pain and bring living water. She knew Jesus could and would heal her.

This is our call; to be patient, to be persistent, to see how the places that are dried up in our own lives, in our own church, in our own family, and in our own community; how these places can be awakened and made alive through the living water given to us through a gracious and loving Messiah. For as is promised in Isaiah, when the Messiah comes, there will be streams in the desert. Amen.

Sermon on Unity

2009-08-22T10:02:00.000-07:00

Our Gospel reading for this week offers us an invitation. We, God’s people, are invited to feast. Last week, we heard the earlier part of this reading, which began for us this great invitation. We are invited to the meal of eternal life, to eat of Jesus’ body and to drink of his blood in the elements of bread and wine. Here, Jesus invites us to the meal that proclaims and offers God’s grace.

This week, we, the ELCA, have been sharing in the National Assembly. During this assembly, we have offered invitations again. They were invitations extended to others to fully participate in sharing ministry within the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America.

One particular invitation that was accepted with a 95% majority is about sharing in a full communion agreement with the United Methodist Church. The process of which began back in 1977. Over the years, we have been in discussion with them about our similarities and our differences. Our focus has not been on what divides us, but what brings us together.

Probably the greatest hurdle this process has faced is what we encounter here in today’s Gospel reading. In the Methodist tradition, Holy Communion is celebrated as a memorial; a remembrance of Christ’s sacrifice. The tradition does not teach that the bread and the wine are literally Christ’s body and blood. Rather, it is a time to eat of this meal like they did in the Last Supper, and to prayerfully remember Christ’s death.

In the Lutheran tradition, we teach that indeed, the bread and the wine are Christ’s body and blood. The meal has Christ’s real presence over, under, and through it. We teach that through the elements and the Word proclaimed, Christ is truly present in the meal. As in the greek word for eat in the John text translates; we are gnawing on Jesus’ body. It is truly his body and blood, allowing Christ to abide in us. How, we do not know. As Luther stated, it is one of the great mysteries of our faith.

While these differences are indeed great in our understanding of Holy Communion, we are now in this relationship of full communion. What this means for our relationship with the Methodist church is that ministers can share in leading worship at one another’s congregations. This is something that has been evidenced for many years at Simpson Temple in Altoona. Two Lutheran and United Methodist congregation came together to have one pastor. At the moment it is an ELCA minister. The next pastor will be United Methodist. The two congregations are now one; they worship together, serve together, acting as one Christian body.

The call we hear in today’s readings is one that speaks to the invitation we have in this Full Communion agreement. It is the call to come together as Christ’s body and to share in the meal that offers God’s grace. It is the banquet feast, where we can eat of the bread and drink of the wine that proclaims the Good News of eternal life to all.

God’s body throughout the world comes together at this meal. We come bearing our differences in belief about what the elements in Communion are. We come bearing our sin and the weight of our burdens, ready and eager for the words of forgiveness that are proclaimed. And we come united, even in our differences, reawakening us to our unity as God’s children.

This is the great gift of the Gospel; that through Christ, we are united. The invitation is extended to all people even in our differences and brings us together as God’s creation. We are called to come together as one with people of all faiths, ethnicities, age, orientation, class, gender… We come together with those we are angry with, and those we do not know. We are brought together not because we want to or because we like the people sitting next to us. No, we come together because of the one who calls us, Jesus Christ.

We come to the table because we have been invited. We come as honored guests who, while completely undeserving, are fed and nourished through the sacrifice of a loving and gracious God. It is why we call this meal a means of grace. Because the one who loves us more than we could ever love ourselves wants to nourish us through this heavenly meal with his word and grace; strengthening and equipping us to do the work of his kingdom.

To pray for others
To forgive our neighbor
To love stronger
To open the door to another
To share God’s love to someone
To invite all to Christ’s meal

This message of invitation is one that feeds the hungry and strengthens the weak. Prior to our John reading, Jesus had fed the 5,000. Here, as he gives the message to eat of his body and drink of his blood, he is speaking again to the same crowd. He is telling them that indeed, their stomachs were filled through the loaves and fish, but he is offering them something more. He is inviting them to feast on the meal that has no end. Christ has the words of eternal life and is calling us to be united with one another in a meal that will sustain them in all times and in all places. It is the meal that they eat of and never grow hungry. It is the drink that will cause them to never be thirsty.

While they may not understand how, and while the idea of eating his flesh and drinking his blood may seem offensive, God calls them out of their current understanding and into paths yet untrodden. They are to break away from what they think they understand and delve into this great feast of God’s grace.

In Communion, we walk up divided by our differences only to be united as one. As we approach the end of the ELCA Churchwide Assembly, we can be in prayer that this will be the proclamation made about our relationship with the Methodist church and all of God’s children. That indeed, our differences will not divide us but will rather unite us. As we face questions on matters of sexuality, HIV/AIDS funding, evangelism, and all other issues we have heard about through the churchwide agenda, we are called to pray for the each other as the Christian body.

After the vote on sexuality at synod assembly, Presiding Bishop Mark Hanson offered these words: “We meet one another finally, not in our agreements or our disagreements, but at the foot of the cross -- where God is faithful, where Christ is present with us, and where, by the power of the Holy Spirit, we are one in Christ."

While we have our differences, one thing remains the same. We certainly will always face our differences as the church, but our unity in Christ never wavers. We are the body of Christ, united through his death and resurrection. The invitation to the meal will always be extended, allowing our differences to wash away as we share in the flesh that is true food and the blood that is true drink. Thanks be to God. Amen.

Independence Day Sermon

2009-07-04T14:18:00.000-07:00

A few years ago, there was a special series on A & E about young men discerning whether to enter the Priesthood. I found this show fascinating as it caused me to reflect back on my own journey of discernment when coming to seminary.

The young men were rather extreme with their discernment. One carried a life sized cross miles and miles down an old country road. Another was in the midst of college and spent much of his time speaking with priests, family, and friends about whether this was the right thing to do. His family had always pushed him to enter the priesthood.

One young man who particularly stood out for me decided to make a type of pilgrimage. He left everything he had back at home and journeyed through several states, depending solely upon the generosity of others. He had no real plan, other than his destination would be a Catholic church in another state. Throughout his journey, he had to depend on strangers hospitality. He would share his story with them, with the hopes they would provide for his basic needs: foods, clothing, shelter, even transportation. He carried nothing with him. All he had was the clothes on his back and faith that God’s people would provide what he needed.

This young man on this journey was striving to live out our Gospel text for this Sunday which speaks to Jesus’ call for the twelve. He sent them out, two by two, with only the bare basics. He ordered them to take nothing for their journey except a staff; no bread, no bag, no money in their belts; but to wear sandals and not to put on two tunics. Jesus called for them to live with the bare necessities and to trust that their needs would be met through the kindness of strangers.

It is interesting that this text should show up this week. We have just celebrated as a country our Independence Day; a day in which we remember the sacrifices others gave on our behalf so that we may be a free country. It is a weekend we remember the gift we have in being able to raise our families in a country where we can get an education, where we can vote, where we can worship freely.

It is indeed interesting that this text falls on Independence Day weekend, when the call we are given here in Mark is the pure opposite of independence. In this Gospel reading, Jesus is calling us to a pure dependence; dependence upon not only God but our neighbors. Here, the disciples are told to leave everything they have behind and live in a way that is dependent upon the hospitality of the children of God.

Jesus is calling us to move out of our own comfort zones and into a life that is dependent upon Christ and Christ’s body. We are called to be witnesses, which literally in the Greek means truth tellers. We are to be the ones who tell the whole truth in word and deed, that Jesus Christ has come into this world for the salvation of all people. We are to fulfill the mission given to us in baptism, being dependent upon God and God’s people providing for our needs, in turn bringing the Body of Christ closer together.

We are to be truth tellers whether or not the people will listen. Everyone here today knows how difficult it is to proclaim the Gospel when others do not seem to care to listen. As a congregation, it has been many years since St. Luke was filled to the brim with people. Our community can at times feel burned out and too tired to hear or experience God’s Word lived out. At times one can wonder where God is in the midst of the suffering people that surround us.

And yet here we are, called to be truth tellers no matter if people will listen. We are called to be faithful proclaimers of the Gospel even if people scoff, even if people get angry with us, even if people walk away. We are to be faithful proclaimers of the Good News, inviting people to church, reaching out when they are in need, voicing God’s love for them even if they struggle to love themselves. And if they don’t listen, we simply shake the dust from our sandals and move on.

God has called us to move beyond ourselves and into a world of need. We are to move beyond our own wants, hurts, and desires and to see those whose suffering is greater than our own. We cannot live solely for ourselves as individuals or even ourselves as the body of St. Luke. We are to see the wider church within Mt. Union, within Huntingdon and Mifflin County, beyond the borders of the Allegheny Synod and into the world. We are to be visionaries, always looking for new ways in which our Redeeming God is calling us to serve.

We are called to take the risk that God has prepared us to do, what God has called us to do. We are to love. Love beyond what our minds can cognitively grasp. It is the unconditional, unyielding love that breaks down all walls and barriers. It is the redeeming love of God lived out in the body of Christ. It is the love that calls us to mission in the baptismal waters. It is love that is in the bread and the wine that nourishes and strengthens us in our journey. It is the love that leads us to leave our worldliness behind and to live out the Gospel in its purist state.

There are so many ways in which God is calling us to serve. We are to serve in the ways we have been for years; through providing quilts to those in need of physical comfort, in providing meals to those seniors in our community in need of food and fellowship. Through the foodbank, through the pregnancy center, through the outreach we offer as we generously give of our time and talents throughout the week.

And then there are new ways, ways yet to be discovered. God is always calling us to grow in our vision and in our outreach. We are to be dependent upon each other and our neighbors whose needs may be greater than our own. The call for us is to come together, to meet the needs of others and to have our own needs met. It is the call for us to be united as God’s children, striving to proclaim the Good News and to grow stronger in our faith and outreach.

As I think back on the young man who left everything behind as he made his pilgrimage, I cannot help but think of all the people who reached out to him. It is easy to think of all the walls people build up. I for one worried as this young man began his pilgrimage as I didn’t think many people would open themselves to reaching out. Yet so many people did. Everything this young man needed God provided through his children. Total strangers, all with different backgrounds: young, old, rich, poor, black, white….they all reached out to help this young man.

What this story made me realize is the great potential we have as a community. To continue growing in our faith, in our outreach, in our love, and in our dependence upon each other. God has called us into a life of dependence upon Christ and Christ’s body within the world. May we recognize together the ways in which we need each other and the ways in which we can reach out to those in need. Thanks be to God. Amen.

Hi/Lo Thursday

2009-03-26T07:30:00.000-07:00

This post is part of "Hi/Lo Thursday" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check out their blog to read everyone else's "Hi/Lo" posts and get your link on their site.

For months now, i've been looking at all these cool options for things to write about on my blog. Nothing really ever stood out for me as I didn't feel the options really applied to my life. I mean truly, my is pretty mundane at the moment (praise God). Yet, I do have hi's and lo's so figured i'd give this a shot! We'll see how well I keep up with it. *smile*

HI: I am so escatic to say that Jamie, my sister, is coming into town today. She will be here for a month long visit. Being so far away from family can be very difficult. I've always been very close to them and living on the other side of the country is not ideal. I certainly feel called to minister in central PA but it does come with sacrifices. I miss being able to eat dinner with them, go to movies, have Sunday morning breakfast... all of those normal things we so often take for granted.

I love the fact that Jamie is able to take off so much time to visit. A week, two weeks...it just isn't enough to really see one another. I love that with these long visits we don't have to pile all the fun stuff into a short period of time. We can be normal, have our space, and enjoy each others company. Plus, she can take my dog out on walks to give me a break! Always a gift.

We have so many fun activities planned while she is here. I'm excited she will be here for Holy Week to celebrate Easter with me. We are planning on going to a musical and are also going to try and fit a couple overnight camping trips in. My work schedule is packed, but with lots of fun activities she can join in on. This is definitely my high of the week. Please pray for safe travels for Jamie today. She is going through Colorado which is expecting a major snow storm. May she be blessed with a safe flight and a speedy trip.

LO: It is hard to come up with a Lo when i'm so excited to have Jamie coming in. I guess for this week it would be my headaches. I've struggle with chronic headaches since I fractured my jaw as a child. When I had the car accident in January my back and neck were affected and now the headaches are much stronger. Chiropractic care has helped, but they are currently out of town. It's been a week since I saw them and my head is reacting. I'm praying my neck calms down and i'm able to enjoy this weekend of ministry and time with my sister.

Alright, there is my HI/LO for the week! Hopefully i'll remember each thursday to do this; it was kind of fun!

Prayers for Stellan

2009-03-24T18:12:00.000-07:00

There are so many kiddos out there who are struggling right now. As you know, I run the prayer website Asher and Jacob's Friends and every day there are dozens who are facing a new battle. While little Stellan is not on our Friends list, I do follow his Mama's blog and pray for their family. At the moment, Stellan is fighting to get a healthy heart rhythm and the situation is critical. His family is asking for everyone to spread the word of the need for prayer so that is what i'm doing. Please, drop what you are doing, head to his site, and say a prayer for him. And while your at it, please stop by Asher and Jacob's Friends and pray for the other children in need. There are many who are facing life and death situations as i'm writing this.

Creepy or Awesome....You Decide

2009-03-24T16:33:00.000-07:00

Would you eat this???

Noah Sermon

2009-03-20T20:58:00.000-07:00

I thought I would share a sermon I preached a couple weeks ago. Not the best one i've preached, but the Gospel nonetheless which is always a good thing. :) I will attempt to start posting more if you would like.

It is the typical Sunday school lesson. I sat and watched as a class of preschoolers learned about Noah and the ark. They sang and did motions to the “Rise and Shine, Arky Arky” song. They marched two by two throughout the classroom pretending to board the ark. They also finger painted together an ark, then adding different animals to it. It remained displayed in the classroom for the rest of the year.

I think many of us here today can remember such Sunday school lessons. It is one of the first stories children learn when they begin attending class. For many years, Noah and the ark has actually been one of the top selling nursery decorating kits. I remember when a good friend of mine was pregnant, it was her top choice. When we went to Baby’s ‘R Us, there was a huge section just for this design. There were cute animals, all two by two lining the shelves with beautiful rainbows and arks as the backdrop. It was sweeter than a chocolate chip cookie.

I remember the first time I heard this story as an adult. You see, even as a child who never went to Sunday school, I still new the story from television and my children’s books. But when I heard it as an adult, it seemed a very different version. It was dark, violent, scary to say the least. It perplexed me as to how such a difficult Bible story could become so soft and sweet.

Our lesson from Genesis is this dark and difficult story. It is one that is violent, God’s near genocide of the human race. It is one that calls us to see our sin, to recognize the dirt and filth of our behavior and our hearts. It is also, however, a lesson of how even in the midst of that, God chooses to offer us hope.

When we hear the story of Noah, it can make one uneasy. God is portrayed as an angry God, seeing good only in one family, in essence one man. God desired to wipe away the rest of the human race as we were full of sin and were useless in the eyes of the creator. The idea that the God we know now, the God who sacrificed himself on the cross at one point felt it necessary to cleanse the world and start over is something that is almost uncomprehensible. Yet it is what happened.

The focus of this story however, is not on the violence that can become so central. It is not a story to liven up fear in our hearts and minds, knowing that if God chose to do it again God could. No, the focus is on the covenant. It is on the fact that God chose to reject the ways of violence, giving up the method of flooding the world as a way of dealing with the evil that was so prevalent; instead giving us a covenant for all people.

The word covenant in the Hebrew language is berith. It is a word that means a contract, or better suited for this context to mean a promise. God gave us a covenant promise which was binding and would not be broken, stating that the ways of violence had ended in dealing with human sin. Rather than washing us through the waters of a flood God would wash us through the redeeming waters of baptism.

We see this promise lived out in our Gospel lesson. Jesus is first baptized with the Holy Spirit and proceeds out into the desert for forty days and nights. It is during this time that he is tested by Satan. Time and time again in the desert, Jesus is given opportunities to live out being the Messiah people expected. We hear more of this in Matthew. Jesus could have been the warrior Messiah, living for himself, commanding the world to do exactly as he chose. He could have ruled with power and violence, ridding everything of evil and making things exactly as he wanted. He could have given in to temptation, but he did not.

God would rather grieve the sin in this world than break the covenant promise given. Instead of wiping out sin in ways I could imagine would be easier for God, we are given a God who suffers death on the cross for our sake. Jesus embodies a new way of dealing with evil, one that is sacrificial, redemptive, and demonstrates to the world a suffering love. All for our sake.

The rainbow and the cross are truly intertwined. They demonstrate to us the covenant promise of God; one that chooses to take on the suffering of the world for our sake. We are blessed with a loving God who chooses us, who willingly grieves our sin and yet loves and forgives us nonetheless.

In this season of Lent, we live in the tension between the two: the rainbow and the cross. On Ash Wednesday, we began this journey. We entered with a promise of what is to come. It is the covenant promise that is the rainbow, guiding us along this forty day journey. On Ash Wednesday, we were reminded of why God flooded the world. We were reminded of our sin, our mortality, of our need for repentance. Even in that reminder, even with the ashes smudged on our foreheads, we still had that light, we still had the rainbow. We had the reminder that indeed, even as we walk this journey through the wilderness the covenant promise remains. God does not care for us through violence but through sacrificial love.

We are on this journey from the rainbow and to the cross. A journey that takes us through a time to walk through the wilderness, smudged with ashes remembering why we need a loving God. As we cross through this desert, we are to take time to meditate on the grief that God experiences for our sake. God chose to shed tears on our behalf giving us the flooding waters of baptism instead. God chooses us out of love; a love deeper, wider, greater than anything we can imagine.

This is why it is imperative for us to know the story of Noah. Not the story we see on the walls of nursery’s or hear in the words of the children’s songs. No, it is time we hear the story as it is meant to be; with the violence, with the heartache. It is time to hear it for its redemptive power. The rainbow’s significance is far more important than its visual beauty. For it is a reminder that God chooses not to take the easy way out. God chooses to grieve, God chooses to love, and God chooses to redeem. Thanks be to God. Amen

Disney, Part II: A Unique Meetup

2009-03-19T19:15:00.000-07:00

On our first day after we rested and got unpacked a bit, we decided to head on over to Downtown Disney. This was an extra-special trip, as our Aunt and Uncle from Utah would be in town! As it turns out, our trips overlapped by one day. Jamie and I had last seen them about 5 years prior, but Brenda hadn't seen them in over 15 years! So, this was a really cool opportunity to visit even if only for a few hours.

When we arrived, they were still out at Gator World (still makes me crack up ) so we had some time to kill. We visited a few shops and ended up buying things. I had promised myself I would have some restraint until the end of the trip, but that lasted only a few minutes! We loved the Christmas store and probably spent more money there than any other that day.

After around an hour, it was time for our visit!
My Aunt and Uncle don't look happy in the picture but I promise, the evening was filled with smiles and laughs!
Here's another picture of the three sisters in front of Stitch. I so wish Brenda or Jamie would have been spit on (Stitch spits water)!

We decided to ditch our original plans for Earl of Sandwich and went with T-Rex. You can read more about the food in my Dining Review, but I will say it's yummy food and the perfect atmosphere for Dino lovers!

Here's a picture from the inside of the restaurant:

After that, it was a few more shops. Jamie wasn't feeling well after her long, drawn out day of delays on the plane so she went back early. Brenda and I did a few more shops and then decided to call it an evening. It was a great first day and we couldn't wait to receive our wake up call and head out to the Magic Kingdom (or as Jamie says, "The Magical Kingdom)!

New Button!

2009-03-19T19:05:00.000-07:00

I plan to post about our Disney trip tonight, but before I do I wanted to highlight a new feature on this site. I have created a new button for Asher and Jacob's Friends. While it is not the fanciest button in the world, it is a great way to bring awareness to families in need. If you are willing, please copy and paste the code found to your right and post it on your blog. The more people we bring to the site, hopefully the more prayers will go out to these amazing families.

Thank you!

Beginning of my trip report. Part 1!!

2009-02-28T10:52:00.000-08:00

If any of you remember, I began a pre-trip report on the DIS boards. I never really completed it but have started a trip report I plan to finish, I promise! As I post over there I will copy it over to hear. I hope you enjoy hearing about our trip. The beginning of this is very similar to my pre-trip but I thought I would include it as it has pictures.

So, before I go any further, I shall introduce you to the crew:

Me (Laura): I am a 28 year old newby Lutheran pastor living in Pennsylvania. It has been my dream for many, many years to go to Disneyworld. Life has been a bit chaotic lately with some major transitions and personal struggles. This trip was important to me for so many reasons. Relaxation, connecting with my sisters, being a kid again, seeing the mouse... it doesn't get any better!

Brenda: Brenda is my 31 year old sister. She is an amazing person that I really do look up to. She lives in Alaska and works in pediatric home health. Brenda is overdue for a real vacation and is counting down the days with us. I regularly receive phone calls and emails about things she discovers she wants to do. While Jamie and I weren't totally on board, Brenda was ready for T&T (tower of terror)!!

Jamie: Jamie, our baby sister, is 23 years old. She, like Brenda, is my best friend and confidant. She lives in Seattle at the moment and is a dedicated volunteer at the Children's Hospital. During her most recent visit, she helped me build a trip plan which we will of course share with you. Jamie has held on to the excitement of this trip from my first crazy vision and helped me count down the days. Her #1 goal was to ride Dumbo, and she didn't care if people thought she looked silly doing so! I must admit, I was right there with her!

Arrival Day:

Since we live all over the country, our arrivals varied depending on our flights. Poor Brenda had a twelve hour flight from Anchorage, Alaska. Thankfully her original flight was changed so she ended up arriving the day before Jamie and I. We booked her a room at the Pop so she was able to recover with a good nights sleep before we started with all our exciting plans.

Jamie and I were scheduled to arrive in Orlando at the same time. We organized it this way so we could take the magical express together. This was amazing as I was coming from Baltimore and she was coming from Seattle. Thrilled does not even begin to describe how we felt about being able to do this together!

Well.... as we all know with the wonderful world of flying, nothing ever goes as planned. Jamie's flight got delayed and then delayed some more. No, this had nothing to do with weather. It didn't even have to do with a mechanical. The problem was the crew was late. Like, really late. By the time they had arrived, Jamie's connecting flight in Houston would be impossible to catch. Then, to top it all off, they had to de-ice the plane but had no de-icer. Seriously. So, by the time Jamie arrived in Orlando, she was tired, not feeling good, and just wanted to chill. Really, who could blame her?! If it had been me, I would have been a crabby, nasty mess. Not the way she (or we) wanted to start off, but she handled it like a champ.

I, on the other hand, had a fantastic flight. My plane even ended up arriving 30 minutes early much to my delight. The weather in Pennsylvania was snowy and gloomy so the sun of Florida was exactly what I was craving! While there was a chill in the air, it still felt like a glorious spring day!

I couldn't of been more excited to see this:

We all found the Magical Express a wonderful way to begin our vacation. The video added to the excitement. So, we were all off on our way to the happiest place on earth! So exciting to see exit signs with Disney on them!
Through the gate, we're there!
While not the best picture, can you tell we were excited about arriving. You wouldn't believe how many pictures the three of us have combined of ones just like this. With three separate bus trips, it's a little nuts! Since Brenda had checked in the night before, Jamie and I both did not have to even worry about it. Our Travel Agent worked it out to where Brenda would be assigned the same room we would have the rest of the trip, even though it was booked outside of our package deal. Our TA was truly amazing and I would recommend her to anyone else in a heartbeat!

Here's the check-in area I didn't have to worry about! Sorry it's so dark, it's not the best lit area.

While we had requested the 80's building of the hotel, we were upgraded to a preferred room. We were a little bummed until we saw how close we would be to the main building. It was great and oh so convenient. Plus, we had a nice view of the lake and it was SO quiet! Our room was in the 60's Playdoh building. So fun!

Our building:
View from the stairs/elevator; so cute!
Hallway leading to our room: Such a great room!

The view. Those old creepy looking buildings are the classic year unfinished buildings. Construction stopped after 9/11. There is talk that they are now turning them into family suites. We could see the lights from Hollywood Studios and fireworks from Fantasmic. Pretty cool!

Our very messy room. I forgot to get pics prior to our packing. Oops!

Few Pictures

2009-02-25T15:16:00.001-08:00

I'm on my way to the Ash Wednesday service, but thought i'd share a few pictures. More to come!

2009-02-01T06:03:00.000-08:00

Hello All,

I apologize for the long stretch between updates. Disney World was fabulous! I'm really sick with a fairly severe case of an upper respiratory flu so am not able to give you a real update right now. When all the meds the doc gave start to work I will give you all the "magical" details of our trip.

Hope you are all doing well; I will be back soon!

Advent Conspiracy

2008-12-07T14:44:00.000-08:00

I saw this video today and found it to be very thought-provoking. Thought you might enjoy "chewing" on it like I am! Don't forget to turn off the music before clicking on the video. :)

Can't quite explain it

2008-11-25T15:09:00.000-08:00

Today I spent the afternoon delivering poinsettias to the shut in's at one of my congregations. This is something I had been looking forward to and enjoyed it so much. They really have wonderful stories to tell and tremendous wisdom to share.

What was odd is that as I went along, this burning sensation started under my nose and on my left eyelid. It got worse and worse and now as I sit here it is driving me insane!!!!

I'm assuming I may have an allergy to poinsettias? Is that possible and would these be "normal" symptoms? I'm totally baffled...

Please, share your thoughts and home remedies. At this point, i'll try anything!!!

Do I follow you?

2008-11-24T20:28:00.000-08:00

Hello friends,

If you check on this blog, let me know by clicking on the "follow me" section to the right. That way I can check out your blog and get to know you better. It's always nice to know who's checking on on my infrequent (though may be more frequent posts)!

Thanksgiving Sermon

2008-11-23T13:32:00.000-08:00

It has been quite a while since I posted a sermon. I am thinking I may need to be more intentional about sharing them with you! Here is the sermon I will be preaching tonight at the community Thanksgiving service. I think it still needs some tweaking, but here you go!

Two years ago, our family celebrated a miracle. It was a thanksgiving unlike any we had or probably will ever experience again. We celebrated a day which we were told would never happen. Statistics showed we had a mere 10% chance of ever reaching it. It was a miracle; he is a miracle.

Two years, six months, and 1 week ago, my twin nephews were born. They arrived 15 weeks, 4 days early and were around 1lb 5 oz each. Doctors shared over and over again with their parents the grim statistics. If Jacob and Asher did survive, according to some medical professionals, their lives would be miserable and without quality. They would face complication after complication, without the ability to function in normal society. That was the language used by the doctors; their parents let it go in one ear and out the other.

From the moment they were born, we celebrated the miracle of their lives. We prayed, we journaled their milestones and the heartaches on their online journal. We knew the boys were God’s creation and desired to share their story with the world. As Jacob’s kidney function began to cease, we prayed. We prayed and we asked others to do the same. We cried when his urine output stopped, we rejoiced when it would start again. On June 29th of that year, we weeped as this 7 week 2 day old little boy took his last breaths. And we remembered with pride the life that was lived, and the literally thousands of people throughout the world touched by his story.

Asher continued to battle hard for his life. On the day of Jacob’s funeral he almost died. We were told we were just going in circles and he wouldn’t live. And yet, he continued to fight. At 5 months Asher came off the ventilator for the first time. At 5 ½ months he went onto nasal cannula. And, at 6 months 1week old, little Asher came home with an oxygen tank, ostomy bag, and his saturation monitor. It was a lot of equipment for such a tiny person; yet he was home. Two years later, we are still celebrating and giving thanks to God for this incredible miracle that is Asher.

This Sunday evening, we hear the story of the ten lepers. It is a story which demonstrates to us God’s unyielding grace and mercy towards all people. In the time in which this was written, an encounter with ten lepers would not have been an unusual site. The difference with this group, however, was one was a foreign, a Samaritan. It was a mixed group, nine being Jews and one being a Gentile.

When Jesus sent the group to the Jewish priests, the Samaritan must have felt Jesus was a bit crazy. The likelihood of him being accepted was slim, and yet he went. In his unyielding desire to be healed from this horrible disease, he went and demonstrated faith. And now he was cleansed; he was healed. Something he had hoped for for so long was now coming to pass. He could now imagine life from a whole new point of view. After being despised and considered unclean for so long, he could see himself having a future. A future filled with hope, a future with work, friends, a family. What else could he do but give thanksgiving to his healer, his savior, his God?

This Samaritan, this social outcast, who had two things going against him as a Gentile and a leper, returned to prostrate himself and praise Jesus. While the other lepers certainly could have been praising God on their way to and from the Temple, the Samaritan is the only one who makes the connection. He connects praising God and thanking Jesus. He saw the human Jesus is the power of God.

Faith is found in the response of Thanksgiving. It is the ability to see what can’t be seen- to believe the unbelievable. Faith is to praise God at the feet of Jesus, to see the power of God at the foot of the cross.

There are many times in our lives where we do not desire to offer our thanks and praise to God. When sweet little Jacob passed from his mother’s arms, it was difficult, nearly impossible, to see the good in his death. While we were thankful to God for the life that had been lived, the heartache and despair clouded any goodness that could be found. Jacob had died, and his mother was left with empty arms.

In both verses 14 and 15 of this text, we hear the word “seeing”. Jesus saw the lepers and in response sent them to the priests. Then, the Samaritan saw that he had been made well. The word “seeing”’ in this context means more than simply physical sight. It means to both recognize the opportunity to be merciful to another, and to recognize that God’s mercy has touched one’s life.

This text calls us to see the opportunities before us. Jesus calls us to recognize those in need of God’s mercy. To surround people like Jacob’s mother with the love and mercy that can only come from the Holy Spirit dwelling in the body of Christ. It calls us out of our comfort to be God’s hands and feet to all people, even those society would label as the unclean.

Jesus also calls us to see God’s mercy in our own lives. In the midst of our sorrow and despair, in the midst of the stressors in our lives and the depression that can cloud our judgment. God is there with us, extending the mercy and healing that only Christ can bring. It is the healing and grace that may not always come in the way we would like it to, but yet it still comes.

Our sweet little Jacob was not healed in the way we desired. We wanted so badly for that amazing little boy to stay with us, to grow up alongside his brother. We wanted to cuddle with him, to hear his little voice, to watch his first steps, to see him grow. Our hearts longed for that miracle. And yet, we know God’s mercy was there. We know Jacob was healed. And so we do thank God. We thank God for the life that was lived, and we thank God for the healing that took place. Hearts are still broken but we know that God is good.

The question for us, on this Thanksgiving celebration, is how do we see Christ’s mercy, and how do we respond? In the midst of the craziness of this world, when do we stop to recognize the love and grace that Jesus has to offer us? What do we do when we see? Truly, gratitude, thanksgiving, is the purest measure of our character and spiritual condition. It is the ability to see beyond ourselves and to recognize Christ living in our midst.

I personally never fully understood the point of Thanksgiving Day. While I understood the story of the pilgrims, why we eat turkey, and so forth, it lacked that spiritual dimension. It wasn’t until two years ago when Asher came home that I understood. I realized that indeed, Thanksgiving is an opportunity for us to intentionally set aside and give thanks and praise to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for having mercy upon us. It is a time for us to acknowledge that while we were still yet sinners, God made us saints through Christ’s death and resurrection. The Holy Spirit is active and alive in this Christian body, and God’s mercy continues to reach out to us in awesome and unexpected ways.

Martin Luther, the German Reformer, shares his thoughts on God’s provision in his explanation of the 1st article of the creed in the small catechism. He states:
I believe that God has created me and all that exists.God has given me and still preserves my body and soulwith all their powers.God provides me with food and clothing, home and family,daily work, and all I need from day to day.God also protects me in time of danger and guards me from every evil.All this God does out of fatherly and divine goodness and mercy,though I do not deserve it.Therefore I surely ought to thank and praise, serve and obey God.This is most certainly true.

This Thanksgiving, we can give thanks and praise to our Lord and Savior, as he is indeed merciful and will continue to provide. While we will continue to face the hardships that come with our journeys through life, God is present, God is merciful, and we will have opportunity after opportunity to give thanks. And for this we can say, thanks be to God. Amen.

My addiction...

2008-11-20T19:19:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I know i've been away from this blog for almost a month. I can't believe it has been that long; I guess that comes with the craziness that is a pastor's life!

As I have mentioned before, I have been busily planning the big Disney trip coming up in less than two months (woo hoo)! One of the addictions I built towards the beginning of my planning was the DIS boards (http://www.disboards.com/). This is a great forum site that if you are planning a trip I highly recommend. Lots of great wisdom, pictures, and fun stuff can be found here. It helped me in determining where we would stay and what restaurants to eat at. I have also made many great online friends there.

One of the things many people do is offer up their pre-trip reports. I decided to begin joining in this fun. As I haven't updated you in a while, I thought I might share some of my entries. My report is entitled: "Three Alaskans hit the world...watch out for the glare!":

Part I:
Alright, so i've buckled and have decided to do a pre-trip report. I'm just so excited for the trip, I must do something with my Disney fanatacism, even if no one reads this!

So a little background:

As a child, it was a tradition in our family to drive our little Honda Accord from Seattle (where we lived at the time) on down to California most summers. Over the years, we visited Disneyland about four times. From the second my cute little feet stepped on to Disney property, I was addicted.

In 1994, my mother, two sisters and I packed up our bags and headed for the wild's of Alaska. This ended our Disney trips and we haven't been back since. Total heartbreak...

Fast forward to adulthood... In 2003, I entered my Master's program to become a pastor. This was something I never thought I would do and stepping into this future role was a major commitment. In the midst of my anxiety and fear, I made a promise to myself. "Laura, if you finish this program, you can take yourself and your sisters to Disneyworld." I hung on to this promise throughout my four year program.

In August 2006, I called my sisters and asked them if they would want to go with me to WDW. Of course they both said "yes" but didn't take it too seriously. I wouldn't graduate from Seminary until May 2008, and we wouldn't even be going until January 2009. Yet, I stayed committed and the family kind of chuckled as I began making plans.

So, before I go any further, I shall introduce you to the cast:

Me (Laura): I am a 28 year old newby Lutheran pastor living in Pennsylvania. It has been my dream for many, many years to go to Disneyworld. Life has been a bit chaotic lately with some major transitions and personal struggles. This trip is important to me for so many reasons. Relaxation, connecting with my sisters, being a kid again, seeing the mouse... it doesn't get any better!

Brenda: Brenda is my 31 year old sister. She is an amazing person that I really do look up to. She lives in Alaska and works in pediatric home health. Brenda is overdue for a real vacation and is counting down the days with us. I regularly receive phone calls and emails about things she discovers she wants to do. While Jamie and I aren't totally on board, Brenda is ready for T&T (tower of terror)!!

Jamie: Jamie, our baby sister, is 23 years old. She, like Brenda, is my best friend and confidant. She lives in Seattle at the moment and is a dedicated volunteer at the Children's Hospital. During her most recent visit, she helped me build a trip plan which we will of course share with you. Jamie has held on to the excitement of this trip from my first crazy vision and is counting down the days. Her #1 goal is to ride Dumbo, and she doesn't care if people thinks she looks silly doing so! I must admit, i'm right there with her!

More to come so stay tuned....

Part II: Choosing Time and Location..What to do, what to do!

In the midst of the chaos that comes with senior year, I began some of my planning. I found the DIS about a month into it and became seriously addicted. I mean, really, this site needs a recovery program!!!

I started sorting through all the reviews, articles, websites, etc on where to stay and what a good size trip would be. There is so much info out there it felt very overwhelming at times.

I decided that if we were going to go all the way to Florida, we might as well give ourselves time to relax a bit. I watched packages fluctuate in price to determine when would be best to go and when would be best to attempt purchasing one. After a great deal of discernment, I decided we should go in January for 8 days. This seemed reasonable and enough time to enjoy ourselves. Almost a year later, I went a little nutty and added another day; I just couldn't help myself!

In regards to our resort, it wasn't a difficult decision to stay on property. While I recognize it costs a bit more, the perks were just too much to pass up. Plus I couldn't stand the idea of commuting.

At first, we thought about staying in ASMo (All Star Movies). We wanted something Disneyish and that wouldn't send my pocketbook through the roof. All three of us were excited over the characters throughout and thought it would be for us.

As I read more and more reviews however (thanks DIS), I began looking seriously at the Pop Century. At first I was turned off to it as it didn't seem Disney enough for me. When we looked further into it, I saw how it integrated Disney with Pop culture. I now love the theming at Pop, as do my sisters. We know it isn't the most exciting building, we love the 80's building and have requested it. For us, it really is our decade and we think that's pretty special.

Part III: How in the world am I going to afford this???!!!

So as you can probably guess, 8 years of college does not leave much money in ones pocket. This is one of the many reasons my family felt I was nuts for even considering a 9 day trip for three people. Considering the amount of debt accrued through student loans, there were many more reasonable things I could save my money for. I own very little furniture (a bed and tv stand to be exact), and I could really use some new work clothes and a better running vehicle! There were so many reasons why I shouldn't go.

With all the voices in my head telling me to be smart with my money, one stood out. It was the voice asking me, "what is more important: saving money towards my student loans, or enjoying myself when I have the chance?" There would not be many other times in my life when my loans would be in deferment. There would not be many other opportunities around where my sisters and I would all be free to go during the same period of time. While we are all currently unmarried, eventually we would begin building our families. While I could save, buy some furniture, and make a couple larger payments on my student loans, my family is much more important to me. We have never done a trip together with just the three of us before. I hope and pray we will be able to do it again soon, but we don't know that. I decided to take this opportunity and run with it. I praise God daily for the decision that was made.

Next up, Part IV: Approval, Finals, and some Disney planning in between!

A little support in honor of my gorgeous nephews

2008-10-22T15:33:00.000-07:00

Asher, two years

Jacob at birth

Most of you probably remember all too well when my friend (more like sister) Heather gave birth to her twin boys, Asher and Jacob at 24 weeks gestation. Thinking back it feels like it happened just yesterday. These little boys stole my heart from the beginning and demonstrated to the world courage, strength, and how God can use even the tiniest of boys to show his glory. While Jacob is no longer with us physically, we think of him all the time and know he is with us in Spirit. As I watch Asher grow, I witness God's miracles almost daily, even if only through the phone! With his first steps, first word, his smiles, giggles... everything leaves me in awe. These are things the doctors said we would never see; yet here he is, living life to its fullest.

Below is a message from the March of Dimes. Please consider signing this petition to support our little heroes and hopefully to one day prevent premature births.

Dear March of Dimes Family & Friends:

Join me as I help the March of Dimes raise awareness about the problem of premature birth. In the United States today, 1 in 8 babies is born prematurely. More newborns die from premature birth than any other cause. And millions of children face serious health challenges or have trouble learning in school because they were born too soon.

It’s time for us to do more to help moms have healthy, full-term babies. To help us make progress in preventing premature births go to www.marchofdimes.com/petition and sign the Petition for Preemies. The number of people who sign can really make a difference.

Remember — November is Prematurity Awareness Month.

P.S. Want to make an even bigger difference? Please forward this message to everyone you know who cares about babies. Tell them you signed the petition and ask them to join you!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Courtney N. Cartwright
Community Director
March of Dimes
5100 N. Brookline
Oklahoma City , OK 73112
Telephone (405) 943-1025
Fax (405) 943-8901

Life

2008-10-13T16:36:00.000-07:00

Hello friends,

I am here! The foot is doing much better; still swollen some and a bit sore, but is healing really well.

Life has been very chaotic lately. Some good, some not so good. I wish I could share every little detail with you all but I cannot. Life has thrown many surprises that are forcing me to grow much faster than I anticipated. I am learning a lot and hope that I can take this part of my life journey and learn from it. I do not believe God causes bad things to happen, but I do know that God can always use them for good.

With that said, I ask that you would please pray for me, as right now I could really use them.

Thank you all for your faithful support; you are truly wonderful.

The joys of feet

2008-09-14T19:10:00.000-07:00

Hello Friends,

I'm sorry for the long delay in posting. I just had another foot surgery on Friday, this time on the right foot. I'm still very drugged and of course sore. I promise a real update will follow, but for now i'm going to go curl up with some Disney movies. That always makes me feel better. *smile*

Hope you are all doing well.

What it Means to be a Pastor

2008-08-22T08:08:00.000-07:00

Over the last few weeks, I have been learning a great deal more about what it means to be a Pastor. In Seminary, while they try to prepare you for the realities of this call, you still tend to leave with this glossed over view of what real ministry is. It is in the excitement of FINALLY getting out into the "real world" to do "real ministry" that you can miss what exactly it really entails.

I am learning, albeit probably more quickly than I would like, that ministry has its ups/downs, joys/sorrows, peaceful moments/not-so-peaceful moments. I've discovered that learning about being a Pastor is not so much done through classes and reading, but must be done experientially. I've also learned that the greatest resource aside from prayer and the Gospel really is found in your colleagues.

One of the goals I have had throughout seminary and continue to carry with me into my first call is to continue the process of forming my pastoral identity. While I was able to get to the place where I actually wanted to be a pastor before graduation, I am continually molding and shaping what that means. Through the experiences I have had in the last three months, and through the experiences I will continue to have, my pastoral identity will grow and change.

Being a pastor is not a frilly, happy-go-lucky kind of job. It can be raw and difficult at one moment, then the next will be filled with complete joy. In both cases, I am finding as a pastor you can experience contentment, knowing you are serving in the places God has called you to serve. That contentment, however, does not always come easily or immediately.

While seminary attempts to prepare us for the realities of ministry, I really do not think that full preparation is possible. The tools they offered have certainly come into play and I am so thankful to have them. The reality of walking into any new career, however, can only be experienced through actually doing the work.

It can be fun, it can be difficult, it has challenged me in ways I never expected.

A Much Needed Vacation

2008-08-07T14:24:00.000-07:00

I am back to work and while part of me is thrilled to get back to "normal" life, i'm already counting down the days till my next vacation! Which, by the way, is in about 165 days. Woo hoo for Disney World!

Heather and I had such a wonderful time during her visit. We spent much of the time talking and catching up. It was the first time her and I have spent time just the two of us since college (around 2003). The last few times we have been together were during Jacob's funeral, more time with Asher in the hospital, then right after he came home. While those were important and much needed visits, it was nice to just have some time relaxing!

We went to Gettysburg so Heather could see my old home town. We toured the battlefield, visited the wax museum, then had dinner with Audrey, our college professor. I really do miss Gettysburg so much! It was strange visiting the seminary knowing I am an alumni now. Part of me wishes I was still a student (never thought I would say that).

The next day we went to Washington DC which was Heather's first time. We spent much of the day at the Holocaust museum which was very important for Heather. It was my fifth time visiting and I am always amazed that there is more to see. I am still overwhelmed with emotion when I visit the museum.

We then headed out to see the main monuments. It was beautiful weather throughout the beginning, but then of course a thunderstorm hit when we were at Lincoln. The storm lasted quite a while so we decided to brave the weather. You can see above the evidence of that endeavor!

What I thought was very cool was once the storm past, a rainbow appeared perfectly at the Washington Monument. It was one of the most beautiful things i've seen. To me, it was the perfect way to end our visit to the capital.

The next day we laid around in our pajamas watching movies. This is a very important tradition Heather and I insist on keeping. We used to do this all the time at my father's house during college. I miss doing this so much. There aren't many people who can truly be as lazy as I am! :)

After Heather left, I spent some time processing the events of this summer and taking time to rest and recoup. While it was good to forget about my troubles while Heather was here, it was also good for me to take time to work through things. I've had a major headache the last week or so, but it is finally lifting. I'm taking that as a sign that I really am healing.

So as you can see, things really are getting back to normal. It feels so good to write that! Work is in full swing, and I am even catching up on Asher and Jacob's Friends. I have missed my old self so much and am not use to feeling so broken. I cannot thank God enough for this week of healing.

Could I be more excited by this???

2008-08-06T17:00:00.000-07:00

New Friend's Video

2008-08-04T18:56:00.000-07:00

Silencing the Heart

2008-07-28T21:07:00.000-07:00

As I approach the day I was supposed to get married, I am working very hard on the healing process. It may sound unhealthy, but I am learning to silence the heart. No, this is not the same as hardening my heart, but it is working to calm the love I had built over the last 18 months. It is the process of letting go.

I don't think my heart will ever be truly separated from him. There is no way one can feel such strong emotions towards another and then have them end completely. I will always pray for and find myself concerned for him and how he is doing. I will still feel anger and frustration over what occurred, though hopefully that will calm soon. I have abused my anger a few times too many in the process of this relationship ending.

In one way or another, I think all our significant relationships will impact us for a lifetime.

I struggle to understand why I feel the need to share these thoughts with you, my readers. Part of me thinks it is because so many of you can probably relate to this process. I have never gone through a difficult break-up before, so this is very new to me. Through this blog, I guess I hope to find some wisdom, relation, and more importantly, prayer.

My dear friend (more like sister) comes into town this week to help me through this weekend, which was meant to be the wedding. We will have fun, we will explore the East coast, we will talk about these things only the way a best friend could. God has been and will continue to use Heather and others to minister to me as I heal. I feel blessed to have such a tremendous support system.

So that is where I am at. I am broken but am healing. Sermons are beginning to come easier, which is a sign to me that my faith is finding its grip again. I am talking to God more openly than I have since this began. Rather than my silence, words are forming.

Please keep up those prayers. They are felt and so very appreciated.

Romans 8:26-39 Sermon

2008-07-26T17:53:00.000-07:00

A persons hands can tell a thousand stories. They tell of pain with their scars, cracks, and aging. They can tell of celebrations through their manicures and delicately painted nails. Some hands are soft, speaking at times to a calmer, more sedate life. Others are callused, bruised, and scarred speaking to years of hard labor. Hands can tell stories.

Nelson Mandela, in his autobiography, A Long Walk to Freedom, recalls the scene when he first laid eyes on his granddaughter. It was after his fourteenth year in prison, when he was granted permission for a short visit from his daughter. Upon her arrival, his daughter ran across the room to embrace him. Mandela had not held his daughter since she was a young girl, and it was both poignant and dizzying to hug this fully grown woman, his child.

It was after this embrace that she then handed over her own newborn baby, Nelsons granddaughter, into his callused, leathery hands. He recalls, “To hold a newborn baby, so vulnerable and soft in my rough hands, hands that for too long had held only picks and shovels, was a profound joy. I don’t think a man was ever happier to hold a baby than I was that day”.

Hands tell a story. They can tell of how we, who begin like that newborn child with smooth, soft skin, age from the wear and tear of this journey we call life. Our hands, like our hearts, can become callused and scarred by the years of suffering, distress, and peril we face. They are permanent markers which will ultimately always remind us of the journey we have faced.

In Paul’s letter to the Romans, he is writing to a group of Christians who are faced day in and day out with suffering. They have faced conflicts within the Church itself, struggling between a Jewish and Gentile understanding of what is the Christian church. As with any Christian body during that time, they have also suffered persecution, exile, and other forms of distress. Their life was filled with turmoil; I can only imagine what kind of marks the pain and suffering experienced left on their hands.

It is in those times, the times that leave marks forever engrained within us, that often we may not feel like praying. We, those who are known as “people of faith” may feel spiritually empty. They are the times when the sorrows of this world have become too much. Like Mandela, we may feel as though we have been imprisoned by years spent in a bad marriage, depression, grief over the loss of a loved one, or suffering years of poverty or abuse. While we may not be encaged within the walls of a prison cell, the pain we are living in has trapped us from living our lives and experiencing the joys found within a strong faith.

Suffering can take its toll on our relationships, including our relationship to God. While some may teach us that doubting, questioning, and being angry towards God is bad and unfaithful, it is a natural part of the relationship. Like the relationship we have with our spouse, parent, friend, or child, we will get angry, we will doubt, we will question. It is what it means to be in relationship. When we have suffered pain, turmoil, and conflict, often times it will impact how we relate to God. We may yell, we may write letters, we may become silent. Sometimes there just aren’t the words necessary to adequately talk to God. And sometimes, we just don’t want to communicate.

It is in the times where the ability to communicate with God come up short, when we are just too angry, too sad, too confused to find the words, prayer seems impossible. It is in those moments where we feel we must lean on others to have faith for us, as ours comes up short. We may believe in God, yet our emotions overrun our ability to speak and relate.

In those moments, we can trust that the Spirit will intercede for us. Paul states “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words.” We can know, we can trust, that even when our hearts are too callused, when the death of our child shuts us down completely, the Spirit will do the work for us.

The Spirit is the Spirit which will intercede, speaking on our behalf. It is the Spirit that will overwhelm us like the wind, bringing us comfort and peace in the midst of chaos. It is the Spirit that when we feel most abandoned and alone is indwelling within each of us. It is the Spirit that has been with us since the beginning and will never leave.

When those times of complete weakness, physically, emotionally, spiritually, come around, the Spirit will breath those sighs. They are the sighs that can speak beyond our mere vocabulary to communicate our deepest pangs of grief. They are the sighs that will communicate all our suffering, all our grief, all our anger. The sighs are the ones that will echo the truth of every bruise, scar, calluse, and crack that are engrained on our hands and on our heart. They are the sighs that will communicate our hope and are longing for healing.

I read once that “a record of God’s faithfulness in the past combines with hope in a better future for one end: to equip us for the present.” Paul’s message to the Romans was a message speaking to a future. It is the promise that even though they were suffering, God did and still does have a great plan for the future. A plan where all suffering will end and the dead will be resurrected, offering a new Heaven and a New Earth. It is a message speaking of hope in the midst of suffering.

What Paul may or may not have realized is that his message of hope for the future brings us hope for the present. We have the past which speaks to God’s faithfulness. God’s faithfulness recorded in scripture and God’s faithfulness recorded in our personal history. God is and will continue to remain faithful. We are also given hope for the future. It is the knowledge that sin and evil will ultimately be destroyed and that God has given us the gift of grace; we have the hope of the resurrection.

These promises and the evidence of God’s faithfulness in the past is what equips us for present suffering. It is what gives us comfort in despair, hope in times that feel so hopeless. These promises are what give us the knowledge to realize that when times are too difficult and painful to use words, the Spirit will intercede and sigh on our behalf. When we are too weak to do the work, God will continue to do the work for us.

We are all faced with the marks of suffering. We can look at our hands and sometimes see the physical evidence. We can also look internally and see how are hearts have been scarred over many times throughout this life. And yet, with each day that we continue on, hope will reappear in the soft, unscarred skin of a baby, a reminder of our future. God does promise us that hope, and God does promise us a Spirit that will intercede when we struggle to recognize that hope and the words just will not come. While the Spirit does not prevent the scarring that will ultimately occur, the Spirit will indeed sigh on our behalf and will always be present with us, offering comfort, peace, and continued hope for the future. Amen.

Fur Covered Healing

2008-07-23T12:36:00.000-07:00

It amazes me how powerful the love cats, dogs, and other furry friends can be in the healing process. Whether it is healing from an illness or the healing of ones heart, God certainly uses them to offer us comfort and strength.

A couple weeks ago, a friend gave me the initiative to look into adopting a dog. This is something I have always wanted to do but have put off due to my small living quarters and finances. Now that I have both a real, paying job and a new house, those can no longer be used as excuses.

Upon receiving her email, I decided just to peruse the petfinder site. This is where I also happened to find Melanchthon back in the Fall of 2003. I immediately fell in love with a cute, older black lab. I emailed the adoption agency (Pets Come First in State College) only to find out she had already been adopted. They then proceeded to send me the pictures of several other dogs, one being sweet little Caroline.

She is a 5 year old hound/lab mix and she arrived at my house yesterday. She has suffered multiple homes, heartworm, lyme disease, and neglect but seems to be adjusting quite well to our home. The cats are even doing wonderfully with her calm personality. It is such a joy.

The moment I decided to adopt Caroline, I felt a strong change happen in me. I was really not doing well and was falling into a deep depression. The break up of my relationship has really taken a toll. While I am not even close to completely "recovered" from this, Caroline has given me something to look forward to. I have moved out of the crisis state and into the healing process.

While work continues and I move forward with the necessary tasks each day, I can't seem to get myself out of this funk. Many have said to me what a great learning experience it has been to see that things like this even happen to pastors. For them, it has made pastors seem more "real", that they really are human. Hearing this is a great blessing and I am glad to know that others have learned something from this. However, it has not made it any easier to walk through.

This experience has taught me a great deal. Honestly, I wish beyond anything that none of this ever happened, especially at this point in my life. It is difficult to understand the "why's" regarding the break up and the timing. I'm finding myself questioning things more personally and theologically.

One of the many hard lessons I have learned is regarding the difficulties surrounding being a pastoral leader when you are in a spiritual crisis. Writing sermons, answering questions, and the like are not easy when you feel so empty. It makes me wish I was in my 20th year of ministry so that I had a file folder full of old sermons I could reuse. I have found myself drawing up blanks when reflecting on scripture. Truly, if it wasn't the Holy's Spirit's work, there would be nothing to preach on Sunday.

And yet, with all of this internal struggle, each day that goes by I do find myself doing better. It is not as difficult to get out of bed, I don't have to fake every smile, i'm surrounded by a constant source of love amongst the congregations. And, I have three wonderful fur-children who offer unconditional love.

Please continue to keep me in your prayers. Like all times of trial, this is a journey which will hopefully end having grown stronger from the heartache.

Long Overdue Update

2008-07-11T14:02:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone,

I pray you are all doing well. Since my last update, there have been many highs and many lows. Settling in to my first 6 weeks of ministry has been wonderful. The congregations have both been so warm, open, and understanding when I make newby mistakes. I have now presided at Holy Communion four times and still get chills. At the "little church", we have started our first Bible Study. When I arrived there was no Sunday school/Bible study of any kind. We had a great turn out and everyone loved it! It was only supposed to be an hour long, but everyone wanted to stay. We ended up staying for just under two hours!

At the "big church" I have been doing a lot of program planning. I will soon attend my first youth committee meeting followed later by an informational meeting on the ELCA national youth gathering. It seems everyone in the congregation is excited to try out new and fun ideas for youth and intergenerational ministries. One of the first events I have on my calendar will be an intergenerational reformation party; should be fun!

Outside of that, I have had a very rough few weeks. My relationship with my fiance took a dramatic turn in June when he broke into a deep depression. I will not share many of the details, but it has been difficult. After really trying to "save" the relationship, which included outside help, prayer, and discernment, I made the decision just last evening to end the relationship completely. While it broke my heart to do so, I knew it had to be done for the health of both of us. Please keep us both in your prayers as we work through the pain of this experience and move forward on our individual journeys. Even though I am hurting now, I have learned a great deal and will grow from this experience. There is so much to look forward to in the future, I know we will both be just fine.

The beginning of my time in ordained ministry has already had so many twists and turns both professionally and personally. While some of it has been hard, there are many good things happening. I have vacation time scheduled for when the wedding was going to be and plan to still take that time. Today my friend Heather is hopefully going to be able to make reservations to come out for a visit. This would be great as she has never been out here and I could show her around Pennsylvania, Maryland, and DC. If this does not occur, I will head out to Oklahoma to spend time with her family that week (which would mean seeing Asher!). I think this time of rest will be very good for me and will help in regaining some of my energy and focus. I pray you are all doing well. Thank you, as always, for the prayers and support you offer. I hope my next update will bring good news and joyous experiences to share with you!

The Issue of Trust

2008-06-28T10:45:00.000-07:00

It is interesting to consider that in my entrance psychological exams for seminary, I came out as being overly trusting.

Over the last few weeks, I have come to the realization that I am not a very trusting person. Certainly, I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt in everyday relationships. When it comes to the heart, however, I tend to guard myself a little too much.

I have held up many walls over the years to protect myself from getting hurt. I have been working at bringing those walls down lately, but it makes me feel incredibly vulnerable. I sense a strong threat of getting hurt and it scares me.

Right now, I am learning my faith in God's presence isn't as strong as I thought it was. I don't trust that God will bring me through the good and the bad. I preach the message regularly, but now understand I have never truly taken that message to heart. This is a very difficult thing to realize, and i'm a bit ashamed.

I know this isn't my normal, bubbly post, but even I have those "non-bubbly" moments. This time of transition personally and vocationally is a bit difficult right now. If you could please keep me in your prayers, it would be very much appreciated.

A Name Change

2008-06-06T04:00:00.000-07:00

Before I head off to Synod assembly, I wanted to share the news that I now have an official title in front of my name! I am now, the "Reverend Laura insert last name"!

Pretty darn cool, isn't it?! Thanks God! :)

I will share more details about my ordination when I get a free moment. Thank you for your prayers!

Call Sermon

2008-05-23T13:18:00.000-07:00

I haven't shared a sermon with you for a while and thought it was high time. Here is the sermon I preached the day I was officially called to the congregations. I am moving this weekend and as soon as the internet is hooked up in the parsonage, I promise I will give a real update. Enjoy!

For decades, Alaska’s commercial fishing industry has been listed as the most dangerous job around. The Alaskan crab season can last anywhere from a couple days to a few weeks, usually during the fall and winter months. It takes place in the Gulf of Alaska where over 200 fishing vessels are docked at Dutch Harbor, ready to set out.

To crab fish, the workers must drop 800 pound steel cages covered in herring meat where they will rest for a couple days. The fishermen then return to each trap where they hope and pray each cage is filled with crab.

The men and women will often work 18-20 hour days, creating intense mental strain and exhaustion. They risk getting caught in the coils or on traps. The winter waters in the Bering Sea can cause hypothermia within seconds and the risk of capsizing is high due to rogue waves.

Those working on the fishing vessel must labor as a team day and night. Each brings their individual gifts to the work, baiting the traps, bringing in the traps, filling the tanks, removing unwanted catches, cooking the meals… They must listen to each other and more importantly their captain. Renegade fishermen often cause disaster either putting them at risk for losing their catch or their lives.

Today we celebrate the Church; it is the day of Pentecost. We remember how upon Jesus’ ascension into Heaven we were given the gift of the Holy Spirit. It is the gift of our Trinitarian God’s continued work in the world through the Christian body. It is the Spirit’s working through us, acting as our captain to guide us in the work of the Church.

The word for Spirit in the Greek is pneuma, often translated as wind or breath. It is the word used to describe Jesus breathing the Spirit on the disciples, and it is the same word used to describe God’s act of breathing life into Adam. It is a word that encapsulates life and energy. The Spirit is the life breath of the church, motivating us, comforting us, encouraging us along the way. Like the captain of commercial fishing boat, it is the drive that moves us into action. It is the breath that unifies us to fulfill a common mission.

As with the crew on a fishing boat, we all bring many and varied gifts to the ministry. In fishing, the captain will identify the gifts each individual crew member has and will accordingly assign them to their different tasks. In the body of Christ, the Spirit breathes life into church, offering unique and wonderful gifts for each individual. These are the gifts of the preacher, the teacher, the musician, the sexton, the health care worker, the quilter, the steel worker…. The Spirit has empowered the Christian body with incredible diversity in order to fulfill the mission of sharing the Good News to the world.

They are gifts which come in a variety of ways, some spectacular, demanding our attention, and others more quiet, gradually coming into notice. In crab fishing one is much more apt to notice the intense and dramatic work of the people on deck, bringing in the crab pots and emptying them. The cook downstairs, however, is much less noticeable until everyone becomes hungry and shares in a meal.

This past Friday at the seminary, a class of over 40 students graduated with degrees which will give us some of the tools needed to do the ministries to which we are called. We were told with the degrees in hand, we were now prepared to go out and serve in hospitals, social ministries, as professors, and as pastors. The president of the seminary placed in our hands a beautiful certificate with our names on them, claiming us as bearers of a Master’s of Divinity, ministerial studies, or other such degrees. It was claimed we now have what it takes to do the ministry to which we are so called.

Each of us in this graduating class, are much like the crew members of a fishing vessel. We came from a variety of backgrounds and bring to the ministry a wide variety of gifts. Some will go out to minister in hospitals. Some will go out to combat zones to minster as military chaplains. Some plan to write books or teach. Some hope to work as associate ministers while others feel called to rural ministry. Though we lived together, ate together, and sat day in and day out in classrooms and libraries united as one class…we are now to be scattered throughout the world.

And yet though we are scattered, we are still united as one Christian body. The greatest preparation we received over the last four years together and throughout our lives was not the education or that beautiful, wonderful certificate that was placed in our hands. It was not even the relationships we built with each other over the last four years. Rather, it is the way in which the Holy Spirit, our life breath, has guided us through this journey in ministry, fed us through word, sacrament, and community. It is the way in which the Spirit has gifted us with the tools needed in order to fulfill the calls we have been given.

As the body of Christ, we are all called to be active participants in the Church’s mission. In baptism, we were told to “let your light so shine before others that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven”. Through the water and the Word proclaimed, we were given the gift of the Holy Spirit and called to go forth proclaiming the Good News of God’s grace. This light we were called to let shine is the light of Christ and the good works we were called to perform is the work of the Spirit through the gifts we have been given.

This commissioning to be active participants in the Christian body can be laden with fear and anxiety. Much like the disciples in the upper room that evening, we can lock the doors of our hearts and minds for fear of getting hurt. Though we may not fear for our lives as the disciples did, we can often be scared of embarrassment or failure. At times, the gifts the Spirit gives us are not the kinds we would have chosen. We may not want to be the deckhands or the cooks. We may not want to be teachers, preachers, readers, greeters, or ushers. We may not feel we are capable of doing the things to which we are called…and yet the call continues to beckon to us.

Even when we can close the doors of our hearts and minds, Jesus will enter our locked rooms. Not by breaking down the door or picking the lock. Jesus simply will appear, extend his hands, and call out “peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” And we are in turn given the gift of the Spirit.

We are not sent out to use the gifts given empty handed. Our loving God knows that without the Holy Spirit, we would all be failures. There is no way our simple human nature could perform such great tasks. And yet with the Holy Spirit, all things are possible.

This is the way in which the Spirit works in all of our lives. We have been given gifts for ministry that are wide and varied. Not all are called to the public forms of ministry such as becoming pastors or diaconal ministers. We are not all called to be organists in the congregation or teachers in the classroom. And yet we are all given the gift of the life breath of the church, our captain, the Holy Spirit. It is the Spirit that guides us in our call to ministry, uniting us as the Christian body to fulfill the Church’s great mission.

There is no need for us to fear failure, as this is not simply our work. If it were, we would have reason to fear. Yet the great God who appeared in locked rooms, who rose from the dead, and who poured out the Spirit is the same God who will act through each of us to share the Good News to all. Amen.

The Best Weekend EVER!

2008-05-14T12:25:00.001-07:00

To say this past weekend was one of the best ever feels a bit like an understatement. It seems everything that possibly could have gone right did. What a tremendous gift!

My father, stepmother, and older sister all arrived on Thursday evening. It was such a gift to have them here to witness graduation and the last part of the call process. We had a great time visiting over the past six days and I miss them already. In between all the exciting events, we were able to explore Gettysburg and Lancaster county. The weather didn't always cooperate, but that did not phase us brave northwesterners at all! My amazing professor from Trinity, friend, and now colleague Audrey was able to make it for graduation! She is one of the main reasons I ended up going to Gettysburg. I could never thank her enough for encouraging me to attend all the way across the country. Pennsylvania has become my home and I would not trade my experience at Gettysburg Seminary for anything.

Graduation was everything I could have hoped and more. I really did not realize how important this was to me until I was up there about to receive my diploma. Looking around at my classmates and professors, I realized how much each person in the room has become a part of my life. God really used this amazing community to help in forming my pastoral identity.

Receiving the hood and the diploma was an incredible experience. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would recieve a Master's degree, let alone a four year Master of Divinity. I sat and stared at the diploma many times for days afterwards. It is a tremendous accomplishment only possible through the Holy Spirit. I know I could not have done this by any other means. God is so good and I cannot wait to serve in the parish!

Another major component to graduation day was Terry's arrival in town! For those who do not know, I met Terry online about 15 months ago. Why I joined eharmony is a whole other email but let me tell you, I am SO glad I did! Two weeks into my online journey, I was matched with Terry and knew from that moment on my membership would have to simply run out.

Our first conversation was over two hours long and it just kept getting better from there. He was in Okinawa at the time, serving as a religious program specialist in the Navy assigned to a Marine unit. The majority of our time has been spent communicating over the phone and online due to the distance. He is now living in South Carolina, making the distance better but still not great. We have become amazing friends simply through the phone and letters.

This weekend we decided to officially begin dating. We know with the distance this will not be easy, but we are up to the challenge! He will be in the states until October and then will do a six month tour in Iraq. After Iraq, it is our hope and prayer he will be able to begin seminary here in Gettysburg sometime soon after!

On Sunday Terry, my family, and I all traveled up to the churchs for my final call vote! This included my leading worship in both congregations. It was so special having them here to witness this event. I am pleased to announce there was a 95% majority vote in favor of calling me to St. Luke's in Mount Union and St. James in Huntingdon, PA! I will be the solo part-time pastor at St. Luke's and the Associate part-time Pastor at St. James in charge of youth, family, and intergenerational ministries! It is a wonderful call and I am so excited to begin.

Ordination is now scheduled for June 5th in Altoona, PA at the opening worship for Synod Assembly. If any of you are able to make it, please feel free to join us! I will officially be a pastor after ordination and will begin working that Sunday.

So, that is my big update! Thank you all for your love, prayers, and support. It has been a crazy journey and I could not have done any of it without you. I will continue to keep you posted on all the exciting events!

Asher and Jacob's Friends Video

2008-05-06T13:44:00.000-07:00

Please Friends, Share this video any way you can. Whether you embed it on your page or pass around the link, the more people who know about this site, the more support we can offer those in need!

We're Gonna Graduate!!!!

2008-05-05T11:48:00.000-07:00

Yup, it's really going to happen! Grades were turned in for seniors at noon today. I recited a Psalm in class this afternoon which was the very last assignment EVER other than continuing ed stuff. AND, I just picked up my cap and gown for graduation (as seen demonstrated by Katy)!!!

This is my third graduation and by far the most exciting. The difference between this verses High School and College graduation is I actually believe it is the end! The possibility of my doctorate will always hang in the air, but financially and time wise I doubt that will ever happen. I have learned though never to say never, as God does enjoy a good laugh. :)

Family is flying in this Thursday evening from Seattle and graduation is Friday at 1:30pm. Saturday I then drive up to my possible future home for a meet and greet with the congregation. Sunday I will return there to preach and have the final call vote! Things are happening right and left, and I can say all i'm doing right now is walking around with a BIG smile!

Alright, I am off to do a bit of cleaning. Hope you are all doing well and be on the lookout for more exciting news! This next week I should be able to tell you where I moving and when!!

Disney World

2008-04-26T13:01:00.000-07:00

Alright, so i'm sooo not concentrating on the homework I should be doing.

In January 2009, i'm hoping to do a trip to Disney World with my two sisters. Not one of us has ever been there, though we have done Disney Land. The other cool thing is it will be the first trip we have done with just the three of us! When I came to Seminary, I promised myself when I graduated that I would do this and now it is (I think) really going to happen; woo hoo!

Anyway, I have been busily making plans when I should really be doing homework. I think I have some good ideas about how to do the trip but am still looking for help.

Do any of you Disney veterans have good ideas????

The Obsurdity of the Vet

2008-04-22T16:48:00.000-07:00

So, can someone please explain this to me? How is it that I go in to the doctor and, after what little insurance I have the bill comes out LESS than a trip to the veteranarian?! Each and everytime I go in to the vet, I leave stomping my feet all huffy puffy as half my bank account has been tapped.

Now don't get me wrong: I love my pets. These two furry little creatures, although rather annoying at times, are part of my family. When I go away for a weekend, I always find myself unable to sleep as I don't have two fur-kids pressed up against my head suffocating me. I love them, no matter how much they meow, shed, and spazz out throughout the night (and day).

Unfortunately, now that I have spend almost fifty dollars on Melanchthon this morning, I also have the joy of having a roid filled cat. This is about our sixth go-round with prednisone and I can tell you right here and now, I am not looking forward to it. Like humans, cats get hungry, thirsty, moody, and just plain bizarre when they go on steroids. He has only had one dose and has already screeched up and down the hall about forty times.

Ahhh, finals week is turning out to be even more FUN than I had predicted! *smile*

Alright, I promise I am done whining...for now.

A Little Less Secreteness (Is that a word?)

2008-04-21T16:02:00.000-07:00

Alright, so here is a little more info on the call process:

1) I have finished 2 of the 3 interviews and have had unanimous votes at BOTH!

2) The third and final part of the process will take place May 10th -11th. This is only ONE day after graduation and will be the congregational call vote. I will preach and help lead worship. The vote will take place that day and if they vote in my favor, I will either accept, reject, or take up to 30 days to make the decision.

3) If everything goes well, I will hopefully be ordained in early June and start very soon after that.

4) I am EXHAUSTED!

Hope you are all doing well. I have a TON of homework that is due by Monday of next week so should get going. Please keep praying, and I will continue to reveal details as I am able!

Living in a world of secrets

2008-04-09T11:51:00.000-07:00

Hello dear friends,

I know many of you are wondering what in the world is going on in regards to the call process. As you can tell by the title of this blog, it is all about the secrets.

What I can tell you is I am indeed in the call process. So far it is going wonderfully and I am deep in discernment. This has been a marvelous process and I am learning a great deal more about how the Church functions. I had always wondered how the interview process was different for a pastor verses a "regular" job. I can tell you now it is INCREDIBLY different. Some of those differences are wonderful, some are overwhelming.

I can also tell you this process is not fast. It is not like going into a job interview and knowing within the week if you have it. This will take time, weeks, not days. The call process is a time to discern as a pastor (or future pastor in my case) and as a congregation. This is an interview both for the congregation and the pastor. It is a coming together to discern where God wants all of us to be.

So, I hope this gives some answer to those who are "biting at the bit". As more is able to be revealed, I will be certain to share it. Your prayers, concerns, questions, and loving support have all been felt and appreciated. Thank you for being there for me throughout this journey. I pray you are all doing well and would love to hear how you are doing when you have time!

The Beginning of the End

2008-03-22T13:25:00.000-07:00

Whew, I did not realize how long it had been since I gave a real post. I guess that is just a testament to how busy things have been!

Life seems to be speeding up and slowing down all at the same time. The last few weeks I have had a case of the "seminary plague" which was probably heightened by all the stress of my last semester. Doctors in this area say it has been one of the worst flu seasons they have seen in over a decade; I would have to say from my experience with it, I agree! Glad it is over a gone finally, as it was absolutely horrible.

My younger sister came in to town to spend Spring break with me last week. Aside from the flu, we had a great time. We spent most of our time here in the Gettyburg area, going up to Hershey, the Harrisburg area, and even horseback riding here on the battlefield (very cool, I recommend it).

In the midst of the flu, I had a meeting scheduled in New York City. My body really didn't want to go, but I knew I needed to. We took the train in from Harrisburg and spent the first day resting and then seeing the broadway production of Spamalot (my favorite). That evening I got really sick and it didn't end in time for the meeting. As hard as it was, I knew I had no choice but to cancel it. We then called and got an earlier train back to Harrisburg. As miserable as I felt, Jamie and I still managed to have a good time. The interview will now take place over the phone this upcoming week.

The call process has been going really well. Unfortunately, I can't say much about any of the details. This makes it difficult to share my joy with others, but it is the way things are done in the church. What I can tell you is I have a big interview coming up in the near future. Please, keep me and the congregation in your prayers as we interview. I will whole-heartedly admit I am nervous! I know that as long as I am myself, it will all work out. It is still scary though....

Another exciting thing coming up is I will be teaching a one day course on Christian Education for lay people on April 12th. I was asked to do this last summer and am very excited about it. I will be focusing on teaching the students how to create a mission statement for their Sunday school program and how to pick and adapt curriculums to fit their congregations. It should be a lot of fun.

Thank you for all your prayers and support. It is really difficult to believe in under 50 days I will have graduated (that is if I finish all this homework that has piled up!). I am looking forward to it but will really miss this community. I love Gettysburg so much and the people I am surrounded with on a daily basis. Thankfully I will only be a couple hours from here so can visit often.

Alright, back to homework! I pray you are all doing well, and promise to update you soon!

Laura Lynn
http://www.asherandjacobsfriends.com/
http://laurathevicar.blogspot.com/

Idol

2008-03-01T18:12:00.000-08:00

In case you didn't know already, i've come out of the closet and whole-heartedly admit i'm an idol fan. And, I hate to say it but i've completely fallen for one particular contestant. Now tell me, is this 17 year old kid not AMAZING?!!! Turn off the music on the right side and enjoy!

Assignment!

2008-02-22T17:18:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone!

I apologize for leaving you in suspense. I am so pleased to announce I have been assigned to the Allegheny Synod in central Pennsylvania. This is the area in which I did internship and I loved it so much. The synod goes from the Somerset area up through State College. It is beautiful and is surrounded to the Appalachian "mountains". Sorry for the parenthesis, but being an Alaskan it is hard to call those things mountains!

What will happen now is I will begin recieve a profile on a congregation. We will then begin the interviewing process which includes preaching at the congregation. A voting process then takes place and if all goes well, I will accept the call! If this does not occur, the process begins all over again with another congregation.

In regards to my ordination, this is all dependent upon the call process. The one thing I can promise is it will not happen before graduation in May. I know many of you who hope to come out are eager to find out when this will be. Unfortunately, in most cases there is not much notice as to when or where this will take place. If you are looking to attend, please let me know and I will notify you as soon as I can.

Thank you for all your notes of prayer, encouragement, and even concern when you didn't hear anything! I was assigned to the region on Wednesday and didn't hear from the Bishop about the synod till this afternoon. This is all so exciting though a little overwhelming.

Please continue to keep me in your prayers throughout this process, especially that the Holy Spirit will guide me to wherever I am called.

Laura

My personal blog: http://laurathevicar.blogspot.com/

Colbert, New York, and the Call Process!

2008-02-09T19:29:00.000-08:00

Yesterday my two friends and I went to see the Stephen Colbert portrait hanging between the bathrooms of the National Portrait Gallery in Washington DC. For those who do not watch the Colbert Report on Comedy Central, it is a political satire type news show (I would highly recommend it). On the show, he attempted to have his portrait displayed in the American History Museum only to be rejected and sent to the Portrait Gallery. As they have a good sense of humor, the obliged and placed it between the bathrooms and above two drinking fountains. It is only there until March 2nd so we made sure to make it over before it was removed. I have to say, it seems they are getting many more visitors, though they are all found surrounding the restroom entrance!

School is still going well and I am continuing with my goal to stay motivated through the semester (see previous blog post). I am entering week three and am still enjoying my classes! Right now I am busy working on the research project for my Theology of Cancer course. I have decided to journey up to New York City in March to visit with a chaplain at Memorial Sloan Kettering, one of the top cancer research hospitals in the world. Some of the families from the website I run have children who are being treated there and I am currently setting up some meetings with them. The project I am doing is to study how family dynamics are effected when a child is undergoing treatment for cancer. It is my hope that this project will be a helpful resource to myself and other pastors when congregation members are facing similar situations.

Some other exciting news is in a mere 10 days the regional assignment process will be complete and I will know which part of the country I will be serving in! I am becoming very excited and feel open to just about anywhere I may end up. My heart still longs to remain in Pennsylvania, but I know that God's plans are always so much better than my own. Please continue to pray for me and all the other ELCA 1st call pastors over the next couple of weeks.

So, that is about it for now. Thank you again for all your prayers and support. I promise to send out an update ASAP when I hear about the regional assignment. When you have a moment, please don't hesitate to send me a quick update about how you are doing. I really do love hearing from all of you!

Laura (and of course Mel and Katy!)
http://laurathevicar.blogspot.com/

Please don't forget to visit the website I run, Asher and Jacob's Friends. There are many who could really use your prayers.

3 months, 5 days...

2008-02-04T09:59:00.000-08:00

Three months and five days to go. Is that possible?

It is hard to believe in less than 100 days I will be done with my formal education. After twenty some-odd years, I will no longer be in school. Unbelievable!

The semester started last week and already the nostalgia is setting in. As much as I am excited to be graduating, a part of me is already longing for more time. I really do love school and it is hard to imagine what life will be like outside of it. It will be so strange to not go to bed at night thinking about all of the readings I didn't get done that day, along with that feeling of dread over sitting for two 3 1/2 hour classes the next day. As much as I can't stand that feeling, I think part of me will actually miss it!

My goal for this semester is to try and enjoy myself as much as possible. It seems every semester I start out with that newly sharpened pencil, crisp paper feel and by the end of the second week am grudgingly dragging myself to class. I don't want this semester to be like that. It is my hope and prayer that I will move past the longing to finish and will live in the moment, learning as much as I can and enjoying the freedom that comes with student life vs work life.

Speaking of which, I had better get going so I am not late for class...

Sabbatical...sort of

2008-01-19T10:30:00.000-08:00

Over the last few weeks, I have had the joy of taking a break from life. Now don't get me wrong, I love being busy and in the company of others, but it has truly been wonderful doing nothing. I have had no classes, no meetings, and only a couple appointments. Really, I have had my own sabbatical.

The most I have done over this vacation was read fun books. This has probably been the first time I have been able to do this since...well I don't even know when. I finished the entire Harry Potter series and loved it. I am going to try and read it over again to create a Bible study for Junior High/Senior High youth. I really don't understand how anyone who has read them can call them demonic or non-Christian. They really encompass so many biblical truths.

Life is quickly beginning again this weekend. I have a paper to write and then have a senior seminar about all those important practical things we don't address about being a pastor until now. While I am excited to being living in the "real world" again, it has truly been an amazing experience to take time to rest, relax, and just enjoy staying up late reading and watching movies.

These three weeks have demonstrated to me just how important self-care really is. For me this means occasionally taking time to simply be by myself in the quiet. Whether this is a few hours, a few days, or in this case a few weeks (like that will happen again!)...this is essential to my physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. This last semester really was full of stress trying to balance school, the approval process, and surgery. I didn't' realize how much it stressed me out until it was over. Looking back, I see I really didn't take the time I needed to rest. What a great lesson to have before first call.

So, today I will take a couple hours to enjoy the last bits of freedom, and then work on my paper. I will use these last few weeks as my reminder that we as Christians are called to honor the sabbath each week, and will do my best to follow this practice over the next semester.

Wish me luck...

Christmas '07

2008-01-03T12:09:00.000-08:00

I have finally returned to Gettysburg after spending two weeks with family and friends. Although it is wonderful to sleep in my own bed and have my "kids" back, my vacations always feel too short. I already miss my family and look forward
to when I can get back to the northwest again.

The beginning of vacation did not kick off as well as we had all planned. Only two days in, my father and I got a pretty severe case of food poisoning. I promise I won't go into detail, but lets just say it took quite a few days to recover. Thankfully, we recovered without having to go to the doctor, but were close to that point. I will never eat at the Cheesecake Factory again.

Once we recovered from the food poisoning, I was on my way to Anchorage! It was so great to see my sister and to have a short visit with her. We did not do anything big, but rather spent time shopping and having an early Christmas together; I loved it. I also had my approval interview with the candidacy committee. It went incredibly well; I am finally done with the candicacy process and can proceed towards ordination! I am thrilled and cannot wait to receive my first call!

After a short two days with my sister, I headed back to Seattle to spend Christmas with my father, stepmother, and younger sister (and dog of course). We had such a wonderful Christmas playing games, opening gifts, and just resting. And, would you believe it, this is what we spotted while opening gifts Christmas morning:

None of us can remember the last time it actually snowed in Seattle on Christmas; we are thinking it was the early '80's. It was beautiful and topped off a wonderful day. This is most likely the last Christmas I will spend in the Northwest, as from now on I will be serving as a pastor. Of course as a pastor you can't really go on vacation during such an important time. I feel blessed to have had such a great Christmas with my family and look forward to all of them coming out to be with me on Christmas from now on!

I ended vacation by going to meet the newest little member of our family. My cousin gave birth to this beautiful little one early in December. She is such a great mother and it was awesome to see how in tune she is with him. I cannot believe she is a mother, as I still view her and my younger sister and being so little! It evidenced to me that we are actually all adults now (scary). He was just so cute and it was fun to hold such a little one again. He looks so much like his mama and has our family's eyes.

As you can tell, it was a great vacation. I am so happy to have gotten away for a little bit. This last semester was a trying one and I was in real need of a getaway. It was nice to spend time with family, sleep in, and I even read two more of the Harry Potter books (only two more to go!). I know i'm on vacation when I get to read a fun book! :)

This January I only have an independent study course and the senior seminar the last two days. I am going to spend this time cleaning, resting, writing my paper, and just enjoying myself. In many ways, it's like my own little sabbatical! After that, it is my last semester of Seminary and then graduation. My older sister, father, and stepmother will be coming out to celebrate graduation with me which I am looking forward to.

So that is it for now. The next step in the assignment process is this February. I forget the exact date but it is towards the end of the month. The Bishops will get together and assign each of us first call pastors to a region. Within two days to a month after that I will be assigned a synod. Please be in prayer that the Spirit will be at work in the process and I will end up where I am meant to be. Of course, I have my own ideas of where I should be (don't we all), but I am doing my best to be open to anywhere. I know God will guide me to where I will best serve the Church.

I will end with a picture of my cute little nephew (friend Heather's baby) Asher. If you can believe it, this is the little guy who was born at only 24 weeks gestation! He has grown so much and is thriving. Thank you for continuing to keep him in your prayers.

Praying you all are doing well and hope you had a great Christmas!

Love, Laura

http://laurathevicar.blogspot.com/ (my online journal)

Called to love through prayer

2007-12-09T19:04:00.000-08:00

Although William Law and I would not have agreed on many things, he is the author of one of my favorite sayings. When Asher and Jacob were born, thousands of people throughout the world (literally) came to pray for these two amazing little boys. One day when I was reading a book of quotes, I stumbled upon one by Law which said, "There is nothing that makes us love someone so much as praying for them." When I read this, my eyes could not help but well up with tears, as it touched at the heart of what so many of us were experiencing at that moment.

I have been working somewhat diligently today on another project for my Epistles course. As I was studying Paul and the core teachings in his letters, I was been unable to control my mind from drifting. I've read over and over again about the call to unity as the Body of Christ. In the context of Philippians, it is the call to be unified in the midst of proclaiming the Gospel. In our little internet community, it is still the call to proclaim the Gospel, but in the form of praying and supporting those who have become family even though we have never met.

While making dinner, I thought back to last year when I attended Christi Thomas' funeral mass. This was yet another beautiful child I had never met yet fell in love with over years of following her battle with neuroblastoma. There were many who thought I was crazy for driving five hours to a funeral when I knew no one, yet my internal reaction was always "but I did know her". I knew Christi as I journeyed with her via the internet through her treatments, through her jokes and outings, through her last days. Most importantly, I knew her and fell in love with her and her family through prayer. That is what compelled me to go and it is what made a five hour drive feel like minutes. I just knew in my heart I had to be there.

When William Law says there is nothing that makes us love someone as much as prayer does, he is speaking complete truth. I know many of you who have joined in praying for the caringbridge community understand this fully. During the last couple of months, we have lost so many on Asher and Jacob's Friends list. In the midst of celebrating the holidays, there has been a deep sorrow in knowing so many were losing their loved ones. In a way, we have been grieving alongside each family. In the suffering of these families, our hearts are broken.

I have been asked by some why I continue to follow these families when there is so much sorrow involved. I've been told to protect myself from unneccesary grief. Yet I know, as i'm studying in Paul, the call is to love. It is to love and risk the suffering, as Christ loves us so much he suffered on our behalf. We are co-crucified with Christ, participating in his suffering and death. Loving others includes suffering, it is not free from pain and grief. Our call to proclaim the Gospel includes taking such risks in order to pray for others. It is the gift God has given us. I will take the risk, as the reward is so much greater. To love others and see Christ in them is one of the great blessings I have experienced. So, I will shed the tears and continue to love these children of God through prayer.

7 Days and Counting...

2007-12-07T19:33:00.000-08:00

I have a strong love/hate relationship with early December. The end of the semester always gets me quite neurotic and riled easily. I'm finding this year is worse than others, particularly because I know the importance of doing well in my courses. Graduation is just around the corner, and I kinda need certain classes to graduate!

The thing that makes this crazy time of year wonderful is the Advent season. Preparing for and anticipating the celebration of Christ's birth. The fresh snow we actually have on the ground! The pretty little 5 1/2 foot tree in the corner of my room, stuffed full of presents nicely wrapped for my family. It's cold but hey, i'm an Alaskan and we like the cold! Even in the midst of the stress, this time of year is still one of my favorites.

At the moment, I am taking a "brain break" from my Hebrew final. The papers and tests are slowly winding down. My big stressor exegetical paper is finally done. Having this accomplished has taken a huge weight off my shoulders. In all, if it was double spaced it would have been 17 or so pages. After a week of staying up till between 2-4:30am, it is in the professors hands and finally out of mine!

My foot is slowly doing better. The physical therapist gave me a scare the other day by telling me he didn't see it getting much better. He felt I would probably always have the feeling of walking on a rock. According to him, I have basically no arch support anymore and there is little to protect my metatarsals from each other, which causes the rock feeling. I left his office feeling extremely burdened. He is looking for solutions to try and help the foot, but I did not get the sense he was confident about what he would find.

Thankfully, I have felt a small improvement this week. I have spoken with others, including my chiropractor who specializes in neurology. Most have expressed my feelings that I am less than a month out of surgery and my foot is still quite huge. It needs time to heal, and I need to keep working on it to loosen the scar tissue. I will never be 100%, but I doubt I will always be this bad. I do plan to call my doctor on monday to discuss what was said by the physical therapist, just to get his opinion (and reassurance!).

So, it's been quite a week! I feel so blessed to be at the end of my second to last semester. I will deeply miss this place, but am very much ready to take the next step. After almost 8 years of higher education, it is time to move on!

Hope you all are having a great week. I'm ready for some hot cocoa and a Christmas movie! Maybe I should finish my final first though...

The Joy's of PT

2007-11-30T18:15:00.000-08:00

I don't know about the rest of you, but I think physical therapists find extreme joy in their work. It seems the more pain your in, the more their excitement rises. Makes you wonder, doesn't it?!

In case you haven't guessed, I began physical therapy today. It is my second go around, the other was before my first foot surgery. Thankfully, the PT was a really nice guy and was surprisingly gentle today. Although my foot hurts more this time around, the PT was actually easier!

I know as time goes on, he will get more aggressive. Today was more of an assessment to see where I am at. I was pleased to find out I am actually way ahead of the game! He told me my range of motion is where people typically are in week four (i'm only 2 1/2 weeks out), which is great.

The biggest struggle I will be facing is all the scar tissue. After two surgeries, there is a ton of it. Walking is by far the hardest thing to do; it feels like i'm walking on marbles and my big toe does not like to move. Hopefully if i'm aggressive enough, i'll work through it in no time!

Other than that, i'm in the midst of the last couple weeks of classes. Although i'm escatic at the idea of being done for the semester (1 more to go!), i'm so nervous about getting everything done. I've had to take extensions on some work, which I hate. It makes it so much more intense to make up the work plus the other things that are due. I know i'll get through it, I just have to pick at it one paper at a time.

This monday is the big day in regards to the call process. My paperwork for call/assignment is due into the ELCA headquarters in Chicago. The papers are very intense and have really forced me to look at my call, skills, and theology. I'm excited to have this done and in the office. In case your wondering, this is my resume type paperwork. Part of it goes to the Bishops during my assignment to a region and then synod; the other part goes out to churches that consider me for call. Pretty intense/exciting stuff!

Alright, speaking of all of that, I should probably get to it! Thank you for all of the comments to my last post. Sometimes I really wonder if i'm just talking to myself. If I am, that's okay. Writing really is therapeutic!

Here is a picture of my foot as it looks now. I hope it doesn't gross anyone out. Some have been curious and asked to see. As I aim to please, here it is! The swelling and bruising is really down a lot; you should've seen it two weeks ago!

Goodbye Boot!

2007-11-27T18:02:00.000-08:00

Whew, surgery is OVER! I had my foot surgery two weeks ago, and am finally starting to get back to normal (well...somewhat). I was quite surprised at how painful the first week was. Honestly, I was not prepared in the least. The first few days it felt like the entire foot was on fire. After doubling the pain meds, I felt much better. *smile*

It turned out that there was much more in my foot than expected. My doctor was shocked to find I had not one but two neuromas in my left foot. To top it off, they were two of the biggest neuromas the doctor had seen all year.

The bone spur on the joint of my big toe was about 1/4 inch thick. He said they basically fractured my big toe and then cut off spur. I have to say this has been the roughest part of the recovery.

So, aside from the scars from my last surgery, I have three lovely new incisions: one is around 2 inches long, the other two about 1inch each. My foot looks like it has been through one tough battle. I still have quite a bit of pain, tingling, shocking feelings, and swelling. Then of course I have the permanent numbness. I am adjusting and I think not having the boot will help with this. I am so glad it is over.

My doctor is very, very happy with the progress made already, and thinks I will feel a whole lot better once all the healing has occurred. I am so blessed to have him as my surgeon and that everything has been taken care of. Hopefully, this is the last of my surgeries and I will be back to the gym, snowtubing, and long battlefield walks very soon.

Thank you for all your prayers, emails, and support. I apologize it took so long to update. I'm in the middle of finals, so it has been hard to balance my recovery, papers, and updates!

Hooray for Future Happy Feet!

2007-11-01T20:52:00.000-07:00

Cutie Patootie Katharina peering off the couch

Hooray, I have a surgery date! I'll be sliced and diced on November 12th, only a mere 11 days from now. It is exciting and nerve-racking all at the same time.

Thankfully, the surgeon is an amazing person and is reworking his schedule just to fit me in. They had no openings until January, which will not be a good month for me school wise. What a blessing this doctor is; I will forever be grateful for the generosity he has shown towards me throughout this process.

This week has been a jam packed one. We had Luther Colloquy at Seminary, which is a day long seminar on Luther's theology. Honestly, I never really get into the lectures, but the socializing is great! We had so many of my old friends here who have graduated or are on internship. It was great to forget about school, feet, and call papers for a couple days and just enjoy the company. That, accompanied with school and surgery scheduling stuff made for a fun week!

Alright, it is time to cut this blog a bit short and get to bed. I've been doing the "stay up till 2am" gig a few nights too many and need to get back to a real schedule (wow, do I sound old). The next 11 days will be crazy with doctor appointments and trying to work ahead in classes. Probably shouldn't be writing call/assignment papers and exegeticals while i'm on happy drugs!

School, Cranky Foot, and a Moody Cat to Boot!

2007-10-27T20:08:00.000-07:00

Well, I am finally over half way done with my second to last semester (not that i'm counting or anything). It is amazing how I went from actually being excited to be in class to being overwhelmed with senioritis all in about a couple weeks. This is the third bout of senioritis I have had in life, and I am ready to NEVER have it again. Eight years of college is more than enough for this lady!

Speaking of senioritis, I think it has actually spread to the cats. Melanchthon, the lovely kitty cat above, is becoming extremely moody. It actually seems like he is more than done with the campus life. The break outs from our room are becoming more frequent and he likes to hang out at the fire doors, planning a real escape. To top it off, he is actually beating on Katharina for no apparent reason! She will be lying around, minding her own business, and he will just come up and whap her on the head! What a little beast. He may look cute, but he is definitely not Mr. Innocent.

In the midst of this fun-filled semester of courses, call/assignment papers, and the upcoming Approval interview in Anchorage, my annoying left foot is getting more and more cranky by the day. For those who do not know, I had decompression surgery in July for Morton's Neuroma (tumor-like substance wrapped around the nerve). The surgery failed miserably to say the least. My foot is so cranky that even as I sit here typing there is a pulse throbbing right in the ball of my foot. It seems there is either always a dull ache, electrice shocks, or the pulse. I kinda prefer the dull ache!

So, this semester I will be having yet another surgery. All of the conservative treatments i've had since last February have not worked, so I will be having the part of the neuroma with the tumor on it removed, along with a bone spur on the joint of my big toe. This bone spur has also been quite painful, so let's chop that sucker off too.

I really hope all of this helps, as I don't want to be dealing with this problem during graduation time and my first call. I miss being active so much. This foot thing has made me a big ole blob. I can't even walk to class without the foot bothering me. There are so many things that are way worse than this, and I am very grateful to be an overall healthy 27 year old. I think the best thing about this thing is it has helped me see how truly blessed we healthy people are to be able to do the everyday things. Not being able to walk two blocks without hurting has really helped me see a small glimpse of what it must be like for all the shut-ins I visit. As whiny as this entry is, I do feel grateful for this chance to gain some perspective. A little neuroma is nothing compared to what so many in our world face day in and day out with nothing that will ease their pain.

So, here's to hoping my next entry will be a neuroma free one! I should find out this week when surgery is, and will be sure to let you know.

Goodbye Vicar Life, Hello Seminary!

2007-09-24T21:38:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone!

I know, it has been another long stretch since my last update. I really do apologize, life just got too chaotic.

I finished internship on August 29th in a whirlwind of activity. For two weeks out of August I was on my own while the pastors were on a mission trip to Honduras. Thankfully, no major crisis' arose during their absence, as I was busily packing up the apartment and working on the dreaded approval essay.

For those who do not know, the approval essay is a twenty page theological essay on trinitarian theology (topic changes each year). This is part of the last phase of the candidacy process to be ordained. Writing this paper was very difficult in the midst of saying goodbye to the congregation and moving to seminary. Thankfully, it is finished!

The transition from internship back to seminary went better than I anticipated. I was afraid that entering classes again would be difficult and the motivation to do schoolwork would be lacking. To my surprise, I am loving school and feel energized to learn. At the moment, I am taking: Hebrew, Ethics, Epistles, Mission Strategies, and Integrative Seminar III. Integrative is a course taken each year, depending on what year of schooling you are in. It is simply a reflective type course and the curriculum in it is very light. At the moment, I am loving each course for very different reasons. The language of Hebrew is not required at this seminary, but I am very thankful I chose to take it. I am finding it fascinating and learning the language is very much like doing a difficult puzzle. It is a good thing I love puzzles!

The day after arriving back at seminary, my younger sister Jamie arrived for a twelve day vacation. I am so grateful we scheduled this trip, as it was just what I needed after the emotional goodbye from Zion. We went to Philadelphia and toured the Independence Hall area and went to the Franklin Institute. It was very cool! I would attach pictures but Jamie still hasn't sent them (hint hint Jamie!).

We then went up to New York City to see the broadway production of Spamalot. For anyone who loves Monty Python I HIGHLY suggest it! It was so much fun and relaxing. For the first time, I chose to stay at a hotel right outside Philadelphia before going to New York. This made it so I wasn't exhausted from driving four hours up, spending the day in the city, then trekking back to Gettysburg all in the same day. I really don't know what ever compelled me to do it that way in the first place!

The rest of our trip we spent going to places around Gettysburg, such as: Lancaster, Harper's Ferry (beautiful), Hershey Park, and even the York County Fair. Jamie and I competed against each other to win the biggest stuffed animals, resulting in a massive pile on my couch! If anyone wants one, let me know!

Now that Jamie is gone and most of my boxes are unpacked, the cats and I are just trying to settle back into seminary life. It is surreal being back. The school still feels like home, yet part of me feels like it is still missing. I loved doing ministry at Zion so much and cannot wait to get back out again. As much as I love school, I love doing ministry in a congregation even more.

This wednesday I would like to ask you to please keep me in prayer. At 9:30am, I will be in my Faculty Approval Panel. This is the second to the last step towards being approved for ordination. In my book, it is the most scary. I will be sitting down with two faculty members of the seminary to be interviewed based on my approval essay, my years in seminary, internship, and discerning my call to the ministry. I know deep down I have nothing to be nervous about as I do believe God is calling me to the ordained ministry. I think my nerves are the result of wanting to be ordained so much, the thought of not being ordained rips me apart. From the sounds of it, the rest of the senior class is right there with me. So, I ask that you not only keep me in prayer, keep the whole class in your prayers. When this is all over I think i'll need to treat myself to a movie or something!

Aside from all of that, I am looking forward to going home for Christmas. I am sure many of you are rolling your eyes at me right about now! I just bought my ticket to go back to Seattle in December. I miss my family terribly, and haven't been back to Seattle since last Thanksgiving. During Christmas vacation, it sounds like I will be having the last of my approval interviews. This will be with my candidacy committee from Alaska and is the most important step in the process. They have the final say over whether or not I will be ordained. I will update you when I know the date for sure. I think it will be my greatest Christmas present. Not having that hanging over my head during the holidays will be wonderful!

So, as you can see it has been a very busy month. Thank you all for being such an incredible support. I will try and make these updates for frequent now that I am more settled. Please do not hesitate to write at any time to update me on how you are doing. In the meantime, know that you are all in my prayers.

Laura

New Prayer Site (just moved it this weekend!): http://www.asherandjacobsfriends.com/

Asher and Jacob's Site: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/asherandjacob

My Blog: http://www.laurathevicar.blogspot.com/

Last Internship Sermon

2007-08-26T12:40:00.000-07:00

“Transitioning by Faith”
Vicar Laura Lynn
August 19, 2007

It is that time of year again. The summer is quickly winding down, for some too fast, for others too slowly. Most have the school supplies purchased, unless you are like me and put everything off till the last minute. Children are getting ready for school, young adults are getting ready for college. Here at Zion, we are getting ready for Rally day, afterburners, horseback riding trips, and the hayride. In the midst of all of this, we are also making the transition of my departure and the beginning of a new year with Vicar Jeff. It is the time of year that we all look towards with excitement, mixed with a little fear and sadness; it is transition time.

If you are like most Lutherans, you dread change. It is one of the most dirty words in our denominations language. What draws many of us to the Lutheran church is that we like things to stay the same. If we do make a change, it is typically small and includes the criteria of being our idea and must include some minor kicking and screaming. We like things to stay the same.
Yet here we are, faced with a period of many changes. There are those changes we face every year, such as a new school year or aging another year. There are also those changes that are frightfully new to us. Health crisis’, divorce, moving from our home, loss of a job. No matter what the change is, one thing is for certain; all of us in this room are in the midst of some kind of transition.

It is difficult for me to believe that I am a mere ten days away from saying goodbye to you. I’ll admit, this is one of the more difficult transitions that I have faced in recent years. Having become such a part of this family, saying goodbye has been made more difficult than I expected it would be when I first came.

In our Hebrews passage, we read of a long line of people throughout our history who have been faced with some sort of trial. We read of the great Exodus out of Egypt, The wall of Jericho falling, of Rahab, Gideon, Samuel, and the like. All of these great people throughout our history were faced with trials and transitions that were far greater than the goodbye we will say next week.

What I take from this passage and the verses preceding it is the simple phrase, “by faith.” By faith Abraham made his home in the promised land, by faith Isaac blessed Jacob and Esau, by faith Moses left Egypt…always faced with major transitions, but always by faith.
It is only by faith that we can be faced with transitions and be comforted in knowing that Christ’s presence in with us. These great cloud of witnesses attest to that. We may not always understand the purpose of why we are faced with certain things, but we can face them head on, knowing by faith that we will be brought through our times of trial.

I will admit that last year at this time I had a very sour stomach regarding coming to internship. The fear that filled my heart and mind was far worse than even the transition into seminary. For the first time since I was three years old, I would not be in an academic setting. For the first time in my life, I would have an entire year of not only applying the things I had learned, but I would actually be in a pastoral kind of role. The thought was enough to make me keel over (and at times it did).

Imagining the mistakes that I would make, the battles I might face with cranky parishioners, the thought of preaching, chanting, and possibly not getting along with my supervisors was more than I could bear. I did not feel ready to have any sort of leadership role in a parish. Sure, I had been a Christian Education director for many years, but that was far different in my mind. This would be a horribly challenging year.

Of course, this year turned out nothing like my worst fears. I stepped into this role by faith and experienced the joy and beauty that comes with full-time ministry. I was told by the seminary the honeymoon period of internship would last approximately three months; it is now going on 12. I have loved just about every moment of being here. And I learned what it means to approach a transition by faith.

I learned that in transitioning by faith, we are called to be Witnesses. We witness to the fact that even though our time of transition may be utterly frightening, we are called to trust that God’s plan is so much greater; just as it has been throughout history.
I learned that by faith we are called to Hope. We are to have hope that although we may not always understand God’s plan, by faith we can have hope that we will be brought through our times of trial.
I learned that by faith we are called to Inclusion. We are included in a great community, which can be seen in this congregation. It is a community of believers who are sewn together by faith through Jesus Christ. We are called to be in this community to support, pray for, and love one another. It is a community that is there even when we transition into a new place.
I learned that by faith we are called to Need. We are called to need each other and to be served by the Body of Christ. No one can transition by faith without the support of others.
I learned that by faith we are called to Encourage. When faced with any of life’s transitions, we need to have encouraging feedback, whether it comes in the form of prayers, physical help, or loving words. We need to be encouraged that Christ is present in our midst through the community of believers.

I learned that by faith we are called to Respond. We are called to respond to God’s calling in our life, even if it is not what we would have wanted or expected. As I have said many times, I did not want to be a pastor. I did not want to spend my life serving God in a congregational setting. But, that is what makes it a call. We are all called by God to ministry in some form, and it is only by faith that we can discern our response.

As you can see, I learned this year to be a WHINER. Yes, as most of you know, the nickname given to me this year was the whiney Vicar. In discerning what exactly this means for me, I have decided it means far more than being a complainer. It means more than my supposed kicking and screaming about certain tasks. To me, being a whiner is my response to God. By faith, we are all called to be whiners. We are called to: witness, to hope, to include, to need, to encourage, and to respond.

So, when you think back on this year, remember. Although I was always accused of being the whiney vicar, we are all called to be whiney. And it is only by faith that we can truly be a whiny congregation. As we transition into this new year and go our separate ways, this is my prayer for you. That God would continue working in each of your lives, using you as his great cloud of witnesses. By faith you all answered God’s call to serve this community, including me. I pray as you enter this new year with Vicar Jeff, God would use you to show him what it means to be a whiner as well. Amen.

Hoping To Reimerge Soon!

2007-08-19T18:15:00.000-07:00

I know my updates have been few and far between lately; thank you for being so patient!

At the moment, I am scrambling to get my approval essay finished (due Sept 1). For those who do not know, this is the last part of the candidacy process, which lasts for the four years of seminary. The essay is about 20 pages long and is based on Trinitarian theology. This is to see how well the candidate is able to articulate their theology and call to ministry. After the paper is done, I will meet with a faculty panel at the seminary and my candidacy committee back in the Northwest. It is both exciting and terrifying. If I do well, I will be approved for ordained ministry. Yikes!

In the midst of all this, I have just preached my last sermon at my internship site. This upcoming Sunday (26th) will be my last at the church. Honestly, I have not had much time to grieve this loss, and may not until I am back on campus. It is truly a loss in many ways, as the year has been amazing and I have a deep love for this congregation. Part of being in ministry is having to really say goodbye. We are not supposed to stay in contact with the congregation members, as it would greatly affect their ability to move on to bonding with the new minister. So, the goodbyes are truly goodbyes.

Please, if you could, be in prayer for not only myself but also for the congregation as we approach these next ten days. It will be a crazy ten days for sure, and I am looking forward to being able to move past this period into calmer days! I would especially like to ask for prayers that I finish my approval essay and that the work that is done will be of quality. Last minute writing can be a little iffy!

More updates to come...

Long Overdue Update

2007-07-10T13:40:00.000-07:00

Hello All!

Many have been asking for an update, so I figure it is high time to update you all on Vicar life!

I am not even certain when my last update was sent out to you, so I will try and backtrack a bit. Sabbatical did go wonderfully, and was probably as smooth as a month in a large parish could have been. I found the time with the pastors away gave me a much needed boost in my confidence level. Since the month away, they have left a couple more times, and the time alone now seems completely natural. I am very comfortable in the role of minister, and know that God has given me these alone times to help me grow in my independence.

Last month, we held our Vacation Bible School. I was "Rowdy the cowgirl" for the week and the kids loved it. I had to break out of my comfort zone and get really goofy in some ridiculous skits. Although a bit humiliating, I must admit I enjoyed being silly for the week. It was a great time and another chance to bond with the families.

Just a couple days after VBS finished, we went into a week of confirmation camp. This is a wonderful program some of the pastors in the area have been doing for over 20 years. The kids loved it, as did the adults. It was awesome to watch their progression not only in knowledge, but in their relationships with God and each other. No matter where I end up in ministry, I would love to participate in a program like this, as it truly leaves an impact on all involved.

A week after camp, my father and stepmother flew in for a much needed week of vacation. We took off to Gettysburg, Washington DC, and Strasburg (right outside Lancaster). We had the chance to explore the Smithsonian, had a private tour of the Capital building (thanks to a congressman I know), and watched the fireworks over the Washington monument on the 4th of July. On Tuesday night we got to witness a sunset ceremony at the Iwa Jima memorial done by the Marines. There were many other great moments in this trip and I could go on forever. Although it was jam packed with activity, it still provided me with some much needed rest away from work. It helped me realize the importance of taking time away from the congregation you are serving. Although I love work, I am human and needed a break!

This week I head out for Family Camp. It is a five day program with about 50 some odd members of our congregation. There are twelve families participating and many call it the highlight of the year. I have been looking forward to it since I arrived, though I know there will be many "humiliate the Vicar" opportunities. They tell me this is because the love me! *smile*.

Aside from this, I have been having a minor annoyance with my foot. I have tried to keep this as quiet as possible, only telling those necessary, as it seems so silly to me. I have a small growth on my nerve (morton's neuroma) that started as a series of charlie horses and is now in constant discomfort. It has been going on since February and as all other conservative treatments have failed, I will be having a minor surgery on the 20th to cut the ligament between two toes; this is called decompression surgery. I hate to even bring it up, but if you could keep me in your prayers that all goes well, it would be appreciated. It is a very quick procedure, but necessary. I really hope it relieves the discomfort, as I have come to realize a painful foot is not a helpful thing in the busy life of an intern. Thankfully, there is a wonderful team of doctors and physical therapists in the congregation who have taken over caring for this problem. I am so grateful for their care.

As you can see, I have loved every moment of my internship, even with a bad foot. As the summer nears a close, I am preparing myself emotionally and spiritually for the move back into seminary life. It will be very difficult to part from this place I have called home and the congregation that has become like family to me. They have treated me with nothing but love and respect. Each person has taken on the role of teacher in a way I could not have imagined. There is nothing about internship that I have disliked, and I know that is a rare thing. My time here ends on August 26th, and I ask that you would hold the congregation and myself in prayer as that transition takes place. Please also keep the new Vicar and his family in your prayers as they begin their time serving at this wonderful place.

Thank you for all your prayers and support. If you have a moment, let me know how you are doing!

Laura

Trinity Sunday Sermon

2007-06-03T18:51:00.001-07:00

There is nothing greater in life than watching a child discover something for the first time. Back in January, I went to Oklahoma to visit one of my closest friends. Her little boy, Asher, who I proudly declare my nephew, was still a young infant. One day during my visit, both parents had to be at work so I eagerly took on the task of babysitting him. I had him on the couch and we were having fun, looking at toys and making faces. I sat for a moment, and just observed him. He started to grab for his toy and just stopped. His eyes got really big as he stared at his hand, moving it back and forth and back and forth. You could watch and see the mystery unfolding in his little mind. It was as if he was realizing for the first time that this thing that he uses to grab stuff is actually a part of him. He has control over his hand. He then stuffed his hand in his mouth, took it out, and stared again. You could see that he was kind of like, “wow! I can put this in my mouth and suck on it.” “Oh look, I can take this thing and grab something I want.” I can even grab the other hand and stuff both in my mouth” It was absolutely the most awesome thing to witness. This young boy was putting all of the pieces together in his mind, unraveling a great mystery.
Today is what we call on the church calendar Trinity Sunday. It is unlike most Sundays in the church in that the focus is not on a particular story from scripture, but rather on what most would say is the most important doctrine of the Christian church. Today, we are called to look at the doctrine of the Trinity and try to piece together the great mystery that is the relationship between the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
I read once that if a person is to try and speak about the Trinity for more than two minutes, they begin to enter false teachings, also known as heresy. The reason this is believed by some to be true is the Trinity is in fact a mystery; it is beyond our ability to reason through. How can one explain how we have a God that is one essence but distinct in person? And when we say person, we don’t mean like the relation we have with three separate humans. Rather, this is to mean that each part of the Trinity is somehow distinct from each other but united in will and essence. Are you confused yet? I will admit, I am. That is what makes the Trinity a mystery. No one can exactly explain how God can be three in one and one in three. No one can explain how the entire Trinity has been united from the beginning, from creation, and still united on the cross and united in the sacraments, and united for all eternity. It is truly a mystery.
We, in our human nature, desire to find an explanation for everything. How do we cure cancer? How come one sock is always lost in a load of laundry? How come Paula Abdul breaking her nose gets more headlines than those who died in Iraq the same day? How is Christ truly present in the bread and the wine? Or even like Asher, how does each member of our body interact with each other? We have questions upon questions upon questions, most of which will never have an answer.
In our consumerist society, we are always trying to find information as fast as possible. Studies say that in our world today, information doubles every two years. We thrive on knowing as much as possible as fast as possible. Books are becoming less important in our world as the information does not come nearly as fast as it does on the internet. Even for me, in looking for information on the Trinity for this sermon, I found it much more simple to hop onto the internet than to pull out my old dusty text books. Professors of mine have published most of their notes on the internet. I found the information I desired in less than half the time it would have taken me to walk to the shelf, pull out a notebook, and leaf through the pages. We desire for the answers to come quick and easy.
In our Christian faith, we learn that information does not always come to us, and when it does, it doesn’t come as fast and as easy as we would like. The hard knocks we experience prove this to us. Why our prayers are not always answered the way we would like. Why we struggle to forgive even though we know we should. And even the simple questions, like the one the third and fourth graders wanted answered in Sunday school this week about how dinosaurs fit into the creation story. We don’t always know the answers, and when we think we have sometimes found them, they don’t always come in the time frame we would like.
Why do we always feel the need to have all the answers? We are constantly trying to de-mystify the things in life which cannot be explained. We believe we need to know and we need to know now. This is one of the most awesome yet frustrating parts about our relationship with God. Christianity is not about how. It is not about when or even why. It is about who. Who created us? Who created dinosaurs? Who comes in the form of bread and wine? Who forgives us? Who gives us everlasting life? Who is always working in all things? The only thing we need to know is that God is always at work. Who is much more significant in our faith lives than the how questions. We cannot explain the great mysteries of God because if God wanted us to know, we would have the answers. How can God come in the form of three persons yet still be one? It is not for us to know. That is what makes our relationship to God one of faith.
In our gospel lesson for this Sunday, we hear about the Spirit guiding us in truth, who will continue the work of the Trinity in our lives today. It is here that we learn that the truth will be revealed to us only when we are able to hear it. The mysteries of the faith are not always going to be revealed. If and when we are ready, the knowledge and words will come. The Spirit will continue the mission of the church through us, giving us the tools when and if we need them.
The mysteries within our faith offer us great lessons for living our daily lives. It is okay not to have all the answers. It is okay to say, “I don’t know”. Those of you in the adult Sunday school class are fully aware that when you ask me a question, I am not afraid to admit I do not have all the answers. We are simply human, and to accept the fact that some things will always remain a mystery is a healthy thing. How can faith play a role in our lives if we have evidence of all things? There would be no need for trusting in our God. All our questions would be answered. We would have all the evidence we ever needed that God does in fact exist. We would have complete clarity about what is written in scripture, we would know why prayers are answered the way they are.
There would be no need to have faith. Really, there would be no need for us to gather on this day in worship. There is a reason why we have these great mysteries. There is a reason God comes in the form of three distinct persons yet is of one essence. If we needed to understand why, God would provide the answers. But the greater reason, I believe, is for us to question, and for us to build in our faith and trust in our great God. When we are ready, the truth will be revealed, and we, like Asher, will look in amazement and awe as the mystery is unraveled. But until then, we can know that God’s plan is greater than anything we can reason, and we can proclaim all that Christ has revealed and rejoice in the mysteries of our faith. Amen.

Sabbatical

2007-05-05T11:39:00.000-07:00

It is hard to believe it has been so long since I last posted! I guess you can say things have been a wee bit busy. Oh well, thankfully it was a "good busy".

Since my last post, I have almost officially survived Sabbatical. The Pastors will be returning Wednesday of this upcoming week; I think I am ready for their return. The secretary and I have found a new norm in the office, and it will definitely be an adjustment to go back to how things were originally. I did miss them though, and look forward to working with them again. They are truly amazing supervisors.

To my surprise, things were very quiet over the last month. I never would have thought I would describe the month on my own as smooth, but really, it was! Yes, my first Sunday I did have a surprise in the supply Pastor not coming, leaving me approximately two hours to write a sermon. The following week I lost my voice as a result of strep throat FIVE MINUTES before my first service. That was most certainly not the smoothest of services. But really, those were the biggest crisis'. I also made a bad mistake that was embarrassing and a good learning experience. We won't go into that, but I will say I learned from it, nothing life-altering happened, and I think things are okay. It was something I had to be reminded of and I am glad it happened the way it did. So, if these were the worst things to happen on sabbatical, life is good.

I discovered during this month that I am more capable than I have ever given myself credit for. The Holy Spirit, to my surprise, really has I believe chosen me for this form of ministry. I am not captive to my insecurities but instead am captive to being a servant of Christ. This is probably the greatest lesson I have learned thus far. So often, I find myself looking at my life with so much humility that I forget what a great creation God has made in me. I learned I need to stop focusing so much on what I am not gifted in and see the gifts that are there to be used for the glory of God. It is truly amazing to discover how great we really are because of whose we are.

So, as you can see, it has been a good month. I have been supported, loved, prayed for, and equipped with newfound gifts through serving in this congregation. I could not be more blessed with being assigned to this internship site, and I am looking forward to seeing where I go next.

Speaking of where I go next, that part of my life is drawing eerily close. This upcoming June, I will be given the packet to write my approval essay. This is the final step of the candicacy process to be approved for ordination. It is scary yet exilariting to finally be here. It is during the writing of this long long long long essay that I will also have to be thinking about and praying about what region I would like to be assigned to. I have an idea of where I would like to be, but really need to focus in on discerning if this is my desire or God's. I ask that you would join me in praying that God would guide this whole process. I know that wherever I am placed (and honestly I do not have much of a say), God will do ministry through me and in turn I will be blessed. It is just so hard to let go of my own desires and open myself up to the possibility I may have to yet again relocate to an entirely new place. Big moves are hard!

Alright, I am off to get myself ready for tonight's service. Hope you are all doing well.

Updated slideshow of my beautiful nephews. Can you believe how far Asher has come?!

2007-04-11T18:03:00.000-07:00

Make photo slide shows at onetruemedia.com

Easter Vigil

2007-04-07T16:31:00.000-07:00

I found this on one of my seminary friend's site, and thought it very appropriate for this night. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did:

The Following is an excerpt from the Ancient Easter Hymn, the Exultet, translated into English:

"Let now the heavenly hosts of angels rejoice let the living mysteries be joyfully celebrated: and let a sacred trumpet proclaim the victory of so great a King.Let the earth also be filled with joy, illuminated with such resplendent rays; and let men know that the darkness which overspread the whole world is chased away by the splendor of our eternal King.

Let our mother the Church be also glad, finding herself adorned with the rays of so great a light and let this temple resound with the joyful acclamations of the people...It is truly fitting and just to proclaim with all the affection of our heart and soul, and with the sound of our voice the invisible God the Father almighty, and his only Son our Lord Jesus Christ.Who paid for us to his eternal Father the debt of Adam: and by his sacred blood canceled the guilt contracted by original sin.

For this is the Paschal solemnity, in which the true Lamb was slain, by whose blood the doors of the faithful are consecrated.This is the night in which thou formerly broughtest forth our forefathers, the children of Israel, out of Egypt, leading them dry-foot through the Red Sea. This then is the night which dissipated the darkness of sin by the light of the pillar.This is the night which now delivers all over the world those that believe in Christ from the vices of the world and darkness of sin, restores them to grace, and clothes them with sanctity.

This is the night in which Christ broke the chains of death, and ascended conqueror from hell.For it availed us nothing to be born, unless it had availed us to be redeemed.O how admirable is thy goodness towards us! O how inestimable is thy love! Thou hast delivered up thy Son to redeem a slave.O truly necessary sin of Adam, which the death of Christ has blotted out!O happy fault, that merited such and so great a Redeemer!

O truly blessed night, which alone deserves to know the time and hour when Christ rose again from hell.This is the night of which it is written: And the night shall be as light as the day, and the night is my illumination in my delights.Therefore the sanctification of this night blots out crimes, washes away sins, and restores innocence to sinners, and joy to the sorrowful. It banishes enmities, produces concord, and humbles empires.

Good Friday Sermon

2007-04-06T13:15:00.000-07:00

“Were you there, when they crucified my Lord?” The hymn that we sing on this day called Good Friday, poses a complex yet simple question. Were we there? Were we there, when they nailed him to the tree? Were we there when they laid him in the tomb? The answer is yes. We were there. We were there, before Christ with every sinful thing we have ever done, every sinful thing we have ever thought, every sinful thing we have not yet realized. In Jesus’ outstretched arms on the cross, he reached out to take on every sin of the past, every sin of the present, and every sin that is yet to come. Were we there? Yes. We were there as ones who have murdered others with our words. We were there as those who have lusted after things that are not ours. We were there as those who are jealous, as those who have worshipped idols, as those who have taken the Lord’s name in vain. We were there, laying down our burdens before the one who loves us more than we can possibly comprehend. We were there.

Today, Good Friday, we take the journey with Jesus. We journey with him because this is our journey to take. We are the guilty ones, we are the ones who should be tried and executed. So we go with him. We feel the pain of knowing someone else is suffering on our behalf. We watch as he is mocked, we watch as he is found guilty of a crime he did not commit, we watch him stumble from exhaustion towards Golgotha. We listen to the cries of pain as the nails are driven through his flesh and bone. We hear his words of grace and forgiveness when he tells the criminal next to him that today he will be with him in paradise. And we witness his last breath.

We are witnesses to the death of our Lord. The sacrifice that God did not have to give, but did because of unconditional love. Through Jesus, we are redeemed. And so we are called to lay our burdens down. We are called to accept the healing that comes from his pain, from his blood, from his death.

This week, my home congregation in Petersburg, Alaska has taken on the task of healing. After years of brokenness from conflicts with each other and pastors that have come and gone, they are working with the interim pastor to find resolve so they can call a new pastor. Because there is so much heartache and anger towards the past, the pastor has taken this Holy Week to help them find healing. At the foot of the cross in the church, he has placed a paper shredder. Here, they are encouraged to write their feelings on paper, share it with someone they trust, asking them to be in prayer, and then proceed to the foot of the cross where they will find a paper shredder. With that shredder, they are to shred what they have written as a symbol of laying their burdens down at the foot of the cross. Then, at their Easter vigil they will burn the shreds of paper during the opening liturgy.

The actions of our brothers and sisters in Petersburg represents the call of the cross for us today. Today, Good Friday, we are called to be present with Christ at the cross. Jesus did not face the crucifixion to have us hang on to our sins. He did it so that we could lay our burdens down at the foot of the cross. His death was to be the death of our old selves.

By hanging on to our sins, our jealousy, bitterness, despair, we are ignoring the cross that Christ bore on our behalf. In not releasing our sin we are saying that Christ’s death was not enough. He did not suffer enough mockery, he did not experience enough rejection, he did not bleed enough, he did not struggle enough for each breath. We are saying we need more in order to be forgiven. We need to suffer more in order to be forgiven. We need to be rejected, we need to be mocked, we need to bleed. But the truth is, it is not about our suffering. It is not about what we have done for God. It is about what Christ has done for us. He is the sacrifice, hung on a cross on our behalf. The struggle we face lies in finding a way to release our burdens and trusting that Jesus’ sacrifice was enough.

A couple of years ago, when I was serving as a chaplain at Hershey Medical Center, I was called to a patients room in the middle of the night. She was a younger woman, married with small children and had just been diagnosed with cancer. I was in the middle of several trauma cases and was not able to make it up there until very late in the night, but she requested that I wake her. When I finally had the time to visit her, she shared with me her fears and concerns. She was overwhelmed with grief and felt that God was punishing her for all of the awful things she had done in the past. In her mind, it was impossible that God could ever forgive her for the hurt that she had caused others, and that maybe this was God’s way of helping her atone for her sins.

To sit in her room and listen to her story, my heart broke for her. To hear of the guilt that she had been feeling all of those years, and to know that she thought this was God’s punishment for her was unlike anything I had heard before. The concept of Jesus’ sacrifice being enough was something she struggled to understand. We talked and prayed for hours about how God’s love for us is so great that he gave Jesus as a sacrifice for our sins. We talked about how through Jesus’ stripes, we are healed.

I do not know what happened to this woman after our visit. When I was leaving, there was a calmness that had overcome her room. She seemed to be at peace and slept soundly the rest of the night. In the prayers we shared that night, she, like the people in Petersburg, took out her paper shredder and laid her burdens at the foot of the cross. For the first time in her life, she trusted that Jesus on the cross was atonement enough for her sins. The burden she had carried all those years was finally released. She had discovered the hope in knowing that Christ died for her sins.

Jesus’ work for us is enough. He has already taken on all of our sins, all our burdens. In recognizing that this has been done, we, like the woman at the hospital, can rest peacefully in knowing that Jesus has healed us through his body and blood. Nothing we have done in the past nor will do in the future can change the fact that Christ suffered and died on our behalf. The sacrifice has already been made.

Martin Luther, in a sermon he wrote for Good Friday said, “We are to consider Christ’s sufferings in a way that we are to be comforted by them. This takes place when we do not let our sins remain in our consciences, but lay them upon Christ and reflect upon the love of God and of Christ that shines forth out of these sufferings.”

Christ’s death evidences to us God’s ultimate act of love. It is the greatest gift ever to be offered us and frees us from the need to fear and worry. When Jesus died on the cross, we were there. The sins Christ took upon himself were not only the sins of those who lived before. They were not only the sins of the disciples who failed to stay awake on the mount of olives. They were not only the sins of Judas who betrayed him. The sins were not only those of the guards who arrested him, Pilate who failed to release him, the crowd that turned against him, or those who nailed him to the cross. The sins that were taken by Jesus the Christ were the sins of our grandparents, our parents, our brothers, our sisters, our children, our children’s children, ourselves. They are the sins of all who lived and all who are yet to come. Jesus came for all. Jesus suffered for all. Jesus died for all and his loving actions will continue for all. Amen

Halfway Through

2007-03-24T16:44:00.000-07:00

Well, actually I am almost seven months through! I can't believe how quickly the time has gone and feel so blessed to have had this experience. I look forward to what the last half of internship will bring.

At the moment, we are finishing up mid-year evaluations. These are nine-page evaluations that are written by myself, the pastors, and my internship committee. So far, the pastors and I have finished our evaluations and they look pretty good. We are on the same page and anything I need to work on is fairly minor, such as chanting and learning different styles of preparing a sermon. I look forward to Monday when I hear what the committee has to say.

In the church world, we are nearing Holy week. If I am to be completely honest with myself, I am totally exhausted. Sadly enough, today the craziness of Lent hit and I took a really long afternoon nap. This exhaustion was evidenced when yesterday I took a real, full day off and had a couple friends from seminary over (in pic above). We had a great time, but I found it very hard to relax. I have been go go go for so long, that to actually take time away from the normal busyness felt abnormal. This, to me, was a sign that I need to start making self-care a real priority. I always talk about how important it is to take care of yourself, but rarely take my own advice to heart. A lady at the church gave me a pass to the YMCA, and I think it is time to use it. I also think it is time for me to start setting aside time each week just to go out and do the things I love, like taking a drive to nowhere or going to the movies.

My being tired concerns me most because of the upcoming month long "mini-sabbatical" the pastors are taking right after Easter. I feel so completely competent to handle things while they are gone, but am worried I will already be tired going into it. Thankfully, the last time they were gone things seemed to be calmer than when they were here. If this is the case at least the first week they are gone, I think I will be good. Plus, if I get a day or two to just rest before, maybe that is all I need.

I think the real issue is I just hit a wall today. The last couple of weeks have been so busy I haven't had the time nor the energy to even talk to family and friends. Some were so concerned they called a ton just to find out if I was okay. For those who know me well know this is completely out of character. Normally i'm always on the phone. I think with the nap I took today and a quiet night at home tonight, I should be back to my normal, busy, happy self. Sleep and movies...there is no better therapy! :) Thank you, as always, for checking in and especially for your prayers.

Woo Hoo, It Has Begun!

2007-03-08T18:11:00.000-08:00

After many months of planning, I have FINALLY begun the new children's program at the church. It is a weekday program that is set up very much like vacation Bible school. We are doing a three month trial, and if it goes well, hopefully it will continue as a nine-month program next year.

Though we had a few bumps here and there, tonight went very well. We had 29 kids show up out of the 35 we were expecting. Two had not pre-registered so overall we are very happy. The kids and volunteers seemed to really enjoy themselves, and although I am exhausted, I had a great time as well.

This weekend I will be headed out for a Spiritual Retreat. We are being separated into two groups, the adults and the youth. I will be heading up the youth, along with another volunteer. We have ten kids going, which is a great turnout for this kind of event. I am basing our weekend on the book, "The Ragamuffin Gospel", by Brennan Manning. He leads many spiritual retreats throughout the country, so I thought it appropriate to use this book.

The title of our retreat will be "The Furious Love of God." We will be talking about grace in regards to our past, present, and future. I have chosen a quote by a theologian for each of the five sessions, and am pairing them up with a scripture passage. We will be doing a lot of discussion, journaling, prayer, and meditation. I am really looking forward to this weekend and think I may get just as much out of it as the youth...maybe even more!

Alright, that is it for now. I'm pretty much flat on my back this evening and need to get some new ice for my back. Last weekend I was pretty stupid and lifted a box of four filled Communion wine jugs with my back instead of my legs. Not the most intelligent thing I have ever done and now I am paying the consequences with a sprained back. I was doing fairly well with it until today. I think I overdid it working a twelve hour day. Tomorrow will hopefully be better and hey, at least i'm no longer tossing my cookies! :)

Tossing Cookies and Preaching

2007-03-01T17:40:00.000-08:00

This has been a very interesting week. I've been trying to hide the fact from as many people as possible that I have had a nasty stomach flu. I hate telling people that I am sick as it makes me feel like a weeny. I really thought it was going away so it was no big deal. Today, nature proved me wrong!

I was having a wonderful morning, thinking I had recovered from the demon that invaded my body Tuesday night. I finished the final details for my sermon, drank some yummy green tea, and was ready to preach at our ecumenical lenten lunch-in. I even ate a bite of a snack bar, one of the first things I had tried in days.

Then, the demon rumbled and rumbled some more. Only an hour before I was to preach, it came back full force. I probably feel worse now than I have the entire sickness. Ick.

So, as most ministers understand, you can't really bail out on preaching. It doesn't matter if they have to drag you in on a stretcher, IV pole, foley and all...the show must go on.

Amazingly, I made it through the sermon. The Pastor's helped out by reading the scripture and doing the benediction. I almost was ready for the benediction, but could not stand up after the sermon and prayers. The beast held on during the 9 minutes or so I was up there. Had I been up there one more minute, or even thirty seconds, I probably would've lost it. From what I understand I looked like something out of a horror flick, but at least I was there. One of the Pastor's says it was a good thing for an intern to experience. I will reexamine that thought when my head isn't hung over a toilet every few hours....

Ash Wednesday Sermon

2007-02-22T13:35:00.000-08:00

“Where Our Treasures Are”

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” This short verse became one of my favorites when I first began reading the Bible. I was about 14 at the time, and had justlost one of my best friends.

We had only known each other for about 6 months, becoming fast friends when I moved to Petersburg, Alaska. On my first day of school, Iza was one of the first people to come up to me and introduce herself. She had grown up in Poland and knew what it was like to be the new kid in school. Soon, her, myself, and about 4 other girls became a close-knit group who did everything together.

Although she wasn’t the best influence on me, she smoked and knew how to cause trouble, she was someone I could confide in. I cherished our friendship and she made me feel secure in a place that was so unfamiliar. I was so grateful to have people in my life I felt I could lean on and speak to openly.

That all changed one February morning. On the bus to school, an ambulance drove by, an unusual site for our small town. I did not think too much of it, and just let it drift from my mind. When I arrived at school, however, I knew something was not quite right. As it turned out, our dear friend Iza collapsed on her way to the bus and instantly died. We would find out later she had a heart condition that had never been diagnosed.

Although I had experienced the early death of a classmate a few years back, this loss was so different. She had become one of my closest friends. The loss devastated me and I think forever changed who I was. The grief felt unyielding and my other friends and I tried to work through the emotions that came in waves and the questions that naturally flowed with them.

This single experience I believe had the greatest influence on my relationship with God. I became angry, questioning how a loving God could take away someone so young, yet I also clung to my faith finding comfort in the presence of Christ that I felt so strongly. It was a time of uncertainty and growth for me. It was also a time where I came to have a greater understanding of what Jesus meant when he said, “Do not store up for yourselves treasure on earth, where moth and rust consume.” I realized that nothing on earth is permanent and no matter how hard I try, I cannot control the world around me.

Iza’s death was not the first upset I had experienced during that period in my life. We had just left the only home I ever knew back in Seattle. My life long friends were all back there. My parents had only separated about a year and a half prior, and my father and new stepmother were back in Seattle. How much more could I really take? My parents marriage was gone, my home in Seattle was gone, my friend Iza was gone. Nothing in my life could remain stable, other than Christ’s presence in my life.

Today, Ash Wednesday, is a day when we are reminded of our own mortality. As the ashes are smudged on our foreheads, we are faced with the realization that we are frail, imperfect, and solely dependent upon our Lord and Savior. The treasures that surround us in this world will perish, the only thing that will remain steadfast is our God.

The loss of my friend was the first time I really reflected on how everything in our lives can be lost in an instant. In our world, we strive to gain control of our finances, of our health, of our actions. We create laws as a way of controlling our society, and put locks on our doors in order to prevent chaos. When our health fails, we find every specialist in the country to help us prevent what will ultimately be an inevitable death. We crave the ability to prevent anything from occurring in our lives that would upset the stability we have strived to build.

It is during those times when everything falls apart around us that we are reminded of that simple yet complex phrase, “you are dust, and to dust you shall return”. When we feel the ashes upon us, when we look around at each other at the end of this service, we are reminded of the reality that we have no control. We cannot control the fact that we will die, no matter how much we want to. At some point, treatments will fail. Whether this is in weeks, months, or 20 years down the road, our bodies will give out.

We cannot control the fact that time and time again our peers will fail us. Classmates will betray us, saying things behind our backs. Secrets will be spilled in the uncontrollable need to gossip. At work, someone will want to get a promotion badly enough that they will go around us in order to get ahead. We cannot control the fact that at times, our laws will not be able to prevent us from being harmed. Bad people will still lurk in corners, selling drugs to our children, mugging the innocent, finding a way to break into our homes. 14 year old girls will still die. Parents will divorce. We will still be uprooted from places that make us feel secure. Our world is broken and full of broken people.

This is why Jesus tells us to store up treasures in heaven. We are not to depend upon a broken and fallen world, we are to depend upon a perfect and loving God. A God who has given us the greatest gift to ever be offered, the gift we will celebrate at the end of this 40 day journey. It is the gift in knowing that we do not have to strive for control, because the control is in his hands. It is the gift that although we mourn now, soon that mourning will be turned into joy. It is the gift of knowing that we are forgiven, time and time again, because we are given the gift of grace through the suffering of a loving God.

As we take this 40 day journey of Lent, we are reminded of our brokenness and dependence upon Christ. This is a time to deepen our spiritual lives, to look beyond our own brokenness and need to control our world, and look to the one who is ultimately in control. We cannot always prevent bad things from happening in our lives, but we can use these situations to look deeper into what it means to be dependent upon Christ.

When my friend died, I was compelled to go deeper in my journey of faith. Her death occurred right around this time of year, and it was my first introduction to Ash Wednesday. As I had the ashes smudged on my forehead and for the first time heard the words “you are dust and to dust you shall return”, I took time to really reflect on what those words meant. I was able look beyond the darkness of my grief, and looked towards the cross that was now marked on my forehead. I realized that even though we are so imperfect and our world is broken, that the ultimate gift is found on the cross. As we go through the dark times in our lives, as we make this journey called Lent, it leads us out of the darkness and into a new creation. A creation that is full of life, hope, and grace.

Although we are mere mortals, full of sin and frailities, we are gifted in knowing that the greatest treasures of our lives lie not in this world but in Christ our Savior. In the ashes we receive today, we are given a sign to remind us of our mortality and are need for repentance, yet we are also reminded of the grace that God gives us in the gift of eternal life. That is where our treasure lies. For all of these things in our world that we depend on will eventually pass away, but we can be sure that no matter what, Christ will always remain. Amen

Snow and Sermon

2007-02-14T13:42:00.000-08:00

Well, we finally have winter! Since yesterday, I would estimate we have had over a foot of snowfall, and it is still coming down. It is so beautiful and although I was looking forward to an early spring, I am glad we got a taste of a real winter snow. The only downfall was trying to shovel out my car this morning so they could plow the road. Man, did I feel how badly I need to start working out!

As you can see in the picture, my glasses are officially gone! Thanks to the generosity of an eye doctor in our congregation, I was able to get my eyes checked after seven years of not going

in. Unfortunately, our seminary insurance does not cover dental or vision, so both of these areas have gone unchecked. My vision was bad enough to where I could not see most street signs. So, now I can see beautifully! He convinced me to get contacts along with new glasses. Although hesitant to try sticking my finger in my eye, I tried the contacts and am learning to love them. It is so freeing to be able to see clearly, with a new prescription and no scratches, superglue, and other icky things on the lenses. I think I am going to stick with contacts from now on. Just one more person in our congregation who is a true blessing! It is my hope that he knows how

much his gift means to me. What a great example of what it means to live a life of service to Christ.

Things are going very well with the Pastors out of the country. So far there have been no major crisis' and I hope it stays that way! I am learning to take more authority which is one of the things we have been trying to working on.

My meeting for the new children's program went really well. I have 26 volunteers for the program and I think they are all very excited to get started. So far we have 17 kids signed up, so I really need to work on that. Hopefully we will have a great turnout and the congregation will want to continue the program on next year.

I did the worship services last week by myself. It was a wonderful experience and it was very humbling to hear all the kind comments. I must say it really gave me a much needed boost and demonstrated to me that I am truly competent to lead services alone. This next weekend I will have a supply preacher for the services, as it is a Communion Sunday. I cannot preside over Communion until I am ordained, so we needed someone in anyways. This will be nice for me as it will give me more time to focus on my Sunday school lesson, rather than trying to balance that with a sermon. My adult teaching skills aren't the greatest, so I need to put more energy into these lessons.

Alright, so I am going to go start dinner. Enjoy the sermon below; it is not my greatest, but I thought I would share it anyways. I have moved the Asher's friends list to it's own site if you are looking for it. There are many updates on it, so please go to: www.ashersfriends.blogspot.com and pray for all these kids.

"Blessed to be a Blessing"

Sermon- 6th Sunday after Epiphany

Many Sunday mornings, as I am getting ready for church, half asleep with a cup of hot tea in hand and typically my grapenuts with peaches, I sit and flip through my basic cable channels, trying to find something to watch in order to help myself wake up, if only just enough so I can function at the 8:15 service.

As most of you are probably aware, there is nothing good on television at 7am on a Sunday, unless you are a small child who enjoys power rangers. So, as I muddle though the channels, I typically land on one of the paid ½ hour advertisements. Many times, this is either advertising for one of those really cool magic bullet things that can make anything from a smoothie to cream of broccoli soup, or the advertisement is for something of more substance. It is to raise money for St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital, in order to help families who cannot afford their child’s medical treatment. Or it is for impoverished children suffering the effects of AIDS or years of drought. The pictures flash on the screen of little children with their ribs sticking out of their chests, their bellies distended from disease, flies eating at their skin. As hard as it is to watch their suffering, ultimately it is difficult to change the channel. The extent of their poverty and illness is unfathomable. It is unlike anything we see here in our community, and the suffering seems so far separated from us. In remembering these pictures, it is much easier to picture what Jesus is talking about when he says “blessed are the poor, for yours is the kingdom of God.”

When discussing Jesus’ love for the poor, liberation theologian Gustavo Gutierrez describes the reason his love is so strong is because they are living in an inhuman situation that is contrary to God’s will. I find this description of the poor to be applicable to more than those suffering the kind of devastating hardship the children on the paid TV advertisement are experiencing. This description of God’s love moves throughout all whom he calls blessed. It is contrary to God’s will that we suffer in any way. God does not desire for us to weep, to be hated, to hunger. When we see the children suffering through treatment for life threatening illness’ on the St Jude commercial, does God will that? I honestly do not think so. Yet then we go on to hear Jesus say, “woe to you” who are rich, who are laughing, who are spoken well of. Is it not God’s will that we be happy and live lives that are comfortable?

These are the questions and thoughts that filled my mind this week as I pondered our text for this Sunday. It is a text that many struggle over, including me, because upon first reading, it sounds as though the way we are living is not pleasing to God. It sounds as though we should rid ourselves of all possessions and live a life of poverty. The extreme side of me would even take it to mean having the clothes on my back is wrong. But, in reality, I really don’t think this is how Jesus expects us to interpret the text.

To me, this sermon is not a call to throw away all we own. It is not a call to inflict suffering upon ourselves so we can be blessed in the eyes of God. And it is certainly not a call to seek out persecution for the sake of Christ. Rather, I take this sermon as more of a call to a life of discipleship. Just prior to the sermon, Jesus had called his twelve disciples and they were just beginning their ministry together. The twelve had just left their homes and their possessions, and were devoting their lives to ministry. These drastic changes they had just experienced I am sure were overwhelming. They had gone from lives that were comfortable to lives full of service, poverty, and persecution for the sake of Christ.

The words of Jesus in this message were not necessarily words to praise people for being poor or to condemn those who were fed, but to call the people together in a life of service to one another in the name of Christ. It is a call for the disciples to not worry so much about what they had given up, but to focus on what they are gaining; fellowship in the Christian community.

The two extremes Jesus offers us in this sermon, of people suffering and others living in the lap of luxury, is contrary to God’s will. Why should others suffer while we live comfortably with more than enough to spare? We all have something to offer others, we are told this time and time again throughout scripture, that God has blessed us all with gifts in ministry. Here, in this sermon, is our call to use these gifts, to demonstrate God’s love to all our brothers and sisters through a life of discipleship. It is not a call to rid ourselves completely of what we have, but to share our gifts with each other. It is a call to bring a balance within our world. To offer others what we have so that all our needs are met.

We are reminded in Jesus’ sermon that we will all suffer. If we are laughing now, we will weep later. If we are filled now, someday we will be hungry. And if people are speaking well of us today, another day they will not. Some of our suffering may more inhuman than others, but we will all suffer nonetheless.

About four years ago, I was meeting with a counselor that I saw for about two years. During one of our sessions, we were talking about the divorce of my parents back when I was a child and the impact that it had on me throughout the years. At one point, I mentioned that it was no big deal, as so many others had suffered such greater heartaches than I had. Who was I to complain? His response to me was that there will always be another suffering a greater heartache than me, but that does not make the hurt any less painful.

Someone will always be in greater pain than ourselves. It seems there is always someone in our world whose pain is worse than what we are experiencing. The children we see on television, living in third world countries, are suffering greatly with hunger and disease. Their pain is evident in their faces as they live each day with the fear that they will be cold, hungry, and abandoned. Here, in our church today, many of us are suffering greatly as well. It may not be with empty bellies, it may not be with the threat of no where to sleep. But pain is there nonetheless, with empty pocket books, empty homes, empty hearts. Each pain that we face is contrary to God’s will. I do not believe it was ever in God’s great plan for us to suffer, but just as sin entered the world, so did suffering. The call God gives us now is for us to serve each other in the name of Christ, in the hope of alleviating each others pain.

The call for us today is to live lives of discipleship. In our baptisms, we joined this family of disciples. We took on the call to share the good news of Jesus Christ in word and deed, even if it meant suffering for his sake. Our baptismal call is a call to be a support to one another, the children oversees, the single mother down the street, the person sitting next to you in the pew. Jesus is calling for us to bring a balance to our world; to offer our riches to those with nothing. These are the riches of monetary wealth, of a listening ear, of our skills, and of our prayers. We each have so much to offer each other, so that all may be blessed through the gifts that Christ gives us. God has given to us so that we can give to others.

In college, one of my professors use to say we are “blessed to be a blessing.” God has given us the tools to turn our woes into blessings for others. Our riches can be used to bless those who have nothing. If we are now laughing, we can be blessed to bless others who are weeping, by offering a listening ear and a comforting presence. If we are being spoke well of, we can bless others by advocating for them when they are being persecuted. God has blessed us with the gift of discipleship, to come together to bring love and healing to our neighbors, so that all may come to know him through our actions. Reflecting on her words now, it is so evident that she is right. We are all blessed to be a blessing. Amen

A REAL Update!

2007-01-31T17:53:00.000-08:00

I know, it has been quite a while since I posted a real update. So, I will take a few moments now to recap you on all of my exciting adventures this last month!

As most of you know, I went to visit cute little Asher and his family in Oklahoma in mid-January! Even with all the flight delays related to the ice storm and then later a mechanical, it was a wonderful visit and I am so glad I was able to do it.

Over the last couple of months, I have been planning a mid-week children's program called "Faithweaver Friends", created by Group Publishing. We are doing a trial run March-May at the church to see how it goes. It is the hope of the Pastors and I that it will be able to continue next year. This could only be done if it was solely run by the congregation. So, I am trying to make it so I have a very small role in it during the program so they get comfortable enough to continue it later. Please pray it goes well. It has been a lot of work getting it together, but I think it is such an amazing program that would be so good for the kids and adults. So far I have about 20 volunteers. Registration begins this Sunday for the kids.

Next week I am taking some High School kids to the seminary in Gettysburg for a campus visit. Although seminary is a graduate program, if the kids are truly interested in seminary, they can begin preparing now by entering a college track that prepares them for seminary. This would be a major step up for them and would make seminary a lot less scary! My undergraduate in Christian Education was so helpful in my seminary education and is even more helpful now in the parish. All of the kids I am taking are amazing and it is so evident God is calling them into some form of parish ministry.

So, other than that things are pretty normal around here. My cats and I have been enjoying the snowfall we are finally getting. I'm telling you, it was really beginning to feel like Spring! Now it is much more normal with temperatures averaging in the teens and snow on the forecast for each day. We love it!

Please be in prayer as the Pastors are going out of the country for two weeks. Please pray for their safe travels and for me and the congregation. I'm both nervous and excited about being on my own. This will be great preparation for when they go sabbatical for a month.

My Latest Epiphany Sermon

2007-01-14T17:07:00.000-08:00

“They have no wine” exclaimed the mother of Jesus. The jars were empty. The jars that were moments ago full are now barely wet from what once satisfied the dry mouths of many. The celebration that was carrying on in honor of the newly married couple is beginning to die down as their mouths crave the sweet taste of wine. What will they do now? Should the celebration just end and everyone go home to where there may be something to quench their thirst? Should they continue on dancing and put their dry mouths out of their minds? What will become of the celebration that had barely just begun?

Just as the party was at risk for dying down completely, Jesus calmly, seemingly unnoticed, gave directions to fill the jars with water and suddenly, out came wine. The first person to taste it, who mistakingly gave credit to the bridegroom whose wedding was being celebrated, exclaimed, “Everyone serves the good wine first, and then the inferior wine after the guests have become drunk. But you have kept the good wine until now.”

The emptiness that was ready to overtake the party was now filled with the greatest source of joy and fulfillment. The mouths that were once dry were now wet. The bellies that were at risk for becoming empty were now filled to completeness. And the laughter and dancing that was at risk for disappearing was at its peak.

As I ponder the wedding at Cana and its significance to our lives, I find that it lies simply in the six stone jars the held the wine. These jars probably sat empty in a corner for an undesignated amount of time, gathering cobwebs and dust. They were unused, unnoticed, uncared for until someone needed them. They were empty, they were alone, they were forgotten.

How often have we felt like that? Those times in our lives where we merely go through the motions, trying to get through life as quickly as possible. Staring down a job that doesn’t have much significance to us, other than the fact it pays the bills, feeling like you are just another set of hands that gets the tedious work done. We may live alone, in an assisted living facility or an apartment down the street. We show up occasionally to a church event or go out to a meal or the movies with someone. Yet each day, we go home, to an empty room. At one point we loved the independence, but year after year the solidarity we craved brought with it a feeling of abandonment. No one really cares, no one seems to notice our existence. We feel empty and alone.

This empty void that can overtake us can feel unbearable. We try and find something, anything, that can bring us out of the darkness, out of that corner, and into the light. We fill ourselves with anything we can, just like the jars that were filled at the beginning of the party with the cheap, store brand style wine. Our intention is to bring ourselves some hope, some excitement, anything to get us out and moving. We search for anything that can help. We shop for things at the store that may bring some light, filling that void with material possessions. We hold parties at our homes in order to be social again. We drown our sorrows through alcohol or relationships with someone we don’t really care about, just to have the companionship. We try and try and try to bring ourselves out of the despair, only to find the wine wasn’t that good anyways and that we are standing there, empty again.

Just when everything seemed hopeless, the jars are empty and almost ignored, Christ fills them. He fills them not only with wine but the best of wine. To the surprise of all, suddenly these jars that were once alone in a corner, gathering dust, are now holding the best gift possible to keep the celebration going. The credit for this great gift is mistakingly given to the bridegroom, yet came from the most unexpected person, that of Jesus.

This story captures the great gift that Jesus has come to offer. That emptiness that overtook the jars now disappeared and they were overflowing with the greatest of wines. The emptiness that filled the world would no longer rule as Jesus brought it hope, love, and grace. That emptiness that can at times consume our lives is not ignored by the one who came with a superabundance of gifts. Christ has come to fill us with his grace.

Jesus has given to us the good wine. The best wine. The wine that inaugurates God’s new age, where we have the hope of eternal life, and love that has no end. This simple act that Jesus performed at the wedding holds with it a sign that points directly to Jesus’ glory. He would, a short time from the wedding, sacrifice his life for our sake.

We live lives that are so fast paced, that it is so easy to be overcome with emptiness and despair. Although the good wine has already been given and we have the gift of grace through Jesus Christ, this knowledge can easily be left in the dark corners of our lives. Time and time again, we can get consumed by the little things in our lives that eventually become too much to handle. We feel empty, alone, and forgotten. The troubles of this world encompass our every movement, our every thought, our every prayer. Although we know there is a God, we feel abandoned.

And yet the good wine has been given. God’s glory has been manifested through Jesus Christ, and grace has been offered. We are not alone even when it seems we are. We are loved even when it seems impossible. We are filled with the Holy Spirit even when our hearts and minds feel empty.

We witness these great provisions each week in worship. In our baptisms, we became members of Christ’s body, as we witness this weekend in the baptism of Aiden. We become a part of a community that is there to support us, to love us, and to demonstrate God’s grace. During those Sundays when we receive Holy Communion, we eat the Body of Christ and drink the good wine of Christ’s blood. We have fellowship with the community of the Body of Christ who witness to us that we are not abandoned and the love of Christ surrounds us. The fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ extend even beyond the sacraments and into the singing of the hymns, the prayers we offer up for one another, the sharing of the peace, and the coffee we drink together afterwards.

We worship together and have fellowship with one another on retreats, in planning meetings, in Sunday school, in Bible study. Through stitch and sew, in making quilts for those who need, each stitch brings with it love and prayers for the unknown person the quilt will go to. Through that blanket which is meant to provide physical comfort, it comforts the heart as well. The good wine is given by filling that person with hope and love, letting them know they are not forgotten. We also have fellowship with one another by visiting those who are unable to attend church anymore on Sundays. We demonstrate to them that Christ has not abandoned them. God’s love is still extended, and they can have fellowship with the Body of Christ.

We, as a community, share the news of the good wine with each other. Jesus Christ offers us a body that helps us to know that we are not left in the dark corners. We are loved beyond measure and together we can help each other move beyond the feelings of abandonment, fear, and loneliness, and into a fellowship among our brothers and sisters. This is a part of the grace God gives us. It is a gift. It is the good wine that is overflowing through us. We are loved, we are forgiven, and we are given each other. Amen.

Please Support Amy's Cause

2007-01-10T07:49:00.000-08:00

Please Support Amy's cause. We at Asher and ^Jacob's^ site have been Katia fans for years, and are so pleased to see someone trying to raise money for the Solomon's Foundation. Please take a moment and go to the links below.

As for me, I am doing well and promise a real update soon. Life is busy, Mom is leaving tonight, I am leaving for Oklahoma on Sunday and then head off for a retreat as soon as I get back. It's a little crazy, but I love it!

-Laura

Amy is losing weight to gain awareness!!!

Please join me in my weight loss challenge.
I’m looking for sponsors to raise funds and awareness for the
KATIA SOLOMON FOUNDATION.
http://www.katiasolomonfoundation.org/

January 1st 2007 – June 30th 2007
I will have a weekly weigh-in & blog so you can follow my progress.
I’ve set up a MySpace site at:
http://www.myspace.com/austinlukeandsavannahsmom

Please visit Katia’s Caringbridge website to learn about this brave little ladybug.
http://caringbridge.org/fl/katia_leukemiapage/

The Solomon’s have done so much to help in the fight against blood cancers.
Are you ready to do your part? Please join me in the fight.
You can make a difference!!!
I’m asking for you to sponsors me $1 for every pound I am able to lose.
I would also ask that if you are able to please become a regular blood donor.
You are also very much needed on the
National Marrow Registry.
http://www.marrow.org/

Christmas and the Family

2007-01-01T18:42:00.000-08:00

I am so very sorry it has been so long since my last update. To catch up, let me first say "Merry Christmas" and "Happy New Year"!

Much has been going on since my last update. I had family in town, including my younger sister from Seattle, my Grandfather who lives in PA, and my mother from Alaska. All but my mother have now gone home. It is slowly getting back to normal which makes me both happy and sad. We had a wonderful Christmas and I was reminded how spoiled we are! :)

This last weekend, I led worship services alone for the first time. It was a bit overwhelming but I think it went really well. Aside from the nervous stomach, I actually really enjoyed it. It was good preparation for when the Pastor's go on their month long sabbatical, as well as when I am on my own for good as a pastor!

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas! I promise more updates, with pictures, very soon. Right now I need to get to bed to gather up the energy for this busy week, which includes snowtubing, mall hide and seek, and the regular business of vicar life!

2nd Sunday in Advent Sermon

2006-12-11T12:16:00.000-08:00

During the Advent season, we spend the weeks prior to Christmas waiting and preparing. It is a time to prepare ourselves for the coming of Jesus Christ. In Luke, we hear the Isaiah passage recalled that says “prepare the way of the Lord, make his paths straight”. It is here in Luke that we are able to see the fulfillment of this passage.

We learn that the voice in the wilderness is that of John the Baptist. Throughout the gospel, we discover John to be a man who many would not want to be around. He has been living in the wilderness throughout his adult life, eating locusts, running around in camel hair and a leather belt, most likely rarely bathing. His proclamation of God’s Word was not in the soft sweet voices we are so use to hearing on television or in church. He had a temper and was known to go around telling people how he saw it.

Despite all that would make John despicable to most, he was the one God has chosen to get the world ready for the coming Messiah. We are told that the “Word of God came to John”, just as it had to Abraham, Samuel, Nathan, Elijah, and Jeremiah. This divine message is bearing good news to all people. It is a message to awaken people to prepare themselves and each other for the coming Messiah.

John was given the task of preparing the hearts of the people through his preaching, which included a call to a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. John’s baptism was done as a way of putting one on God’s side. To refuse to repent and be baptized by water was viewed as rejecting God, even for those who led good, obedient lives. John knew this baptism was merely a preparatory one, one of repentance, and that Jesus would soon bring a baptism of the Holy Spirit.

The word repentance means to make a change in one’s mind or thinking. As God was using John the Baptist to prepare the hearts of all for the coming Messiah, he was calling for people to change how they perceived God and their relation to him. Through the Messiah, they would see God in a whole new light, in human flesh. It would no longer be a God who seemed far off, but one walking side by side with them. Soon, the way they related to God would be completely different then they had ever known, because the Messiah would come, not as the warrior many expected, but as a small child. Jesus would change the way people were to relate to God through his life, teachings, death and resurrection. Those who would follow the Messiah would find themselves changing their way of thinking. They would repent.

Over the last eight or so years, I have spent my summers as a either a pre-school teacher or nanny in someone’s home. These experiences have offered me many opportunities to observe the exuberance of the average three year old as they strive to discover their independence.

As most parents and preschool teachers can attest to, three years olds LOVE to do absolutely everything on their own. “I can do it by myself” is their favorite phrase. I can picture many past moments where I watched as one of my preschoolers eagerly grabbed the plates and silverware to set the table for our class lunch, throwing up a hand anytime I came near to help shouting, “NO! I can do it!” Picturing what I knew would be an on-coming disaster when they tried to set the pitcher of milk on the table, I would stand there and cringe. Then, moments later, I would be at the table trying to clean up the spilt milk with a huddle of three year olds screaming “I can do it!”

I use this example as I think it strongly relates to our relationship with God. So often in life, we view ourselves as being the ones who can change our situation. We hold onto the reigns of our life and circumstances, unwilling to change our way of thinking unless it fits what we think must happen. Just like the three year old, we believe we can set the table all by ourselves, when in reality the task at hand is too big, and our hands are just too small to hold the pitcher without losing our grip.

The repentance we are called to is not one that does not seek outside help. The call is to move beyond the thinking “I can do it all by myself” and into “I can’t do it all by myself.” We need Christ because without him we are merely sinful human beings, wallowing in hopelessness and despair, attempting to break free without success. Through him, we are forgiven and cleansed of all unrighteousness, something we have no power to do on our own. Anytime sin is spoken of in the gospel of Luke, we hear the offer of forgiveness. Through Christ, sin and forgiveness cannot be separated. In those moments where our thinking switches back to thinking we can do it on our own, the love and forgiveness given to us in Jesus is there, offered to us as a free gift.

The fulfillment of the Isaiah passage recalled in Luke does not end at the call to prepare ourselves for the coming Messiah. It goes beyond this and moves into the promise that every valley will be filled, mountains will be made low, the crooked paths made straight and the rough ways made smooth. It is here that we learn how the world changes through the coming of the Messiah. It is thought that the meaning of this passage is one of equality.

The world we live in today is still imprisoned with so many barriers. We do not live in a culture free from inequality. There are still separations based on race, economic standing, marital status, age, and even sexual orientation which place us in our different categories. Our world offers us opportunity upon opportunity to separate ourselves from others. Yet, Christ came to change all of this. The message given to us is not one of the rich become poor and the poor become rich, but one where the rich and poor meet in the middle. It is no longer slave and free, male and female, Jew and Gentile. Through Christ we are all made equals and the gift of salvation is given to all.

The last line of the call John the Baptist is making states, “and all flesh shall see the salvation of God.” One might ask, however, where is the salvation of God? How can we possibly have seen it when our world still seems turned upside down? The salvation of God is seen in Jesus. In the Gospels, we hear of how when Simeon saw the infant Jesus, his thinking about death changed. When Jesus came to his home, Zaccheus stated “today salvation has come to this house”. As a result his thinking about wealth changed. When we change our thinking, when we repent, we see the salvation of God. We recognize that Jesus is the one who offers us, each and every one of us, grace and forgiveness. He is salvation, come to us in the form of a child.

No, our world is not perfect. It may seem the crooked paths are still crooked. The mountains are still impossibly high and the rough ways continue to get rougher. Neighbors still hate neighbors, segregation is still alive and well, and wars continue to grow stronger by the moment. Yet, the world is not what we judge God’s salvation by. Salvation is not seen in the diagnosis of cancer. It is not seen on the streets of Iraq. It is seen in the eyes of a child, born in a manger for our sake. It is seen in the eyes of the Messiah. So, let us look not to ourselves when looking for a smooth path, for we cannot create one on our own. Let us repent, change our thinking, and pass the pitcher of milk to the one who is given for our sake who will make the path smooth for us. Amen

Trip and the Troublemaker

2006-11-28T15:25:00.000-08:00

Well, Melancthon was actually a troublemaker before the trip! Last week, this sweet, innocent looking kitty decided to sneak out when I was trying to bring in boxes. Surprisingly, however, I did not discover he was gone till the next day! Katy, my other angel, was going crazy running from window to window crying. Finally I realized Mel was not at my heels, and then the panic set in. After a few hours, a missed meeting, and several tears, he decided the rain that was starting to come down was not appealing and came home. He had no voice, but he was home!

It amazed me how emotional I became when he disappeared. I think it stems from the fact he became a part of my life during such a rough time of transition. Moving cross country, beginning a four year Master's program (a seminary no less), and all the growing up that came with it made him my little family. Plus, he has the personality of no cat I have ever met (sorry Katy!). He is too cute and such a loud, codependent kitty. Such a baby!

This morning I arrived back in Pennsylvania after six days with my family in Seattle. It was wonderful to be completely spoiled with home-cooked meals, my puppy, and of course being surrounded by family. I am really looking forward to having some of them out for Christmas this year. It is strange to think that I will be hosting Christmas! Wow, how life changes...

Content

2006-11-09T19:15:00.000-08:00

Don't kitties just have the best life?! If only we could all sleep that content everyday?

My days are passing by so quickly lately. I can hardly believe I leave to spend thanksgiving with my family in less than two weeks. I am looking forward to it so very much.

Although I am enjoying internship, I am ready to get away for a few days. It will be so nice to spend my days like my cats! Sleeping, eating, looking out the window daydreaming, and chilling with my loved ones. I don't think it gets much better than that!

My sermon last weekend went very well. I felt it was one of my better ones, but like most students, I still have a long way to go. My biggest critique is that I really need to learn to expand upon the ideas I have. I am one of those people who gets to the point so quick without taking time to reflect. I think the more I preach, the better I will get at that.

This weekend I go to a junior high event for three days. We have a large group of kids going, and I am really looking forward to this. As a kid, I never got to go to these things, so it will be a great learning experience for me. I can't wait!

All Saints Sermon (my third sermon at this church)

2006-11-04T18:09:00.000-08:00

A couple years ago, the world said goodbye to one of its saints. I had the privilege of being by his bedside as he took his last breaths. He was a man whom I had never met before. To this day, I cannot remember his name; but I know he was a saint.

Earlier that day, this man was walking out of his home, as he did every afternoon, to check the mail across the street. His age slowed him down a bit, but that did not stop him from maintaining this daily routine. The house he had lived in most of his life was built at the crest of a ridge, which made it difficult for on-coming cars to see what may be happening at the top. This unfortunate location was the cause of this man’s death. As he was headed back to his house, a car struck him.

When I arrived at the hospital that day, this gentleman had already been to the surgery, and his family was waiting outside the intensive care unit for news of his condition. It was a larger family, all of whom came together to pray for and physically be there for their loved one.

I spent the evening with them, waiting, telling stories, and praying. I learned of this gentleman’s background, how he was a hard worker who loved his family dearly. His first wife had passed away and just months ago he had married a very sweet woman. There was nothing spectacular that stood out about him, other than the love that was so evident in the room.

He was a man of strong faith. The family shared with me some of his favorite Bible verses and hymns. We sang those hymns around his bed with his ministers from home, nurses, and doctors. As we continued to have what became a worship service, this saint slowly took his last breath. And there, at around 5:30 in the morning, we said goodbye.

Today is the festival of All Saint’s Day. It is a day in which we remember the saints that have gone before us, and the ones living in our midst. The Greek word for saint is hagios, which means holy. The word Holy literally means to “be set apart”, some paraphrase this as “special.”

In the Old Testament, something became holy when it came in contact with holy things. An example of this is in Exodus 29:37 where it says: “For seven days make atonement for the altar and consecrate it. Then the altar will be most holy, and whatever touches it will be holy.” Contact with holy things was limited solely to the priests. This created a separation and hierarchy among the priests and common people.

For us, there is no longer this hierarchy or separation. Jesus changed all that. We come into contact with holiness all the time through our contact with God. Our Holy God makes contact with us through the Word, the waters of forgiveness in Baptism, the body and blood of Jesus Christ in Holy Communion, and the fellowship we have in the Body of Christ. Through all of this, we are made saints, because God’s love for us is so great that he has come into contact with each of us.

God has given each of us the title of saint as a gift. Through Jesus’ death and resurrection, we were given grace, so that, in baptism, our old selves die to sin and we are raised to new life. Daily, we are called to repent and God forgives us, bringing us to a new life beyond all our sins. We are now not labeled as sinner in God’s eyes, we are labeled a saint. Not because we live a great life, but because we are in contact with the Holy God.

All Saints Day is a day to remember the saints that have gone before us, but it is also a day to remember the gift God has given us in making us all saints. We are saints here and now because we are connected with the Holy God here and now. Sometimes it is difficult for us to realize this. The focus is not on the new life we have been given as a saint, but on the life of the sinner.

In our Gospel text, we hear about Lazarus. He is there, dead in the grave. There is nothing he can do to get himself out of his situation, he is complete dependent upon the power of God in Christ to give him his new life. When he is raised and comes out of the tomb, we have this image of Lazarus still bound in the grave clothes, which Jesus proceeds to tell him to remove.

The question is, are we not just like Lazarus, coming out of our baptisms, raised to a new life yet still hanging onto our grave clothes? It can be difficult to leave the old sinful life behind and take on the title of saint. We recognize that daily we still sin, there is no way to get around that. Yet recognizing that our Holy God sees us as a saint is hard to grasp. We tend to keep our grave clothes on, holding onto those sins Jesus freed us from.

The humanness we all possess makes it difficult to move beyond the sins we have done. The way we hurt our best friend, the loud harsh words we said to our child when we were just too tired to deal with their never-ending questions, or possibly the time I hit someone I love? How can we ever let these things go, when we, the one who sinned, hurt just as much, if not more, then the victim? Letting go of our sinful past can be so hard. Accepting the present and future title of saint can feel nearly impossible. Yet Jesus still calls us to take off our grave clothes and go.

There was a great quote handed to me earlier this week from a Jan Karon book entitled “Light From Heaven”. It states “Every saint has a past. Every sinner has a future.” Yes, all have pasts. Every single one of us in this room is guilty of being a sinner. Every one of us has lied, cheated, stolen, or done some kind of wrong. We all have a past and we all continue to do wrong things in the present. The marvelous thing is, we have been forgiven our past and will continue to be forgiven our wrongdoings. We all have a future. God has claimed each of us as his own and given us the title of saint. We have that reality, and we have the hope that comes with it.

The gentleman in the hospital was just like each of us. I am certain that he had hurt most of the people who were by his bedside at one time or another. Yet, in the last hours of his life, each of those people were there by his side, holding his hand stroking his hair, telling him how much he was loved. To them, no matter what he had done, he was still perfectly loved. That is how our Holy God is to us. We are loved, perfectly, by the God who has deemed us as saint. And, like the saint in the hospital bed, all have the hope of the resurrection awaiting us in the future. Amen.

2006-10-31T13:24:00.000-08:00

Make an online slide show at onetruemedia.com

An Update!

2006-10-29T16:15:00.000-08:00

I am very sorry for the length of time it has been since my last update. As you may imagine, things have been pretty busy and I just now am having a chance to update this blog!

Outside of internship, my time has been spent doing the basic household stuff, and working on Asher and Jacob's Friends. For those who do not know, this is a volunteer group dedicated to praying for and offering support to parents who have lost a child or have one who is seriously ill. If you would like to join, just go to the link on the adorable picture of my monkey nephew!

Other than that, I have been enjoying my work at the church! I just now got back from a Harvest Party. The children were adorable as usual. I went as "Olga the Sleepy Viking!" I took a short nap this afternoon and figured why get out of my pajamas when it is a costume party! I knew I could work it into my costume somehow. It worked wonderfully and was oh so comfortable!

The town has been very windy and cold this week. At the halloween parade I nearly froze my toes off. In actuality, I love this time of year. It is so pretty and the cold gets me in the mood for the upcoming holidays. As a native northwesterner, I have learned to appreciate the rain and "dreary" days. My perfect way to spent it would be curled up in my pajamas with some hot chocolate and a good movie (I read enough for school and work!). I am looking forward to having a tree in the corner of the room too, as it makes the mood just right!

Well, that is all for now. Please check out the updates on the friends list below. This time of year tends to be rough for so many families.

-Vicar Laura

Busy Busy Busy!

2006-10-19T15:06:00.000-07:00

Wow, I cannot believe it has been so long since I have done an update! I guess things have kept fairly busy over here. I am enjoying work immensely, though had to slow down a bit this week. I got a pretty nasty cold and lost my voice for a few days, but it seems to be clearing up. I am so grateful for this, as this upcoming weekend I have a senior high retreat. It really wouldn't be good to have no voice when trying to lead Bible studies, would it?!

Other than that, it has just been the basic busyness of work. Next week I will begin doing home Communion. I am looking forward to this, as it will give me an opportunity to meet congregational members I have not had the chance to get out to see. Also, I will be heading back to Gettysburg for a day of lectures. I'm honestly not looking forward to the lectures, but it will be good to see some friends I haven't seen in a while. Please check out the updates on Asher's Friend's list. It saddens me the list continues to grow. I love being introduced to new families, but I hate that more children are ill.

Missing Home

2006-10-12T14:53:00.000-07:00

This is a picture of my "little" sister Jamie, stepmom Patty, and I at Pike Place Market during my trip home in August. As usually happens during this time of year, I am beginning to miss home a bit. I think it is related to the upcoming holidays. Thankfully, I will go home for thanksgiving and then have family come out for Christmas. I can't wait!

Things have been slowing down some regarding work. Part of me is elated, the other part doesn't know what to do! This is the first time things have really slowed down enough for me to rest a bit and reflect on how life has changed so much in the last 6 weeks. Well, if I really look back, how things have changed in the last six months! Becoming an Aunty to two beautiful boys, losing Jacob, walking out on my job, going to Oklahoma, going to Maine, going BACK to Oklahoma, then Seattle, and finally, my move to Hollidaysburg. I cannot believe how much has happened in such a short period of time. It all seems so surreal.

Off to Bible Club! Till next time...

-Vicar Laura

By the way, I absolutely hate moving Asher's friends to the Angel section. Please keep Jake's and Caleb's family in your prayers. I also added some more angels. It takes some time to add new names, so I am doing it in spurts. Please be on the lookout for more new names in the near future.

Loves Of My Life

2006-10-08T18:10:00.000-07:00

I had to show you a picture of my beautiful children, Melancththon and Katharina, and then of course my gorgeous nephew Asher on nasal cannula. Isn't wonderful to see his face?! I am praying so hard soon he will be completely tube and bag free (he also has a colostomy).

Life has been going fairly well this week. I started my Bible Club, which will last for seven weeks and is each thursday night. We had about twelve children show up. I must admit the program was a little rough around the edges, but now that we know about how many kids and what ages I will have the chance to really adapt everything. I am praying the program is successful in teaching the children about the basics of the Lutheran church and is fun for them and us.

Today I went horseback riding for the second time! This trip was with the 5-6th graders. I was much better this time around! I am getting more comfortable with it and actually really enjoyed myself. The mountains are so pretty with all the different colored leaves. I took pictures and will post them soon, possibly tomorrow. Oh, and I was so close to taking home this really cute kitten there at the stables. He was so tiny and oh so cute! Good thing I have a little self-control and my supervisor to remind me that I do not need nor do I want to be a crazy cat lady! :)

Thank you all for checking in on "Aunt Laura", leaving me wonderful comments, and of course for praying.

A Very Proud Aunty

2006-10-03T18:31:00.000-07:00

I typically don't use this journal to update on Asher, as he does have his own very popular website, but I am so proud I can't help myself. He has made such strides in the last couple of weeks, with going from the vent to CPAP and lowered oxygen levels. And now, today, he took his first try at nasal cannula and did amazingly well. He also had his first bottle, and was able to take in 5cc's. What an amazing child. I am so ready to hop on a plane! I cannot wait to go down to Oklahoma for his homecoming; I know it will be very soon!

Okay, so now onto vicar life! Thank so much for all your prayers regarding the funeral. It went amazingly well. The family was so gracious towards me and offered such words of encouragement. In some ways, it was almost more like they were ministering to my needs than the other way around. I guess God was using all of us to be there for each other; what a gift.

This weekend I also preached for the second time at this congregation. I felt a little uneasy about my sermon, as I had very little time to write it. It seems God always takes the sermons I think are awful and turns them towards good, as the congregation thought it was wonderful. One area I really need to work on is trusting in the words God has given me in the sermons.

Alright, I am off to go and work on my amazon wishlist. I keep forgetting how close Christmas is getting! I can't wait to get my tree up!

Another First

2006-10-01T19:48:00.000-07:00

Hello friends!

I just wanted to jump on here really quick to ask you to please pray for me tomorrow, as I will be doing my first "solo" funeral. Pray that God uses me to minister to the family as they mourn the death of their loved one. Amazingly, I have a sense of peace about it; I can only attribute that to God's presence.

I promise to do a much fuller update in the near future. This week has just been absolute madness and I have not had much of a chance to take a moment to breathe. When I have that opportunity, I will be on here, filling you in on all the details!

-A Very Tired Vicar

Many Thanks

2006-09-27T11:32:00.000-07:00

I wanted to jump on here to thank each of you from the bottom of my heart for the loving comments you have left on here. Knowing so many of you feel the same way about these special children warms my heart. I considered it such an honor to attend Christi's service, and I know so many of the rest of you would have loved to join me in saying goodbye to her at the funeral mass. Please know when I went, I considered myself a representative of all her faithful followers from the website.

In regards to Asher's friends list, well, it is something I always wanted to do. Before Asher and Jacob were born, I had been following many of these sites for about 2 years. When we started the boys website, I knew it would be a great opportunity to bring attention to other kids in need of prayer. I had no idea it would become such a great ministry. I praise God often for blessing me with the opportunity to update the list and ask for prayers for them (and pray for them myself). Thank you for continuing to bring my attention to new kids; what a blessing you all are. I consider you to be my partners in the Asher's Friends Ministry; without you the list would not be what it is today.

Angel Christi

2006-09-23T18:11:00.000-07:00

Today I attended Christi Thomas' funeral mass. The 5 1/2 hour drive up, I continually debated whether or not I should be making the journey. Some told me I grow too attached to the children whose stories I follow through blogspot, caringbridge, and carepages. Others encouraged me that I was doing the right thing. But, I must say, it was kind of strange driving so far to attend the funeral of a child I had never met in person.

The service was beautiful. It truly honored the life of a girl who touched so many through her brave fight with neuroblastoma. So many people were there, each with their own story of how they knew her and how she touched them. I certainly had my own story, yet still felt a little out of place.

It was not until a lovely couple came up to me during the reception, that I began to feel like I was meant to be there. They were excited to meet someone who came to know her through the website and loved looking through the stories some of you sent for Shayla. I then had the opportunity to go and meet Christi's parents and sister. The second I said my name, Angela recognized me (that made me feel good!). It was in our short encounter, a mere few minutes, that I came to know the full reason God sent me there. It was not only for the family, it was also for me. It was my opportunity to not only grieve over the loss of Christi, but all of the other children who I have prayed for yet never had the chance to meet. It is amazing how one can bond to total strangers. I really needed an opportunity to formally cry over the loss of so many precious fighters. It is not that I grow too attached to them, though a bond is formed. The fact is that each and every child that I come across somehow makes me a better person. They impact how I do ministry and how I live my life. I hug stronger, I call my family more, I pray more, and I empathize more. I realize that my life is not my life, but is a gift given to me by God to serve Him. Each and every time I come across a new sick child, I am reminded of that.

Alright, so that is a super long tangent, but it is the revelation I had today while being in the midst of Christi's family and friends. What a great teacher she was and will continue to be to so many, even in her death.

Laura

So Much Sadness

2006-09-19T15:52:00.000-07:00

I took this picture while in Oklahoma. It is a statue across the street from the Oklahoma City Bombing site that was placed by a Catholic Bishop whose parsonage was located there. This had to be the most powerful part of the memorial.

I saw this picture earlier today, and it really turned my mind towards all of the children who are suffering right now, particularly Emmie Rose and Christi. It seems that when things begin to calm down and life becomes more peaceful, more suffering comes to the forefront.

Please, if any of you get the chance today, check on the children on Asher's friends list, located in the update previous to this one. If this is something you have never done before, I strongly encourage you to do so. I know it takes alot our of you emotionally; it does me on a daily basis. I also know of the temptation to separate yourself as much as possible from the pain others are facing. Doesn't it feel like our own pain is plenty?! But I promise you, even though it is agonizing to be any kind of witness to the suffering of another, particularly a child, you will get so much in return. My life has been greatly enriched through praying for and getting to know each of these children.

Leaving On A Jetplane!

2006-09-18T09:16:00.000-07:00

I have a ticket to fly home for Thanksgiving! I could not be more excited to have the opportunity to spend this time with my family and friends. It is so difficult to come to the realization so many of my holidays from this time on will be spent away from family (as holidays tend to be work days for Pastors). This, of course, will be determined by where my first call is of course. I may be blessed with being assigned to the northwest synod, where the majority of my family lives. We'll see in two years what happens!

This week has been really good. I had a full day off work on Saturday, and spent it in my pajamas watching movies, hanging out on the internet, and on the phone hearing about how Asher's extubation went (www.caringbridge.org/visit/asherandjacob).

Sunday we had a 5 1/2 hour confirmation course on the sacraments. It is neat, as in this church instead of doing weekly courses, they turn them into 3 block courses throughout the year. This makes it much easier on the families and I really think the kids learn more. It was fun getting to know the jr. high kids. It seems many of the stereotypes i've made about teenagers just aren't true. So many of them have great hearts regarding their faith and one another. What a blessing to see.

Sunday I also got to assist with my first baptism. This has to be one of my coolest experiences yet! I cannot wait for the day I get to preside over my first one. I have to say, this is one of the first times I didn't cry at a baptism. Typically I am a bowl of mush, but as I had a role in this one, I was distracted enough to where I didn't fall apart!

Sugar and Horses!

2006-09-14T12:44:00.000-07:00

Please see my prayer request for Asher below!

Hello everyone! It has been a while since my last post; I apologize. Life has been quite busy here in vicarland. Last friday I had a 5-6th grade lock-in, which was a blast. I think next time we should put a limit on the sugar intake though! Then after the worship services on Sunday I went horseback riding with the senior high youth. This was my first time ever horseback riding, and let me tell you I was nervous! Thankfully, I had the most lazy horse of the bunch. All Domino wanted to do was eat! I had to keep grabbing the reigns and pulling his head up, poor thing. If I didn't have all these other horses trailing after us, I would've stopped to let him eat in peace! I have two more horseback riding trips coming up; I hope my comfort will continue to grow.

Other than that, I have been attending lots of meetings and Bible studies. I've also gone to a ministerium meeting, with Pastors from other denominations in the area. I did some visitation by myself and have had LOTS of paperwork! There are so many things involved with ministry that we don't always realize. Pastors are definitely busy people! At the end of the week, I will have done almost 70 hours of work. The average I have been putting in is close to 50. One thing I know I will learn this year is how to balance work and self-care.

Thank you for checking in! Sometime in the next few days I should have my new verizon DSL hooked up, so I will be able to add pictures! I also promise that with having faster internet connection, my updates will be more frequent.

-Vicar Laura

Happy Prayer Vigil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please be in prayer RIGHT NOW! The doctor is talking about possibly taking Asher OFF the vent within the next few days. He said not to get too excited (is he kidding?) but they are going to try. PLEASE BE IN MAJOR PRAYER that not only they try the transition, but he is able to stay off the vent. Before they can wean him off the vent, his oxygen, which has been in the 50's and 60's lately, needs to come down. After the vent, he will be on CPAP, which typically is short term. After that he will be put on nasal cannula. Please pray CPAP is merely a short term deal, and Asher is able to get onto nasal cannula quickly.
Also, they are going to try and get him on full feedings at the same time. This would mean no more lipids or TPN. Please pray he is able to handle full feedings. After the Vent, CPAP, and full feedings happen, all we would probably need is bottle feedings.
We are cautiously optimistic about all of this. These are major transitions for our little monkey, so please pray he is able to handle it like the champ he has always been! Thank you, faithful followers. Please spread the word to all your prayer chains, families, friends, etc. Praying for a productive week!!!!!!!!
VERY PROUD,
Aunt Laura, Mommy,Daddy, Grandmas, Grandpa, Aunties, Cousins, etc

Keeping Busy!

2006-09-07T06:48:00.000-07:00

Well, life stays busy in vicarland! I have busily been working on a 7 weeks children's program, to begin the first week of August. It is on the basics of Lutheranism (reformation, baptism, communion, etc). I think it will be great, especially since I have a bunch of retired teachers eager to help!

Please be in prayer for me tomorrow. I am assisting with my first funeral, as well as doing a lock-in with a bunch of 5-6th graders! It will be a crazy day, but I know God is guiding me throughout. Thank you for checking in! I know this is short but I need to get back to work!

-Vicar Laura :)

My first sermon as a vicar!

2006-09-04T11:59:00.000-07:00

For my first sermon, I was asked to speak a little bit about who I am and what has brought me to this place in my life. When looking at the Gospel text for this Sunday, I can honestly say to you that I had a difficult time relating it to my faith journey. I then proceeded to read our lesson from James. Now, I must admit, like most people in ministry, I can't stand the book of James! Yet, at the same time, in reading it I realized there was a great deal of relevance between the text adn my own life. So, today I will be brave, bold, and will introduce myself to you by preaching on one of the least liked books in the Bible!
In studying James, I have come to believe the bad reputation the book has received is a bit unfair. Sure, the name of Jesus Christ is certainly missing, as it is mentioned only twice and the cross is only mentioned once. Baptism is left out of the picture as is grace. So, really it is not the most Lutheran book in the New Testament. This is emphasized by Martin Luther describing James as "an epistle of straw that is easily consumed by fire. When the straw is burned away, the pure golden nuggest of the Gospel is missing." But, as with any book in the Bible, James does have its place.
The focus of James is works. We as Lutherans tend to view the term "works" as a dirty, evil word. I know my defenses come up any time I hear it in regards to faith and I find myself spurting out, "I am not saved by works but am justified by grace through faith in Jesus Christ!". Then, finding myself out of breath, I go and get a drink of water and go to my quiet place to calm down. The question is, how did we get this way? Why are we so against works in regards to our faith?
Part of this can be attributed to the history of Christianity over the last 2000 years or so. If we look back at the time of the Reformation, people were buying indulgences in an attempt to take years off their time in purgatory. There was a significant amount of idol worship of varying kinds. People throughout history have frantically searched for ways to cleanse themselves of their sin by doing anything and everything imaginable to get into heaven.
Look at the messages we receive today. I have heard many people say to others what constitutes as a real relationship with Jesus Christ. To go to heaven, you need to pray more. You need to go to church more. You need to speak in tongues. You cup needs to be overflowing and you need to open the door of your heart to Jesus Christ. The general message in Christian society is that in order to go to heaven, we need to do this, this, and this. When viewing works this way, it is a little easier to understand our sensitivity regarding this subject, as we believe it is not by our own doing that we are saved, it is by what Christ has done FOR us.
So why do we have the book of James in the first place? Should we just ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist? If we still consider it to be scriptural, where does its message fit into our faith lives?
It may come as a surprise to learn that I did not grow up in church. My parents made the conscious decision early on that they would allow each of us, my two sisters and I, to determine what we believed in regards to religion. You see, my mother was a presbyterian and my father grew up in the mormon church. Upon becoming an adult, my father left the church and had no desire to ever participate in any denomination again.
Throughout my childhood, I had a fascination with religion. Most of my friends were active in their various religions, including: Mormon, Catholic, Buddhist, and Presbyterian. I tagged along with many of them and had a tremendous desire to discover what I believed to be true. An almost nightly ritual I established with my mother was asking her if we could go to church. Typically, there was some reason as to why we could not go, but this desire never escaped me.
In 1992, my parents divorcd, and both married someone new within two years time. My mother's new husband had lived in Alaska for many years and desired to return. So, in 1994, we moved from Kirkland, WA to Petersburg, AK. This was a difficult transition for my sisters and I, especially because our father remained in Seattle. To make the situation even more complex, two weeks after we arrived in Alaska, my new stepfather began showing signs of becoming abusive and we left him.
During this time of crisis in our lives, I again asked my mother if we could go to church. For the first time in my life, she said yes. We first began attending the Presbyterian church. On saturday nights, however, my mother also began attending the Lutheran church. She soon invited me to join her, and it eventually became our church family. In 1996, my younger sister Jamie and I were baptized.
In baptism, I was given new birth and made a member of the Body of Christ. Through this, I was inaugurated into a life of discipleship. When the Pastor said, "Let your light so shine before others that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven" I realized that my life was not my own and I was to be a servant of God. It is through this that I can relate to the book of James.
After much prayer and discernment, in 1999 I enrolled in Trinity Lutheran College in Issaquah, WA. It was here that my faith life blossomed. I came to have a deeper understanding of what it means to be a member of the Body of Christ, and spent these four years discerning what God was calling me to do. I received my Bachelor's in Christian education in 2003, and then enrolled in seminary. Originally, I came to Gettysburg to become a pediatric hospice chaplain, but through my academic courses and life experiences, I now believe my call to be in the parish as an ordained minister.
The book of James calls us to put our faith into action. "Be doers of the word and not merely hearers." The concept of doing encompasses the practical implications of what it means to be a Christian. For me, part of putting my faith into action was to go to Bible college and then seminary. For others, it could be something entirely different. God does not call everyone to become an ordained minister. But God does call all of us to a life of ministry.
We are all called to practice love towards one another. Faith is not to be separated from this. Some have put this as not just talking the talk but walking the walk. Our faith is evidenced through our actions. The greatest strength within our Lutheran tradition is one of the greatest dangers we face. We believe in Christ alone, grace alone, faith alone. We know that we are saved by no one and nothing else other than Christ. So, here is the danger. Why should I do anything for anyone else? Why does it matter how I dress, how I speak, or if I don't do anything for anyone? I'm already saved, so I really don't need to go to church or shovel my neighbors walkway. I have the freedom to do whatever I want without any consequences.
But isn't having faith in Christ more than just a free ticket to heaven? In Holy Communion, we are fed the body and blood of our Lord and Savior in fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ, strengthening and nourishing us to continue on in our lives of discipleship. We are given this gift so that Christ can continue being experienced through us towards others.
What a tremendous gift God has given us in entrusting us with caring for others! Through God blessing us with the free gift of grace, we can become blessings. This, I believe, is the heart of the book of James. No, it doesn't mention grace, and in many ways speaks to works righteousness, but the heart of the message is true. We are all called to care for each other because we have been taken care of by our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. It is not about what we get out of the deal, but about what we have already been given. It is about faith.

Preaching

2006-09-04T06:06:00.000-07:00

Woo hoo, I made it through my first sermon at the church! We have three services, one Saturday night and two Sunday morning so I had many opportunities to refine everything. Praise God, it went really well. Lots of great feedback from both the parishioners and Pastors. Tuesday I meet with one of my supervisors to go over everything in detail. Aside from this, everything is continuing to go wonderfully. I'm almost completely moved in (only dial-up internet still) and am settling into a routine. The church has been keeping me hopping and I truly feel it is where I am supposed to be. This week will be really busy, with a lock-in, horseback riding trip, hospital visits, a funeral, and several other normal church activities. I am hoping Wednesday morning I will be able to go to the sewing circle! Thank you, as always, for checking in and especially for your prayers. Again, I hope within the next couple weeks I will have a faster internet connection so I can get pictures up.

Vicar Life, Part 1

2006-09-01T10:40:00.000-07:00

Wow, I am so sorry for not updating sooner. I arrived at my site on Tuesday, and have slowly been getting my life back in order. My duplex is wonderful, and the cats and I are really enjoying all the additional space. It will take a while to get it fully decorated.

As for vicar life, well, it has been chaotic yet at the same time wonderful. I am getting the last of my sermon finished today, and have my first service tomorrow (there are three each week). I am nervous and excited at the same time. The supervisors, rest of the staff, and the congregants I have met so far have been incredible. I already feel so blessed to have been assigned this church.

I don't have internet yet in my place, but do have it here in the office. I really shouldn't be using the computer for anything but work, but wanted to keep you all informed. Thank you for your prayers, I have certainly been blessed by each of you. More updates (and pictures) to come!

-Vicar Laura

2006-08-15T21:57:00.000-07:00

Hello friends!

Wow, so many questions; thought i'd better hop on here and answer them! First, the green duck is Captain Squirt. He was actually found by some of my seminary friends while doing Katrina relief. He now travels with different students throughout our country and soon the world! I took him with me to Maine a few weeks back and he is now with me in Oklahoma. On Saturday he will fly with me once more to Seattle!

As for internship, I will be headed out to a town near Altoona, north of Gettysburg I think. I am very excited to experience another part of Pennsylvania and to really grown in my skills. Thanks for checking in and I will post more soon! Oh, and please keep Joey's family in your prayers, as well as all of Asher's friends.

What the heck is a "vicar"?!

2006-08-11T11:39:00.000-07:00

The great people at wikepedia have an incredibly detailed definition of "Vicar". Here is what they have to say about the term when used in the Lutheran church:

In the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, The Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod and the Lutheran Church - Canada, a vicar is a candidate for ordained pastoral ministry, serving in a vicariate or internship, usually in the third year of seminary training. Typically at the end of the year of vicarage, the candidate returns to seminary and completes a final year of studies. After being issued a call or assignment, the candidate is ordained as a pastor in the ministry of Word and Sacrament. The role of a vicar in the Lutheran tradition is most comparable to that of a transitional deacon in the Anglican and Roman churches, except that Lutheran vicars are not ordained.
The title "Vikar," used in the Lutheran churches in Germany, is comparable.

Alright, i'm back off to pack! It is amazing, I always thought I kept my apartment somewhat neat. I'm discovering i'm a complete pig and live in a dumpster!!